Last week, Suleika wrote about her love of dogs; I felt a familiar ache. We have been two years without Tilly in our home, and still we speak of her as though she was just here. We love to comment: “can you imagine if Tilly…[were here for that squirrel running through the yard / were left alone with the counter full of Thanksgiving dinner / could clean up these crumbs beneath the dining room table after a children’s party]. Her idiosyncrasies are so deeply impressed upon me that I still think of her in little moments of my daily life — not a full thought, more of the half-shadow of one: the way she loved ice, would scamper over to the fridge whenever we were dispensing cubes from the freezer, would crunch on them with this unseemly equine-like jawing motion after. The groaning sound she’d make when we’d disturb her nap. The officious click-clack of her nails on the floors when someone was approaching the front door. We called it her “dub step” for one of those inscrutable and irrational family reasons, even though it looked more like a military march. She’d over-articulate her paws; her limbs would be stiff, alert. The grand poobah of the front door. Our harlequin guardian. What a nut — ! God, I loved her —

It feels good to write about the lost, doesn’t it? To remember them in detail. They are never gone.

But I think the time has finally come for us to get a new dog. We’ve been talking in lollygagging loops about it for months and months now. Landon has finally caved (he was the hold-out, for reasons sentimental and practical), and now it’s a matter of breeders and timing. I’m bullish: there’s never a good time, I remind Landon. And my dog-adoring father-in-law lives just down the way and could help us if we ended up needed to leave town unexpectedly (a chief factor in getting a puppy). I also find myself parroting my neighbor, who decided to adopt a pet while in the midst of a lot of change at home (and a full home to begin with: two girls, two cats!). We were walking along the Potomac River while she told me this, and she said: “I mean, what’s one more?” I think about her saying that often, her full-armed embrace of these heavy-on-the-vine years. This one wild and precious life.

I’m going to press the matter after the holidays. It is time.

Anyhow, in her post last week, Suleika included a quote that struck me right in the heart:

“A small creature restores shape in ways humans rarely manage: simply by being there with no demands and no narrative to uphold. Sometimes survival isn’t insight—it’s companionship that doesn’t ask you to perform.“

The heart-swell I felt in reading those words…! I wrote not long ago about “places we don’t need to perform,” and of course — “on the ground with my dog” made the short-list. My God, the way dogs receive you just as you are, and with perfect patience and unyielding affection. Tilly’s nose pressed against the window-pane, waiting for our return. I could be sick, unhappy, bristly and short-tempered, and still she would wait for me, tail-a-wag, as though I were God’s greatest gift to this universe. Which, in a way, we were to her? How gorgeous to be loved that way, to have the gift of “companionship that doesn’t ask you to perform.”

Onward, Magpies —

P.S. Every month, Magpie readers search for (or email me for) my posts on grieving a pet. This is so moving to me, and I am sending love to anyone in those tender days of grief. I wrote about this here and here, and wrote about knowing she was going to leave us here.

P.P.S. My sister recently lost her cat and we texted a lot in the days just after. One thing I told her I found very valuable was carrying around a little token/talisman to honor/remind me of Tilly. I don’t know what it is about that physical object connection that I find helpful. (I also find it helpful to have a rosary or necklace on hand when going into a scary/stressful situation.) Anyway, could be something small; something you already have. A little stone, a trinket, her dog tag, even just a piece of ribbon. But I ended up getting a gorgeous signet ring engraved with Tilly’s initial that I still wear. I also love these chunkier signet rings (currently 25% off).

Last-Minute Holiday Shopping.

First, I promised you a list of what we were getting our kids for Christmas and frankly we chased this down to the wire in terms of actually purchasing their gifts, so sharing in short format here, in case you are looking for a few last-minute additions. Some of the stocking stuffers we picked up here (some of these we’ve given as Advent gifts / gave in years past). When I asked Magpie readers, I learned the big gift items this year are the Nugget play couch, the Nintendo Switch 2, and Legos of course! Legos never fail us. We’re deep in that phase!

I also put together a little list of ideas for teens here. We have a couple of high school baby-sitters for whom I purchased gifts — all beauty/skincare. I specifically bundled these lip minis with this Pixi set for two of them. Some of these gift sets are 20% off at Sephora through today! I will say one of the moms at my daughter’s school mentioned these Kendra Scott necklaces are VERY popular among middle school girls this year FWIW! Passing along JIC it’s helpful.

Two Good Deals.

First, Crocs are 50% off here this weekend only?! Great time to buy for season ahead.

Second, I know a lot of you are fellow fans of Kate McLeod (so many of us bought these breathe solid-to-oil shower pebbles — the way I craved them while congested!!) They’re offering a discount on two holiday stones bundled together. I actually love to give these as an unexpected hostess gift / friend gift. They’re just a little different and the packaging is lovely.

Sunday Shopping.

Now for us – I think my favorite find of the week is this La Ligne-esque oversized stripe knit from Boden! Love the idea of styling it with brown jeans, as shown on site!

I was thinking this week about how much joy this silly mug sparks for me on a daily basis. Look for ways to elevate the everyday with beautiful objects — a spectacular, splurgey hair claw; luxe purse cream; fancy chopsticks (more colors here).

I saw someone apply this water-based “colour [SIC] wash” on Instagram and am very intrigued to try. I know people absolutely go crazy over her eyeliner. I think I might order both to try.

This canvas tote continues to be my week-in, week-out everyday bag. It carries a TON and I love the hand initialing on the side — Goyard vibes! Speaking of Goyard vibes, this $20 “inspired-by” card case…! More of my best Amazon finds for this month here.

The Gap jeans I ordered this week! Come in a petite inseam. I got in the burgundy color but there are so many great washes — love this ecru and also the leopard?!

Obsessed with these charming pasta bowls! Hand-painted!

UNDO HAIR CLIP // DIPTYQUE HAND BALM // AURATE SIGNET RINGS // BODEN SWEATER // GAP JEANS // SABRE CHOPSTICKS // SNOWFLAKE FLEECE // PORTA HAND-PAINTED PASTA BOWLS // VICTORIA BECKHAM COLOUR WASH // ALEX MILL TOTE // GOYARD INSPIRED CARD CASE // FREDA SALVADOR WINNIE BOOT

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