We have the Oscars to look forward to this weekend, and we’ve decided to seize the moment as an occasion to throw a tiny party with martinis and oysters for myself, Landon, and my brother, who is visiting from Norway and an attentive movie-goer. (His urgent recommendation: “Train Dreams,” which has been on my list for months now.) This is yet another installation of my “fractional entertaining” program for 2026, and by this I mean: I am reaching for smaller, lower-effort gatherings. For this Sunday: just martinis, oysters, and a few prepared snacks and spreads from Organic Butcher. Other recent successful undertakings in this vein: a friend for coffee and takeaway pastries; my parents for rose and charcuterie; a few couples for Chinese delivery and a magnum of sparkling wine. The point is presence and connection, not elaborate spreads and three-course meals that demand a full week of errands and preparations to pull off. The shift has been a liberation for me, dissolving the grind of preparation and leaving only conversation and a couple dishes to throw in the dishwasher.
But I was thinking about the Oscars, about its synonymity with glitz, and I realized that some of the things I consider the height of glamor have nothing to do with red carpets or caviar and everything to do with the settled-in confidence of deciding to live careingly, with discretion and perspective and intention. (Per Mary Oliver: “Listen, are you breathing a little and calling it a life?” ZING!)
Glamor in its smallest venues:
allegiance to a drugstore brand cosmetic over prestige options (“I swear by Pond’s cold cream / Revlon lipstick / etc — have used it for decades”)
museum memberships
ordering the lamb off the menu*
patina in any form (tarnished brass, faded lettering, broken-in leather): proof that something well-loved can persist
making an unexpected alteration to an article of clothing to draw it closer in line with your fashion perspective (tiny embroidered initials, an adjusted neckline, swapped-out laces)
homemade vinaigrette in a small glass jar
gentle self-deprecation (not self-disparagement, but the British brand of self-effacement that signals a healthy ego)
the color chartreuse
curiosity, especially when directed at someone you’ve just met
enormous heaps of the same flower — including inexpensive and stock variety, like baby’s breath, or clusters of branches — arranged in vases
“I have that book on hold at the library”
very simple stationery — i.e., thin black trim and initials — on heavy cardstock
a glass carafe of water at the dining table or on a nightstand
Ray Bans — these simply never lose their cool factor
matching pajama sets / bra and underwear combinations
small Smythson notebooks
cheese for dessert
a wood-handled umbrella
Biscotti and bergamot — both the words and as general concepts
garnishes, especially when non-performative and just for yourself — a slice of lemon in tea, a mint spring in a cocktail
applying lipstick with a compact mirror versus the iPhone camera — likewise, a sleek pillbox versus a baggy
quietly rejecting the ease of pessimism
Post-Scripts.
*The lamb one is probably the most idiosyncratic entry on this list, but I swear — any time I’m at dinner and a friend orders the lamb I always immediately think she’s much chicer, more worldly and discerning and probably better-traveled, than I am! Related: my best friend once ordered veal kidneys (rognons de veau) off a French menu and I think I fell in love with her.
+Thoughts on becoming an expert in yourself.
Shopping Break.
+I own the large version of this handbag and wear it constantly. Obsessed with this petite reimagining in the pastel pink and butter yellow. Impossibly chic. (Also impossibly chic: this vintage Hermes bag. Geeeeez!)
+Currently wearing this elevated athleisure set (sweatshirt, pants) as it snows outside (?! — was 80 yesterday, now snowing!)
+Cutest $30 bandana scarf! J. Crew, Chan Luu, and Madewell also have great options, and all are under $100! Nail the ambient trend and add a little extra flair when tied around a handbag handle or layered beneath a blazer. Also look great with just a simple white tee and jeans!
+Speaking of white tees: I just ordered this heavily hyped tee from Goldies (a brand I’ve never ordered from – has anyone tried?). You know I love an elevated basic. I usually swear by the ones from SoldOut, but I also still think this $20 tee is insanely high-quality (heavier/thicker/a little more cropped than SoldOut) and I love this $48 shrunken fit style from Buck Mason.
+Speaking of bandana print: how cute is this poplin top?!
+At VB, loving this top and this vest for spring! And some of my favorite dressy sneakers in a new colorway.
+And don’t sleep on their sale section! Always find a few hidden gems in there, like this denim midi and this tweed jacket. Also love this fun statement necklace! I got something similar from Hart last week!
+More CHIC handbags: have you seen J. Crew’s woven/raffia collection?! I LOVE this little bucket (I own and love Sezane’s similar Farrow bag) and this CHIC top-handle style, which brings to mind styles from the designer Chloe.
+REALLY good designer sunglasses on sale, but only a handful of each style left: here, here, here, here (I ordered the pink and love them; these are great for petite faces).
+On the matching bra/underwear note: these underwear, this bralette. The most comfortable things you’ll ever wear, but also sexy and chic. I also discovered a smaller subset of Negative’s line are on sale here!
+A great spring “mom tote” or gym tote or schlep-everything tote — $125 and such fun colors! Love the handles.
+A chic and well priced lidded storage bin for hiding toys and games.
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I realized that a lot of what I associate with glamour I first experienced in my grandparents’ Upper East Side apartment as a kid- an umbrella stand in the entryway. A desk that has nothing to do with a computer and everything to do with handwriting notes with fountain pens on personalized stationary. Decanting orange juice or milk into jugs for the table. Most of this speaks to a specific type of person living a specific lifestyle in a specific place (i.e. urban dwelling retired people in the ’90s!) but I still find myself inspired by it, however different my own life may be.
These are such rich details! Thanks for sharing them. “The desk that has nothing to do with a computer” is such an interesting relic from the past and made me think about the old technologies (or pre-technologies, or analog forms!) that we glamorize now. What else would be on this list? I find myself perhaps bizarrely philistine around things like heated mugs, even electric toothbrushes! xx
A book recommendation – “The Power of Glamour” by Virginia Postrel (2013). I read it many years ago and return to it often.
Oo thank you!! Added to my TBR!
Yes to all these slivers of glamour! A great weekend to unleash my inner glamourpuss, ha!
In the same vein as that VB necklace, have you seen the enamel birthstone charms from Joiana? They’re currently on preorder, and so darling! I couldn’t decide on just one.
I hadn’t seen those but I think that brand is super cute! Which color(s) did you get?
Unleash the glamourpuss!!
xx
Jen! Thank you for the reminder that the Oscar’s are this weekend! My husband and I went to see the Oscar shorts with some friends, and we ended up closing down the restaurant afterwards pulling apart the themes of each one. The discussion was unexpectedly animated and opinionated (in the best way)! So much fun. I would also like to thank you for introducing me to Mary Oliver. I’m waiting to hear back about some medical tests, and reading her poetry is keeping me calm.
Hi Anne! That Oscar shorts night sounds so fun – what a great idea. I love talking movies over a bottle of wine. Actually, Landon and I briefly contemplated starting a blog together along these lines at the beginning of our marriage! HA! Just so fun. We stayed up late last night dissecting “Train Dreams,” which I enjoyed more than he did. I’m still collecting my thoughts. I think my main hang-up was the omniscient narrator — it didn’t work / make sense to me.
I’m so sorry to hear about your medical situation — I know how agonizing the wait is. Sending you so much love and grace. Mary Oliver is a great comfort and soft landing during these pinching times!
xx
Thank you!