Are you hanging in there?
Here to say that if you find yourself shuttling between moments of “ohmygod” and “I wish I was a Pinterest mom, but this is not happening” and “is it appropriate to have a glass of wine yet [it’s 3 p.m.]” and then tender-hearted, maybe-this-is-teaching-me-to-just-slow-down-and-soak-up-my-loved-ones and then panic-stricken anxiety about catching the virus / what this is doing to the economy and healthcare system —
I feel ya. I’m right there with you.
A few years ago, I cried on the phone to one of my girlfriends after a loved one had passed away. I remember blubbering through my words, making mincemeat of myself, and at one point saying, “I don’t feel like I should be allowed to feel this sad, but I do–” and she said: “Woah, woah, woah. Jen. You are allowed to grieve. You are allowed to feel every single thing you feel. You don’t need to ask for permission.”
I’ve repeated these words countless times to myself and to loved ones who need to hear it. “I shouldn’t feel like this because [someone else has it worse / I need to be strong / it will all be OK / etc.].” We all say these things to ourselves, feebly or forcibly attempting to brook the flow of our emotions with reason or guilt or empathy for others, but —
We are permitted to feel the way we feel.
And sometimes that means feeling fifteen different ways about a single situation.
Deep breath. We’re all in this together.
Today, sharing some distractions if you’re looking for ’em — all the pretty horses, if you will: a couple of posts from the Magpie archives you may not have seen, some pretty pictures, and a few links for some retail therapy…
REFLECTIONS ON MY INTENSE CASE OF IMPOSTER SYNDROME IN MY 20S
NOW WOULD BE A GOOD TIME TO MAKE CINNAMON TOAST
ENDINGS ARE HARD TO WRITE
HAD TO ORDER THIS STUNNING TOP IN THE BLUE (UNDER $100)
ADORE THESE SCALLOPED PINCH BOWLS
THIS COCONUT-ROSE TONING SPRAY MAKES ME FEEL LIKE I’M ON VACATION
WOULD NEVER GUESS THIS ON-TREND, VICTORIAN-ESQUE BLOUSE WAS FROM GAP
THE PRETTIEST RUFFLE-TRIM TRENCH COAT FOR UNDER $70!
OH MY — THESE PLACEMATS
EYEING THIS NEW COOKBOOK FOR SOME INSPO
RALPH LAUREN HAS SOME FUN NEW PATTERNS OUT FORM EVERYDAY CHINA — HOW PLAYFUL IS THIS STAR PRINT OR THIS GARDEN VINE PRINT?!
P.S. Swings and Easter basket filler ideas.
Yes. yes. I hard times, I am reminded of this Rilke verse:
“Let everything happen to you
Beauty and terror
Just keep going
No feeling is final”
We’ll get through this. It probably won’t be quick, but we will eventually see the other side of it. In the meantime, let yourself feel everything- it’s all valid.
Love this — thank you so much for sharing. “No feeling is final.” Will be carrying that with me for a long time!
Thank you for this reminder that all of our various feelings are valid! I often tend to minimize my own feelings since there’s always someone going through something tougher … and while that’s true, it doesn’t mean we’re not allowed to grieve, or feel anxious, or cry, etc. etc.
This is such a trying time and I’m trying to give myself the grace to feel what I feel, acknowledge it, and move on productively when it feels right.
xx
Exactly right, MK. xxx