By: Jen Shoop

The following content may contain affiliate links. If you make a purchase through the links below, I may receive compensation. Image via.

Pour a frothy cup of coffee and settle in, Magpies – I have never seen so many promotions go live so early! I’ve been following them all and have narrowed down to a couple of true can’t-miss promotions across a few categories. A lot of additional brands are launching their promotions specifically this upcoming Monday (including a popular pajama company…), and I’ll share those as they become available!

Fashion.

WIDE LEG MADEWELL JEANS // FREDA SALVADOR BOOTS // JCREW CARDIGAN // TANK // WOVEN SUN HAT

01. Sold Out NYC — Per my note yesterday, 25% off loads of their virally popular wardrobe basics, but most notably my favorite tees. I own in all the colors and the linen version too. They are ultra-soft, a perfect thin-but-not-sheer weight, and have a tuckable length. I love the slightly boxy shape. You cannot find these on sale for more than 15% off the rest of the year — now’s the time. Start with the basic white tee! (I also love their scoopneck tanks, ultra-luxe “everything shirts,” and cashmere turtlenecks.)

02. Madewell — 30% off sitewide. Consider these wide legs and this chic, tailored vest! I own both!

03. Skims Fits Everybody Crewneck Dress (50% off) — I’ve been contemplating this ever since the ladies at A Thing or Two appointed this “a regrettably worth it” purchase. They insisted it is flattering and comfortable. I’m a new convert to their stretchy, but suck-you-in fitted tees (sadly not included in the sale) and have to say I’m contemplating adding this to my cart.

04. Freda Salvador — 25% off sitewide, in case you missed out on the boot sale! You can still snag them. This sale actually “goes live” on 11/22 but you can get early access here (discount appears in cart). You know I love their loafers!

05. Nike Infinity Runs (and lots of other Nike shoes) — 25% off. I have not been running this month but am dying to try their latest style. I have loved every generation of this shoe — my favorite runner!

06. Dudley Stephens — up to 50% off sitewide. We all love their fleece turtlenecks, and I was so excited to snag one for mini!

07. Janessa Leone — 30% off (discount appears in cart). This sale also goes live in a few days, but you can get early access now. I wore this packable woven sun hat all summer — a really great buy and also a cool gift for a traveler — and their packable hats are generally just so smart and chic.

08. J. Crew — I feel like they may roll out a 50% off deal in the next week, but this cable knit cardigan is on my mind, and I’ve already purchased a bunch of their holiday clothing for my children, as I find especially the novelty dresses (like this, which Emory picked for herself) sell through!

09. Jenni Kayne — Finally splurge on the Cooper!

Beauty.

DAILY MOISTURIZER // IN-SHOWER BALM // PLASMA KIT // EYEBROW PENCILS // HIGHLIGHTER DUO

01. InnBeauty — Up to 30% off the best daily moisturizer. Most people call this a solid “dupe” for Augustinus Bader. My husband and I use this daily!

02. Hanni — early access now through 11/25 if you are an email subscriber: buy 2 products for 20% off, buy 4 products for 30% off, 6 products for 50% off. I’d describe these products as “lazy girl shower care.” I loveee this in-shower balm you apply — gives you the most hydrated, silky skin after you get out. A cool idea for a White Elephant gift exchange, or just something to give all your fellow lazy gal friends.

03. UBeauty — 20% off for new and returning customers with code JENSHOOP. We all love the lip plasma! This little plasma kit would be such a fun gift (already a discount, plus my code gets extra 20% off).

04. Billion Dollar Beauty — 30% off sitewide. I think these ultra-fine-point eyebrow pencils are identical to the Anastasia ones but over 50% less right now. I also love this highlighter duo — very similar to Rare Beauty but maybe a little less pigmented. (And I’m sorry but this whole Marilyn Monroe brows set is so cute!)

Home.

RIFLE PAPER PUZZLE // TARTAN DUVET // FAVORITE PAJAMAS // CUTE GIFT TAGS

01. Rifle Paper — CYBER30 for 30% off. This is a yearly purchase for me: I always stock up on wrapping paper (strongly rec the rolls over the sheets – gives you a lot more flexibility to wrap and not waste paper) and tags (how cute are these?) using their BFCM promotion, which they launched a week early this year. We also already completed this puzzle this month — my kids loved it! Shaped like a snowglobe. Highly giftable. A little spendier, but in the same category — Dear Annabelle has some gorgeous holiday gift tags for 20% off.

02. Petite Plume — 25% off sitewide. My kids’ favorite pajamas, and I am newly obsessed with their seasonal bedding. We have this tartan flannel duvet and these sheets on our bed!

03. Piecework Puzzles — 30% off! Shoot, just ordered a few of these before the promo was live for friends/family, but now might need to order more while discounted.

Two sales I’m on the alert for: Chappywrap and Crown Affair. I have a few gifts I want to buy from both of these retailers and am just waiting to lunge on a good deal! Anything you’re after?

P.S. The Magpie Chic Things gift guide.

P.P.S. “The befores”: reflecting on the time before we had children.

P.P.P.S. Are you ready for Thanksgiving?!

By: Jen Shoop

I re-read Edna St. Vincent-Millay’s poem “Afternoon on a Hill” yesterday morning, finding it tucked into the “Joy” section of my new Bright Poems for Dark Days anthology. I wrote about this exact poem during those early caliginous weeks of the pandemic years ago, when I was surviving each day by searching for one bright spot of color. My scansion at that time focused narrowly on verb choice, something that didn’t even come to the door on yesterday’s reading — another instance in which I find text as malleable as clay — but I was drawn then and now to the lines “I will look at cliffs and clouds / with quiet eyes.” I love this couplet. It captures so well my personal imperative as a writer: to care-ingly,* non-intrusively notice the world. I’ll never forget a podcast interview in which Rick Rubins, celebrated music producer, explained his approach to finding and cultivating new talent. He asks himself, “What’s making me lean forward?” I think this is core to any creative practice — the close looking, the leaning forward, the watching with quiet eyes.

It made me think, too, that there is something about writing that feels like fishing with an ambiguous rod:

you will often net nothing —

but you might reel in a trout, or you might reel in a whale,

and none of it happens without paying attention and casting out.

And God it feels good to fish anyway.

Thinking about this today because a reader wrote me a note a few weeks ago seeking encouragement in her creative undertakings. As she put it: “the wind sort of left my sails as I pondered what am I even doing, as someone who loves writing and sharing visual things I experience with people.” I replied: “I understand too well how those forces you mention can deter you, can unseat you, can leave you disenchanted.  But keep creating!  Keep going!  There is a quote I think about often — “a bird does not sing because it has an answer; it sings because it has a song.”  I return to this as a kind of ethic for writing.  I do not need to know why I write, I do not need to know how it will be received.  It does not need to ask for anything.  It can just be a song.”

And I think somewhere amidst this webbing of thoughts today, I am consolidating a kind of manifesto for my own creativity that might be helpful to writers who find themselves disillusioned:

Shake hands with the blank page daily

Spend most of your time noticing the world, and watch it show up in letters later.

You do not need to know why you write.

Your job is to shape something and send it out into the world; the reader’s job is to determine whether it is successful. Frankly, the latter is none of your business.

All good writing begins with an bad first draft.

Think carefully about what you include and exclude in prose — some things are most powerful left hanging behind the curtains.

If you are uninspired, read something good.

Your writing does not need to ask for anything–in fact, should not ask for anything. It can just be a song.

Post-Scripts.

*Care-ingly is a Mary Oliver-ism.

+More advice on getting started with writing — this one is more tactical.

+Do you consider yourself creative?

+Let them be wrong about you.

Post-Scripts.

The following content may contain affiliate links. If you make a purchase through the links below, I may receive compensation.

+So many incredible sales going on right now. I want to highlight two items I wore yesterday that I am loving — first, my new Freda Salvador Brooke boots. We chatted about these over the weekend, but they are water-resistant suede and have a great, narrow silhouette up top and chic lug sole. J’adore. They are a Freda Salvador bestsellers season after season, and are 25% off through tomorrow only. Can’t rec enough. Did I mention they’re water-resistant suede? So, like, actually practical for sludgy winter weather. I got them in the brown suede — I actually think this color will prove highly versatile and useful. (But I wanted the espresso suede color, which was sold out in my size!) Second, my favorite Kilte cardigan! It’s $50 off as a part of their Black Friday promotion. I am in loveeee with this sweater. It is the softest sweater I own — almost has the feeling of a Barefoot Dreams blanket? — and of course I’m in love with the fair isle motif in those gorgeous blues.

+This tartan skirt!

+Shhhh – I’m not sure when this will go live, but at some point today, a little birdie told me that SoldOut will be launching a Black Friday sale that includes several of their viral, luxe basics (of which, as you know, I am an enormous fan), like their Iconically Soft tee. I have gradually replaced nearly all of my tees with these — the perfect fit, ultra-soft, and a thinner weight that tucks well (but is not burnout / not see through). My other Sold Out favorites: this scoopneck tank (sexy and opaque/a nice thick rib), their Everything Shirt (SOOO luxe — runs very oversized, FYI), and their featherweight cashmere turtleneck. All 25% off!

+Doen launched a second winter collection yesterday. This LBD is gorgeous.

+Stocked up on a few of these holiday sticker books for my daughter — she has loved these since she was maybe 3 years old! Still does!

+SO tempted by this velvet blazer for my son’s Christmas Eve outfit.

+I’ve written about this brand a lot lately, but I have become such a fan girl of Iris and Romeo. I have been using their foundation daily (picking it over Westman!) because I like the gel consistency during these drying winter months. I find it lays beautifully and does not feel at all cakey. I also more or less coerced my sister into trying their concealer — it’s my go-to. It provides a good amount of coverage but has a natural, dewy finish. I love it. I can’t encourage you more to toss a concealer into your cart for your next order! Last but not least, on the days/mornings I don’t want a full face of makeup, I love their Weekend Skin tinted moisturizer — hydrating, evens out skin a little bit, and gives you a great amount of glow. I actually just discovered they have a “warm glow” version (I’d previously used the ‘universal’ color) and ordered it to try.

+The play kitchens from Teamson are so adorable. We bought one for my kids a few Christmases ago and I still find it charming any time I go up to the top floor play room. Great, dramatic Christmas gift.

+Drooling over this Hermes-esque simple leather clutch in the emerald green color.

+Dorsey just launched these really cool lab-grown pendants you can attach to your rivieres for a different, more dramatic, look this fall. I’m intrigued by the emerald and tourmaline. Just something new and different!

+Cutest holiday mugs.

+A propos of today’s post on leaning forward / observing / seeking: this necklace would be such a great gift for a creative. It’s also reminding me of a quote by Louise Gluck: “Anyone who writes is a seeker. You look at a blank page and you’re seeking. The role is assigned to us and never removed. I think this is an unbelievable blessing. I mean, to be seventy-eight years old and still looking–this amazes me.”

+Roz has some really beautiful holiday gift sets — buy this and stow the minis away for your next trip!

+New beauty brand alert: intrigued by these highlighters from Neen, which was just launched by the founder of Stila!

By: Jen Shoop

The following content may contain affiliate links. If you make a purchase through the links below, I may receive compensation.

Sharing a few recent discoveries that were met with EXCLAMATION POINTS on my end —

RIXO DRESS!!! RIXO MAKES DRESSES THAT REALLY MOVE WITH YOUR BODY; I LOVE THE WAY THIS ONE FEELS FESTIVE (HAS TINY METALLIC ORBS ALL OVER IT) BUT COULD BE WORE YEAR-ROUND

I STYLED WITH MY NEW DORSEY EMERALD DROPS — THEY ARE FEATHERWEIGHT AND I LOVE THE LEVERBACK EARRINGS AND VINTAGE VIBE

THE WINTER ROMANCE END-CAP AT POLITICS AND PROSE…THESE SPARKED SUCH JOY! I’LL TAKE ONE OF EACH

RHODE PEPTIDE LIP TINT — SUCH GORGEOUS COLOR (“RASPBERRY JELLY”), AND IT LASTS, AND IS FLAVORLESS; ALSO ENJOYED THIS DELICIOUS COCKTAIL AT THE PENDRY HOTEL BAR IN BALTIMORE

CLOG CORNER — MY ROTHYS (BASICALLY LIVE IN THESE – SUCH GOOD ARCH SUPPORT) — AND THESE FUN CALF-HAIR TECOVAS

ALSO SEEN ABOVE: PETITE PLUME SENT ME A TARTAN FLANNEL DUVET AND IT’S KIND OF THE MOST AMAZING THING EVER; ALREADY PUTTING ME IN THE HOLIDAY MOOD! CURRENTLY 25% OFF!

MY WICKER TREES FROM TARGET, STYLED ON MY GORGEOUS NEW TABLE LINENS FROM HALF PAST SEVEN HOME’S COLLAB WITH MAISON VENU

LO MEIN + PEKING DUCK AT TYSON’S CORNER

VARLEY FLEECE

I LOVE A BOOK WITH A BUILT-IN BOOKMARK — THIS IS BRIGHT POEMS FOR DARK DAYS

MY NEW PARKER THATCH MINI MIMI BAG — ABSOLUTELY ADORABLE

RIFLE PAPER GIFT WRAP — MY FAVORITE; I STOCK UP EVERY YEAR, AND THEY GAVE US A 25% OFF CODE: SHOOP25

What’s been exciting and delighting you recently?

P.S. More holiday outfit ideas.

P.P.S. What music do you listen to while working?

P.P.P.S. Advice for new grandparents (crowd-sourced!)

By: Jen Shoop

“Emily Bronte, author of the greatest psychological novel ever written, with the most complex character ever conceived. Read Wuthering Heights when you’re 18 and you think Heathcliff is a romantic hero; when you’re 30, he’s a monster; at 50, you see he’s just human.”

–Alice Hoffman, from an interview with The New York Times

I have been writing a lot recently about the way texts change according to what we bring to them in a given year, on a given day, at a given hour. Even the preceding sentence could not have been written a few decades ago, back when I was in the grip of “right versus wrong” as a young student. I remember reading Roland Barthes’ “The author is dead” as a first-year in college and fighting it with absolutely every cell in my body. The author had something to say and it was my job to pan for its narrow meanings, carefully embedded in the streambed — to separate the gold from the silt. It was wildly destabilizing to imagine otherwise.

The problem, when I encountered Barthes all those years ago, was that it was all conceptual at that point. I hadn’t been alive long enough to read and re-read a text with significant personal changes in my life unfolding between the drumbeats, and so I couldn’t greet his provocation with experience one way or the other. I didn’t yet know that we are more like verbs than nouns — inciting movement rather than reflecting stasis. Now I know, and on a visceral level, that texts do change over time. They are more like mirrors than murals. The meanings are not hieroglyphed in stone by a mastermind. They emerge in fluid conversation with our own experiences.

I loved Hoffman’s thoughts on Bronte; they echo the many complex ways I have interacted with Louisa May Alcott’s Little Women over the years, both as a book and in its two powerful adaptations to film. Little Women is simultaneously —

A love story

A portrait of grief

An examination of the complex dynamics of sisterhood

A bildungsroman

A feminist critique

A reflection on the intersection of art and commerce

An artist’s way

An artifact of post-Reconstruction-era realism and American Protestant virtues

And probably many more things — the list is, in all likelihood, infinite. And each time I visit with it, I find myself focusing on a different part of the stereogram. I am not a frequent book repeater (are you? I found the comments on this post on the subject fascinating), but there are certain texts that just howl after you, and Little Women is one of them, likely because each of the readings above speaks profoundly to my own interests and personal trajectories.

Wondering today if you have a text, like Wuthering Heights for Hoffman or Little Women for me, that continues to give you new sky each time you visit with it — what is it? What are some of the new readings that have emerged over time?

Post-Scripts.

+The three best books I read this year: Kingsolver’s Demon Copperhead (my review here); Elena Ferrante’s My Brilliant Friend (my review here); and Sally Rooney’s Intermezzo (scattershot thoughts here; I never wrote a full review of this one, partly because I found it so sprawlingly suggestive and am frankly still collecting my thoughts).

+Good advice on writing, and on living, really: take it bird by bird. (Plus some other reflections on reading and writing.)

+How to get started with writing.

+We are in a constant state of rewriting.

Shopping Break.

The following content may contain affiliate links. If you make a purchase through the links below, I may receive compensation.

+I just noticed that Laura Dern narrates the Audible version of Little Women and added it to my library. I can’t wait to interact with the text in this mode. (And Laura Dern…! Marmee!). Also, Joanne Froggat of Downton Abbey fame narrates Wuthering Heights, so I also downloaded that one.

+I am totally obsessed with this cropped fleece half-zip. I broke it out for ice skating with my kids this past weekend and it is so soft and warm, and I love the length and details (those gold side zips!). They also have a longer length variation that would be perfect for pairing with leggings to cover the rear. I went down to an XXS in mine — runs boxy. (And if you’re not sure you like the cinched waist, Everlane has a really chic similar option with straighter lines.)

+Cute surprise for your children’s lunchboxes.

+Thanks to a Magpie reader for “raising the bat [magpie] signal” (in her words) to let me know that Madewell had launched a collab with Leset!!! You know I obsess over their pointelle. These sets are divine.

+DRMTLGY has been targeted me with ads for its undereye corrector (probably my biggest cosmetic woe) and I am very tempted to order it while 30% off…has anyone tried?

+If you loved the G. Label leather skirt I wore back in Italy (so many of you loved this look!), this is a great look for less.

+And if you love the Julia Amory ball skirts but are looking for something a little less expensive, Free People has a really chic, fire engine red option at more of a tea/midi length out.

+A great innovation for freezing leftovers. My husband loves this for freezing stock.

+A demure, elegant last minute option for Thanksgiving if you’re heading somewhere more traditional.

+More great fair isle – I really like the colors in this one because it works with so many colors — taupe, gray, black, white — but would also be fun to play against a bright red or chartreuse. Look for less with this!

+Intrigued by this “lip oasis” treatment. My lips and hands have been SO DRY the past few weeks. I have been liberally applying this lip mask, which I love, and L’Occitane’s iconic hand cream (which is truly incredible — my mom always gives this to my Dad, whose hands are perpetually dry, in his stocking).

+Cute, inexpensive velvet flats to pair with your holiday lineup. These remind me of Aeyde’s Uma but a fraction of the price. For something glitzier, try these Larroudes (in my closet!). And while we’re talking velvet footwear, I love these Ann Mashburns!

By: Jen Shoop

The following content may contain affiliate links. If you make a purchase through the links below, I may receive compensation.

Over the weekend, I read Monica’s essay on how French mothers dress their children, and found it very interesting. You might recall that I went through a battle of the wills with my daughter a few years ago once she decided she was summarily “over” the hair bows and smocked dresses of her toddler years. Ultimately, she wanted to wear what her friends were wearing, and also to express herself, and I decided this was not a hill I wanted to die on. In fact, I’ve now become radicalized in my position and feel that this is an important way to empower her, and show that I respect her point of view. (I also dwelt on an incident from my own awkward early teen years in which my mother had insisted I wear “tennis whites” to a tennis clinic I participated in at my high school the week before I was starting there as a freshman. I was all pins and needles already, sloping body language and wide eyes, and of course I arrived in knee-length white shorts and a pique polo and noticed much to my cheek-reddening horror that every other girl was wearing Soffe shorts and a Gonzaga or Georgetown Prep t-shirt (two boys schools in our area). I am, in other words, empathetic to wanting to dress to fit in, or at least feel comfortable in a setting. It’s OK, Mom, though – I’ve gotten over this and now write about fashion week in and week out so it all comes out in the wash…!)

Anyway, one big surprise for me as I’ve engaged my daughter in choosing what she wants to wear is how often she wants to dress just like a little version of me. I would absolutely wear a version of the outfit above and in fact think the way she styled the socks with the boots very fashion-forward / I would not necessarily have thought to suggest this?! She has some serious sock game, again reminding me of my own age — it feels like every generation younger than me knows how to wear a good sock, and we’re still stuck in no-show territory. She was wearing this Gap fair isle, this Old Navy cord skirt, these Zara socks, and these J. Crew boots. She put the outfit together on her own.

But, thought I’d share this insight in case you’re stuck with what to buy your daughter — you might contemplate where to find smaller versions of what you’re gravitating towards (in different colors, perhaps). I often get stuck when I’m thinking on the whole about “what to buy my daughter for fall” — it’s almost too much, and I get lost. In the end, this year, I began to think about the pieces I was into — corduroy, fair isle, flare/wide leg jeans, pointelle — and finding cute versions for her came to the fore.

Anyway, I did spend some time shopping with and for her over the weekend. She picked this dress for Thanksgiving (I did narrow down the list to a few options, and she was enthusiastic about that one); these flared pants and this athletic tee for ice skating (both 40% off! — she also has the flared pants from Athleta in a different color and loves those…I sometimes need to run a mid-week load of laundry so she can re-wear as she pleases); and this fleece in the ice blue color as a top layer for skating (40% off!). Back to the skating outfit for a minute: one other tip I’ve picked up over many years of buying way too much clothing for my kids: always have an outfit in mind. It’s dangerous to buy a separate with no tee/top specifically designated to match or work with it, and I find my daughter likes to replicate “whole looks,” e.g., she’ll usually wear the same tee with the same pants, because she thinks it goes together. This simplifies a lot of things for everyone. Specifically, when I bought her the flared Athleta pants (she’d been asking for flared leggings for awhile), I bought an Athleta sweatshirt that worked with them and she likes now to wear them together, and it gives a coordinated vibe.

Anyway, some of the other adorable pieces I found while shopping around for and with her this weekend, not all of which “passed the Emory test,” by the way —

DOEN DRESS // PAJAMAS // HER THANKSGIVING DRESS // SKI JACKET // JCREW BOOTS // CORD SKIRT // ATHLETIC TEE

+I thought this, this, and this would be so sweet for Thanksgiving. She said “nope” to the first two and “I like longer dresses” to the last. Then I just let her browse the entire La Coqueta site and she picked this happily.

+She would definitely wear this but I decided she has enough splurgey knitwear for the moment.

+Her holiday pajama lineup: Petite Plume (her favorite sleepwear brand – she really loves to wear the pajama pants with an old t-shirt of mine on top; the material is very soft/brushed and not itchy); Lake; Burts Bees.

+We are debating going skiing over New Year’s but right now it’s been so warm we’re feeling like it’s optimistic to expect Deep Creek Lake will have enough (or any) snow by then…but, I did pick up some new thermals just in case (50% off). Her Reima ski jacket and ski bibs (currently 25% off!! grab now!) still fit so we’re good there. While we’re here: I’ve heard the Reima all-in-one snowsuits are excellent, and one mom specifically mentioned it prevents that situation where snow gets down their pants when they fall. I also have a friend who is an avid skier and takes her kids skiing a lot each season, and she insists the most important part of taking kids skiing is making sure they are warm and dry the entire time, so the shoe seems to fit. We are sporadic skiers ourselves but I do think I’d invest in the snowsuit if we ended up going more often.

+In general, though, my daughter runs hot and is always begging to shed layers. For this reason, I know any vest will languish in her closet. But this would be SO cute.

Please share any of your own thoughts and insights on getting your seven, eight, nine year old daughter dressed! I generally think this age is tricky to shop for. They’ve outgrown toddler sizing, and a lot of my favorite brands stop at 6X. What’s left can sometimes feel too mature, or very glittery-hot-pink-smiley-face-centric. How and where do you shop for this age group?

P.S. An essay on seeing my daughter at all her ages. This one makes me weepy.

P.P.S. My daughter has amblyopia — but more importantly, a forbearance that far outstrips my own.

P.P.P.S. Motherhood is a surfeit.

By: Jen Shoop

Image via.

This morning, visiting with the wise words of others — each time I skim through this post, I think of Shakespeare: “philosophy is adversity’s sweet milk.” (Comments are also a gold mine!)

This post has been modestly edited from its original version, published in November of 2021.

****

Do you have phrases you’ve picked up along the way that make you feel better? Words you repeat to yourself on bad days, in trying times, on those inevitable afternoons where somehow you’re stranded without a ride and it starts to rain and you have no umbrella? I’m thinking specifically of an afternoon of torrential downpour in Manhattan where I went to pick mini up from school and she immediately wiped out on the slick streets and, as I then carried her crying through the rain, stupidly decided it would be best to get in a cab back uptown, and then we sat in gridlocked traffic for thirty minutes and made it one avenue, so I jumped out and ran with mini through the storm to the nearest subway stop — Penn Station — which is basically the closest approximation to Hell I can imagine, especially on a rainy day, and the 1 platform was about as far as physically possible from where we entered the station, and when we arrived, we did not realize that the 1 track was being shared with the 7 line and got onto the wrong train after waiting 14 minutes and had to stop and switch at another stop and oh, God.

Today, I’m sharing a string of “footholds,” as I’ve come to think of them — perches I use when I need to marshal my energy on particularly tempestuous or stressful days.

“Focus on me, not on the storm.” (The prayer I repeated to myself over and over during my second c-section. Saying those words, I actually felt my vision focus, as if I was being drawn into a narrow corridor, and the scariness around me blurred into the periphery. More on this here.)

“It is not the strongest of the species that survive, nor the most intelligent, but the one most responsive to change.” (This is by Charles Darwin and I think of it often, especially in parenting matters, where I aspire to be the green reed that bends rather than the mighty oak that snaps in the storm. Parenting has required, for me, a continuous openness to changing course, tinkering, re-evaluating what’s working and what’s not. The same is true in my experience with entrepreneurship. Mr. Magpie told me early on “What works for your first 100 customers won’t work for your next 100” — meaning that things change as you scale and you must be adaptable.)

“These are the days that must happen to you.” -Walt Whitman (Always helps me poke my head up over the crest and realize that there is more ahead. More here.)

“The only way out is through.” (Wrote about this here.)

“When we worry about things, we end up living them twice.”

“Things must end to begin again.” I’ve always been bad at endings. These words brings me peace.

“We were together; I forget the rest.” -Walt Whitman (actually an abridgment of his words, but I prefer the concision). Whenever I think on these words, I zoom way out of whatever’s in front of me and realize how insignificant the details will be in a matter of days or weeks. Eventually, I will only remember being with my loved ones.

“Onward!”

“Not everything that weighs you down is yours to carry.” Helpful to perform a loose accounting of what’s on my mind and to let go of the things outside of my purview.

“One more minute.” I borrowed this from a mantra a Magpie reader shared in the comments section on this Getting-to-Know-You post, and I love it. I reminds me not to get caught up in the long road ahead. It also helps when I am at my wit’s end in parenting matters, or when I was massively pregnant and uncomfortable.

“If you understood how frequently people cope by projecting, you’d learn to take absolutely nothing personally.” – Octavia Butler. Ultra-helpful when reeling from a tense situation with friends/loved ones. I find these words also remind me to lead with empathy and think through what might be going on beneath the hood.

“People will kill you over time, and how they’ll kill you is with tiny, harmless phrases, like ‘be realistic.’” -Dylan Moran. I have in fact been surrounded by more patrons than detractors my entire life but there have still been moments where I have warmed my hands around this sentiment and gone boldly in a different direction.

“If all were rain and never sun, No bow could span the hill; If all were sun and never rain, There’d be no rainbow still.” -Christina Rossetti. Cheesy but true — brighter days ahead only appreciable by contrast.

“Beyond a wholesome discipline, be gentle with yourself.” – Max Ehrmann, part of his incredible “Desiderata.” I have especially taken this to heart over the past two years, after realizing I sometimes speak to myself with a somewhat nasty tone of voice!

“It is better to fail in originality than to succeed in imitation.” – Herman Melville. Giddy up! Muscle through those hard days! Persist!

What about you? What words give you the boost you need to make it through the blahs, the grays, the darks?

Post-Scripts.

+Favorite literary quotes.

+On chasing my would-be husband.

+A bit of fiction.

Shopping Break.

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+Black Friday deals are starting to roll in fast and furious. I just ordered my daughter one of these Dudley Stephens fleeces while 40% off (discount appears in cart) and this dress I wore to Mass yesterday is now 40% off (again, discount appears in cart).

+Gap has some great new arrivals. Eyeing one of these cashsoft ribbed knit sets (I really liked traveling to/from Italy in this similar set from Tuckernuck), this lace midi skirt (Gap, is that you?!), and this gorgeous knit dress. While there: these are my favorite sweats for both of my kids. They’re ultra-soft, well-made, come in good colors, and I like the retro fit. I have to say that I splurged for a few years on spendy sweats for my daughter and they did not hold up well in the laundry…these are much better.

+Back to cashmere for a minute, Quince just launched a wide range of new cashmere pieces, including these straight-fit cashmere pants, which come in fantastic colors. Their best-selling cashmere joggers are also back in stock!

+This is such a cool necklace to layer in with your usual stack — it reminded me of the Jane Win coin necklace I wore a lot a few seasons ago (now I seem to mainly wear my Dorsey stack for no reason other than that I sleep and shower in them and basically never have to mess with taking them on or off) but the M.G. one is less expensive. I like the motif of “the seeker,” too. A meaningful pendant for any creative, curious, thoughtful person.

+We just bought this chic step ladder! Somehow across our moves in the past few years, we lost our tall step ladder. I was kind of thrilled by the excuse to buy a more design-forward option.

+I am SO excited – I see Sturgill Simpson perform live this week! He’s one of our all-time favorite Sunday morning listens. I love his album “The Ballad of Dood and Juanita” — sung story-telling at its finest. The one about his dog, “Sam,” is so simple and moving. Anyway, I’m excited for the opportunity to break in my new boots and a dress…I just received this and debating whether to keep or not but it’d be perfect for this moment. I also just received this but it feels a bit too dressy? I think I might need to search my closet for an old Doen (I have this in a different pattern that might work well) to wear instead.

+I’ve been on the hunt for more wide leg jeans to wear this winter, because I like the way they look paired with a cowboy boot (I often wear my Isabel Marant Duertos, but my new Tecovas will also be worked into the rotation), and sometimes you REALLY NEED A PAIR OF SOCKS AND BOOTS, which are honestly difficult to style with the barrel jeans we all have. I feel like they never look quite right — and look more flattering paired with a ballet flat. I really like the fit of the VB Taylors (I have this colorway already) and might buy this lighter wash pair as well. (N.B. for fellow petites: both of these pairs have a raw edge hem so you can just cut them to your desired length and they still work great.). But I ordered these Rag and Bones to test as well.

+What are you wearing for Thanksgiving? After much debate, I’m wearing this lace number; mini is wearing this La Coqueta (currently 25% off and a good buy as you can also bend it into holiday / Christmas attire — doesn’t read too “fall”), and micro is wearing cords, this fair isle, and a button-down. (BTW, J. Crew has some really great vintage-inspired knits on super sale, like this fair isle, which is similar to my son’s but $29!)

+Back to Doen: did you see their collab with one of my favorite beauty brands, RMS?

+Aurate is running a 35% off promotion — I actually might pick up these gemstone earrings and how sweet is this bow necklace? Tiffany vibes but under $100 (at the moment).

+A really chic gift for an MIL who plays bridge or any card game.

+Fun luxe gifts for White Elephant style gift exchanges: Hermes nail polish and Chanel lip balm. The packaging alone!

By: Jen Shoop

I’m a new subscriber to Maya C. Popa’s Poetry Today Substack — what a treat to open my inbox when my creativity is waning and find a curation of verse. I’m a philistine reader, though, and will skim until my attention snags. This week, I lingered over “The Doe,” by C.K. Williams, and then its sentiments followed me around all afternoon.

At first, I couldn’t figure out why it struck me so hard. On a purely conceptual level, I related to the insight that visitations with the natural world can attenuate the discomfort of the soul — not erase or absolve, just lessen, for a time, the intensity. Wendell Berry captured this sentiment cogently in his poem “The Peace of Wild Things,” and Mary Oliver’s entire body of work could be summarized along the same lines. So there was this, and perhaps I needed the reminder to get out of my head and into the world, and this is why I felt like “a bell, awakened” (Denise Levertov, “Variation on a Theme by Rilke,” also included in Maya’s roundup this week) as I read the words.

But there was something else, too, and this gets to one of the countless reasons why we read: a text can be many things all at once. It is a squid, pumping blood from many hearts. Because I couldn’t stop thinking about the phrase “I in disquiet and dismay / for the suffering of someone I loved” and the visual of the doe “in her always incipient alarm.” I related to both, and profoundly, all at once. I was reading the poem like a one-person play, attaching myself to each mask, and connecting it all to the fact that a friend of mine lost her mother this week. She had flown up to be with her less than a week ago, and seemed to know that the end was near, and I would find myself thinking of her while brushing my teeth, and opening my car door, and waiting with my son while my daughter completed her guitar lesson, and doing all these normal things while my friend was living out a week of unimaginable losing.

I have no answer for this absurd asymmetry. And it feels like a paltry offering to be writing about poetry today. But just to say that sometimes I have needed the crutch of other words to understand myself, to look squarely in the mirror and see the shape of what I am feeling.

And what a gift to find the right ones at the right moment —

Onward —

****

Words I read and loved this week:

“Writing is hard work. A clear sentence is no accident.” — William Zinsser

“The day’s blow / rang out, metallic–or it was I, a bell awakened, / and what I heard was my whole self /
saying and singing what it knew: I can.” — Denise Levertov

“The silver loneliness / of moonlight.” – Edwin Arlington Robinson

“But I would go to London once or twice a week in a wild, escalation passion of frustration, blinded by some mysterious mixture of guilt, moroseness, and desire. I wasn’t after women, but something invisible, something I never found…all of this leading up to — in fact nothing more than an elaborate ritualized introduction to — the drive home at three a.m. in my Jaguar. The drive home was the point of it all.” -Frank Conroy, Stop-Time*

*I guess Mr. Conroy and I are on speaking terms.

****

Sunday Shopping Poetry…

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Above: My recent book order.

Below: Freda Salvador’s best-selling Brooke boots (waterproof!) are on sale for 25% off with code BROOKEBOOT25. The sale opens to the public tomorrow, so grab yours now before colors sell out! I ordered the brown suede because espresso suede had already sold out in my size! // The ultra-chic Lilly Sisto just launched a collection with Dillard’s — the styles are so her. I love this tweed dress and these satin kitten heels. // Mille launched its holiday collection, and it’s full of interesting new styles and shapes in festive colors and motifs (15% off sitewide with JEN15). I love this sweater and this emerald jacket. // YSE’s new lip mask is addictive. I keep it on my desk drawer and apply it compulsively. // Apparis has a cute selection of faux-fur cold weather accessories — love these earmuffs and these mittens. // I ordered this wool-blend vest to pair with holiday trousers. Under $120! // Love these not-too-dramatic bowed leg jeans from Pistola.

MILLE SWEATER // YSE LIP MASK // MADEWELL VEST // PISTOLA LEXI JEANS // APPARIS EARMUFFS // FREDA SALVADOR BROOKE BOOTS (25% OFF WITH BROOKEBOOT25) // STOP-TIME BY FRANK CONROY

On the Madewell vest front, I included this in my list of tops to wear with statement skirts / pants this holiday season, but here’s a specific approach to styling —

MADEWELL VEST // BODEN VELVET TROUSERS (UPGRADE PICK: LA LIGNE // LOOK FOR LESS ZARA) // LIZZIE FORTUNATO EARRINGS // HERMES LIPSTICK // NOEUS BAG // NOEUS MULES (LOOK FOR LESS HERE)

By: Jen Shoop

Image via. The following content may contain affiliate links. If you make a purchase through the links below, I may receive compensation.

+BAD BOOK GIRLS: I loved the thoughtful and vulnerable comments on this post about being “a bad book girl,” and especially the way Deborah started her note: “From one bad book girl to another…” and finished it:

“Eventually I went to graduate school and studied English and became a professor. That—and literary theory—sort of gave me permission to read as I liked. And so I do.

I think I too am a bad reader—for how and what I read, for my escapism, for my late nights with my kindle while my sweet husband sleeps next to me (definitely not the husband referred to earlier)..But bad reading is one of the defining tropes of my life.

So I say, give yourself grace in this too and also in how you approach writing. Follow that self constructed maze as you like. It’s your life’s work and as a fellow bad reader-and bad gurl, really—I know you’re doing it right.”

Wow! It made me think even more critically about the rules, or rubrics, I’m observing even as I pursue my own ways and reasons to read, and write, for that matter. I saw Kacey Musgraves perform in Baltimore last weekend and I’m riding high on her “follow your arrow” mantra — it’s all of a piece, isn’t it?

We all have permission to be “bad book girls” — whether that means reading against the grain, reading “lowbrow,” reading on a Kindle, reading BRADs, reading slowly, reading quickly, repeat reading, reading things others have put down as “tripe” or “down market” or “smut” or any of the other creative terms people use to look down their noses at certain categories of text. I have a good friend who is wickedly smart — has pushed me to think more carefully about nearly everything in my life — and she is almost always reading BRADs, while keeping a side-car “serious book” that she makes her way through just so that when people ask her: “What are you reading?”, she’ll have a honest, palatable answer that fits her “book girl” persona in certain company. I completely empathize with this. Fellow bad book girl, though why do we occasionally need to hide in secret?

+MOTHER TO MOTHER LOVE: I loved this post from writer Ellie Hughes — more to add to our growing “A Million Ways to Say I Love You” Project. “I hear you, it’s such a tough stage.” Yes — I have leaned on these intimacies to muddle through.

+STREET STYLE PERFECTION: Deeply inspired by this look on model Linh Niller.

+THE NUTCRACKER LOUNGE: In what has become Magpie Reader Core Culture, many of us talk about the magic of “the nutcracker lounge,” or a cozy corner of the home that we transform into a hygge, holiday-centric wonderland during the winter months. The idea was conceived of by Magpie reader Kelly, who wrote, when asked what she loves about winter: “Every winter we cover out outdoor couch in faux fur blankets and set out a tray of candles, my husband calls it the “Nutcracker Lounge.”” Kelly sent me a photo of their NL over the weekend, and I asked if I could include it here — how charming!?

+FOR A LAUGH: Poking fun at the challenging-to-pronounce names in fashion. My best friend and I have been texting about “Noiii Balanche” since — once you hear it, you’ll never not.

+COOL GIRL BELT: I feel like I’ve been seeing this Dehanche Hollyhock belt EVERYWHERE recently (image below via) and it’s such a chic statement — slightly Western, slightly edgy, very luxe. It’s currently 20% off when you add to cart. I’m eyeing one for myself…brown suede or black leather?!

+LAST DAY OF THE HILL HOUSE SALE: Today is the final day to get 30% off at Hill House with code EVERYTHING30. An ideal time to pick up a last-minute dress for Thanksgiving, or a tartan for your holiday party lineup (I own the latter in a longer version that’s now sold out).

+EYEING + BUYING:

A CHERRY RED PUFFER JACKET // THE CHICEST SWEATER I’VE SEEN THIS SEASON // ABSOLUTELY STUNNING VERONICA BEARD GOWN // BEEN SPOTTING THIS DEHANCHE BELT EVERYWHERE — CURRENTLY 20% OFF WHEN ADDED TO CART // A CHIC STOCKING STUFFER // CUTE AND INEXPENSIVE HOLIDAY JAMMIES // A CLEVER ACTIVITY CHART FOR KIDS

+BESTSELLERS: This Varley sweatshirt — so good — but I can’t recommend the matching pants in the 25″ slim cuff style for fellow petites more! LOVE them. So flattering and a perfect fit.

01. VARLEY SWEATSHIRT // 02. UGG SLIPPERS (YOU JUST HAVE TO) // 03. JEWEL BUTTON CARDIGAN // 04. MY NEW SHOWERING OBSESSION (BEST $8 YOU’LL SPEND THIS MONTH) // 05. CROWN AFFAIR DRY SHAMPOO (THE GOAT) // 06. QUINCE SUEDE SHOPPER (LOOKS LIKE METIER, BUT COSTS $150) // 07. MY FAV CASHMERE CARDIGAN ($159!) // 08. CASHMERE CARDIGAN // 09. SOREL BOOTS // 10. J. CREW SEQUIN DRESS // 11. HILL HOUSE JACKET // 12. J. CREW SWEATER

By: Jen Shoop

The following content may contain affiliate links. If you make a purchase through the links below, I may receive compensation.

A DAY IN BALTIMORE: J. MCLAUGHLIN JACKET // SKIMS TEE // MOTHER HALF PIPE JEANS // MANSUR GAVRIEL BAG // HEAVEN MAYHEM KNOT EARRINGS // MARGAUX BALLET FLATS

KACEY MUSGRAVES CONCERT (OMG): ALIX OF BOHEMIA DRESS // LA LIGNE CROPPED DENIM SHIRT // JANESSA LEONE PACKABLE FEDORA // ISABEL MARANT DUERTO BOOTS // HEAVEN MAYHEM KNOT EARRINGS // CELINE PHONE SLING

DINNER WITH MY PARENTS: ANN MASHBURN HABOTAI SHIRTDRESS // VERONICA BEARD DASH BAG // ISABEL MARANT DUERTO BOOTS // LIZZIE FORTUNATO EARRINGS // DORSEY COCKTAIL RING

MORNING DROP OFF AND ERRANDS: VARLEY BETTY SWEATSHIRT // VARLEY SLIM CUFFED PANTS // TARGET SOCKS // ADIDAS SNEAKERS // BODEN WHIPSTITCH WRAP COAT // MANSUR GAVRIEL BAG // DANA REBECCA EARRINGS

UP CLOSE SHOTS OF THESE BEAUTIFUL DIAMOND CROSSOVER HUGGIES

STANDARD WORK AND MOM LIFE: ALIX OF BOHEMIA BLOUSE // KILTE WRAP CARDIGAN // DORSEY EARRINGS // AGOLDE 90s PINCH WAIST JEANS // CHANEL FLATS // MANSUR GAVRIEL BAG

MEETING + STANDARD WORK/MOM LIFE: HEAVEN MAYHEM EARRINGS // SEZANE CHRISTIE BLAZER // SOLDOUT NYC CASHMERE TURTLENECK // PISTOLA CORDS // MARGAUX FLATS // MANSUR GAVRIEL BAG

LUNCH WITH MY PARENTS: SEZANE SHIRT // AGOLDE RILEY JEANS // MANSUR GAVRIEL BAG // FREDA SALVADOR LOAFERS // HEAVEN MAYHEM EARRINGS // LATER ADDED THIS SEZANE BLAZER

BRUNCH + DRIVING BACK FROM BALTIMORE: LA LIGNE ISADORA JEANS // LA LIGNE MINI MARIN SWEATER // MANSUR GAVRIEL BAG // MARGAUX BALLET FLATS

By: Jen Shoop

Image via.

Earlier this week, I wrote glancingly about Suleika’s concept of energy multipliers, or the small things we can do when recovering, or warding off gloominesses or desperations of various kinds. What a great prompt for today — what gives you good energy when you need it?

Small things that turn the lights up for me:

Mailbox walk*

Reading something brief that never fails to inspire me — Seamus Heaney’s Nobel Prize acceptance speech, Patti Smith’s essay on failure, F. Scott’s short fiction, poetry by Elizabeth Bishop or Mary Oliver, musings by Margaret Renkl

Drinking a very tall, very cold glass of water in big gulps and then refilling it

Talking to Landon, my mother, or one of my siblings

Standing on my back patio without my phone, watching for the movement of trees and birds (and occasionally foxes)

Adding to my TBR pile — just the promise of reading something new is enough

Pursuing sonder — recently learned this word — specifically by texting my sisters or sister-friends to find out what’s happening in their worlds; such a good way to remind myself of my own smallness

Putting on the softest clothing I own

Drinking “a clever cup of tea”

Going for a windows-down drive with either no music or very loud music from the 90s — Cranberries, Nirvana, Alanis Morrisette, Celine Dion

Having a good, long sit outside

Taking care of myself as though sick or injured — moving slowly, brewing tea, taking rests

If feeling dysregulated, listening to WETA Classical or Apple’s Spa playlist; if feeling fatigued or uninspired, I use one of my weird, character-oriented writing playlists

Changing lanes — if I’m burnt out on a parenting matter, taking a break to do something for myself, or to write; if I’m in a creative rut, closing up shop early to sit with my children

Reminding myself that everything is a flowing — that this, too, shall pass

****

*I wanted to call out the art of the mailbox walk. Our street dead-ends at a mailbox, and it takes about one minute to walk to it from our front door. Whenever we have an important item to deposit in the mail — a check, a signed form — or just want the excuse, Landon and I will ask one another: “Mailbox walk?” And it means two minutes to stretch our legs and walk in companionable silence or make 40-year-old comments on the trees, or weather, or state of our neighbors’ lawns. Most of the time, though, we extend the walk and wander around our neighborhood — especially when we are upset, or processing, or trying to figure something out. But it starts with the low-commitment one-minute walk to the mailbox, and it expands organically from there. There is a saying: you should spend ten minutes outside every day, unless you’re upset–in which case, you should spend an hour outside. This aphorism demonstrates its organic truth on these mailbox walks, as I can often measure the severity of our moods, or the weight of whatever we are unpacking together, by how long we meander past the mailbox. There are many known traditions and cultures of wayfaring, and even these small excursions without any set endpoint or duration objective make me think that the nomads have a spiritual edge on the rest of us.

What would you put on your own list of energy multipliers?

Post Scripts.

+Beyond a wholesome discipline, be gentle with yourself.

+What I thought of things back when I was turning 34. Interesting to revisit with six years intervening.

+What mattered to me at 18 (almost none of which matters to me now).

Shopping Break.

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+I’d been eyeing these cushioned standing mats from House of Noa for our kitchen sink forever and the current promotion (20% off sitewide with code BFCM24) nudged me over the edge. My mom has one and I’m always obsessed with it. Can’t wait for mine to arrive!

+Totally obsessed with this structured black velvet mini from Tuckernuck. The skirt part has structure/boning to it so it creates a fashion forward silhouette. Love! Will pair with patterned tights and black platforms.

+I don’t know what it is, but I can never stop buying pens. This is in my cart.

+Built-in bling.

+I mentioned this recently, but J. Crew Factory has cute, traditional holiday outfit options for little kids at reasonable prices (lots of tartans!). I got my son this shirt and these tartan-lined pants. J. Crew also has great options. My daughter selected this for herself! And how adorable is this cardigan?!

+Fun scardigans (scarf + cardigan) here!

+Want these tree candles for my holiday table.

+I have become such a fangirl of Ann Mashburn this year. I have one Magpie, Sarah (hi Sarah!), who has been signing the Mashburn praises for YEARS now and I am embarrassed to say I’m finally catch up. I really love their catalogs. Their fall one had the most beautiful and stirring photography, and I would later learn the models styled throughout were married, which explained the chemistry! Anyhow, I am obsessed with the elegance and sophistication of dresses like this and this…!

+My linen closet is in a state of major disarray. Contemplating ordering these to whip things back into shape.

+Julia Amory recently raved about this Chanel highlighter and of course now I want it, too.

+Today only, Parker Thatch is offering $100 off orders over $500. If you’ve been waiting to snag one of their Charlie bags (which I own in camel suede), the time is now!

+I always keep a few boxes of these to give as hostess gifts!

+Well-priced teak shower bench. A girl’s got to shave!

+Pretty travel vanity bag for a good price.

By: Jen Shoop

The following content may contain affiliate links. If you make a purchase through the links below, I may receive compensation. Image via Doen.

If you also bought the Boden wide leg velvet trousers, or the Julia Amory silk dupioni ones, or have a fabulous holiday skirt like this or this in mind, a few suggestions as to what to wear on top:

For dressier moments (cocktail parties):

+Doen’s Madeline top — also love their Pascal, seen above, but only a few left!;

+This $29 satin Gap top (!!! love the sweet bows);

+A tuxedo-style button-down like this or this;

+Julia Amory’s Blair Dupioni tops;

+A sequin shell;

+A top with dramatic cuffs;

+This embellished Self-Portrait, or this one;

+A corset;

+A wool blend vest like this;

+An off-the-shoulder top like this;

+A textured polka dot top.

For festive daytime (teas, brunches, etc):

+An asymmetrical knit like this;

+A metallic turtleneck;

+A cardigan with jeweled buttons (where with nothing beneath and top few buttons undone; tuck in at waist);

+A ribbon embellished cardigan;

+A ruched jersey top;

+An embellished knit like this or this.

For shoes, I really loves these looks with a velvet platform (splurge, somewhere in the middle, save).

By the way, I had pre-scheduled yesterday’s post before I knew about Shopbop’s just-launched designer sale (loads of designer pieces discounted, plus an extra 10% off with code EXTRA10). I’m always hunting for my VB blazers at a discount — you might consider adding this or this to your wardrobe! (I own and treasure both.) Also an incredible time to snag one of these spectacular gowns from Bernadette — obsessed with this and this — for an upcoming formal event. Last but not least, a few of my favorite denim brands and styles are included, like SLVRLAKE’s Grace fit (such a cool wash) and Agolde’s Pinch Waists.

P.S. More festive dressing here.

P.P.S. “Do you still hang your words in the air?”

P.P.P.S. On maintaining wonder in motherhood.


By: Jen Shoop

The following content may contain affiliate links. If you make a purchase through the links below, I may receive compensation.

CROWN AFFAIR HAIR CARE SET // CHIC SET OF MATCHES // MINI VOTIVES // CHIC COUPES // CASHMERE SWEATSHIRT // LAKE PAJAMAS // COFFEE MAKER // PRETTY NOTEBOOK

Sharing a tailored gift guide this afternoon of a few chic things I would love to buy for loved ones in my life this year. As always, I strive to keep most of these suggestions under $100 with a handful of outliers. I have also been trying to keep this gift shelf on my ShopMy page up to date with options!

01. Crown Affair Hair Care Set. The cutest bundle of some of my all-time favorite hair products, at a good price point (under $50; it already sold out at Sephora, sadly). I bought this for two girlfriends already, and might bundle with the Crown Affair hair towel for a sister, too. The towel is a total gamechanger. I’ve tried a few of these quick dry hair towels, but the design of this one with the elastic in the back to tuck the towel ends into is nothing short of genius. A woman had to have designed this. This brand is SO GOOD. I’m addicted to the dry shampoo — I use it to extend my Glamsquad blowouts by an extra day or two.

02. Speaking of, for the woman who has everything, a Glamsquad gift card. $60 covers an at-home blowout. Mom, pretend you didn’t see this, but this is one of my top contenders for a gift for you. Who doesn’t love a blowout in the comfort of her own home or a pre-paid makeup application for a special event?

03. I had one of these dad hats personalized with the phrase MAGPIE BIRDING CLUB earlier this year and I wear her nonstop. No one understand what it means, of course, but it’s my little private way of being on my own team. One of my friends loved the idea so much she had a set personalized for her dad and herself with an inside joke on it (I think it said: CAROLINE’S GARDENING CREW). You could do something cute for all your girlfriends, or for your siblings, or just for your spouse and yourself. THE ALLEN SPORT TROUPE or SHOOP WINE CLUB or something like it.

04. Just back from Italy, I can’t stop talking about these divinely scented clay pomegranates, which delicately release their soapy, iconic scent into the air. Such an elegant air freshener / alternative to a candle. I have mine in my closet and it sparks immediate happiness each time I walk by. I also think this opulent set of mini votives would be ideal for a scent snob, especially paired with a chic set of matches. I have a thing for pretty matchboxes — I just went to my high school’s annual holiday bazaar and the only thing I bought besides toffee was a bunch of oversized matchboxes with Christmas motifs on the front to pair with holiday candles as my go-to hostess gift. Similar matches to pair with a great holiday candle here, here, here.

05. Puzzle trays — perfect for parents / in-laws who love to puzzle, bundled with one of these fabulous puzzles.

06. I have this RWI hair brush on my mind for one of my sisters, who just wrote asking me for post-partum hair help. This brush won’t bring her hair back but it will help with hair maintenance and is such a great everyday joy-bearer. (Y’all were right!)

07. My mother already bought a whole suite of these delicious throw blankets to give away for the holidays. I just ordered one of the new tartan ones and want to selfishly keep it for the holiday hygge but might wrap and send to some family friends. Or buy another. Use code JEN15 for 15% off.

08. The chicest coupes on the planet. My most treasured possessions. Maybe pair with our favorite cocktail book, or just print a few of recipes out on cards? (This one is a must.) I actually noticed a lot of the hotels/restaurants in Italy used this brand of glassware — Zafferano!

09. A Hedley & Bennett chef-grade apron. This is the frontrunner gift we have in mind for my brother in law, who is quite adept in the kitchen. I got one of these for Mr. Magpie a few years ago and he uses it constantly.

10. Caroline’s Cake Bites — these are so delicious, beautifully packaged, and fun (!) to open. I love sending food gifts and this is at the top of my list for some family members.

11. Quince cashmere sweatshirt — the hidden jewel of Quince’s cashmere curation. I just ordered a second one in gray. I love the fit and silhouette of this modern twist on a classic cashmere crewneck.

12. Appointed notebooks and your favorite pens, or a fancy pen from Caran D’Ache for a fellow list-maker / journaler / etc. Upgrade pick: my mom gave Mr. Magpie a Montblanc pen when he graduated from business school and he carries it with him everywhere. It is so perfectly him — he has one pen, and it costs $500. A men of fewer, better possessions.

13. Fellow Aiden Precision Coffee Maker. On my list for Mr. Magpie this year. He rarely buys anything for himself (except for light bulbs — he loves to buy lightbulbs? Maybe a fellow electrical engineer can explain this to me), but he specifically mentioned wanting this. And he is a coffee snob. He used to do the manual grind thing…

14. I’m convinced every woman in our lives needs this relax set from Lake Pajamas. She’s a sure thing.

15. One of these hand-painted canvas totes from Alex Mill or a Rue De Verneuil tote. Both so chic and different. A twist on the LL Bean classics — something that will set her apart from the rest.

16. Scripture cards from Camilla Moss or a desk calendar from Inslee. Perfect for the mother-in-law who has it all, or a prayerful sister-in-law, or an elegant friend.

17. Subscription to Ann Patchett’s Book Club, a membership to a local art museum (Phillips Collection would be my top rec for DC-based Magpies), or a delivery from Picayune Cellars in Calistoga, CA (female-founded)!

18. Over the top: a private catered dinner from Rose’s Luxury or a staycation at a fabulous hotel (I’d stay at the Four Seasons in Georgetown and avail myself of the recently-opened spa).

19. Nothing is chicer than a carefully selected book — preferably something you read and loved — with a thoughtful inscription on the frontispiece. (“Read this and thought of the time we…”) Maybe pair with an Ex Libris book embosser.

20. The Clemence five stone diamond bracelet is so elegant, and yet a reasonable $160. If you want to make a seriously big impression on someone this year, go with this bracelet — it arrives in an elegant croc-effect box with a gorgeous ribbon and a velvet envelopes. Fool-proof, too, since I believe it works with any style — traditional, edgy, youthful, sophisticated. For a step up, these earrings are among my most worn these days.

If you’re looking for something more niche — more utility oriented than decorative, or fashion-related — my kitchen gear guides are, if I can be honest, fairly recherche. You might start here or here and bundle a few smaller things, or pair with the H&B apron. This list of Magpie reader “regrettably worth it” items is also a good starting point for something likely to stir a strong allegiance in its recipient.

If you are reading this to shop for your wife, just buy her the Dyson Air Wrap. I promise it will knock her socks off. (Full, effusive review here.)

What I’d like to receive…one of these beautiful Ginori 1735 coffee mugs. The breakfast china all over Italy was so charming and whimsical — I would love to drink my morning coffee out of this, and maybe begin a little collection to add to over the years. Also wouldn’t mind a set of Bombas socks (dying to try this regrettably worth it brand but for some reason just haven’t done it? A luddite by nature I guess). Bigger ticket: my Chanel ballet flats are something I wear year-round and would love a second pair, maybe in a fun color or unexpected velvet fabric, or a Celine bag.

What are you gifting and hoping to receive?

P.S. Gift closet must haves. I also just placed my annual big order of Rifle Paper gift wrap.

P.P.S. Lots of great hostess gift ideas here (read comments).

P.P.P.S. Letting out the seams.

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