Even now, decades into a creative life, I occasionally have the feeling of an outsider: capable only of the most obtuse insights, gleaned through the silhouette of a fogged pane, my feet slipping on the wet stone beneath me. I harbor the shadowed half-thought: “I shouldn’t be here,” as though my skidding will alert the authorities that I am not as I present to be.
And, why? My heart, dressed up in words, is on the page, isn’t it? I have the worn-down keyboard to show for it; I carry the splinters, the patina, the hands stained with ink, the writer’s callous.
So I turn myself outside; I watch a fox with a rabbit in its mouth, nearly prancing across the yard grass running along the east side of my home in his triumph. He is not hiding; he is not ashamed. He has done what he was made for. He has earned his victuals, his victory lap.
I sigh, then, at myself. At my paltriness, at my pocket-change worries, at my pawing after the fox. Such a lot of nothing, this self-measurement. Let me write well, let me eat well, let me love well, and let me let the rest alone.
Meanwhile, the trees move, unbidden and alive. Yes, put all of that aside, they offer, as the wind draws the branches into itself, as they surrender to their spectacular ways of being. I draw myself as their metaphor, feeling the language arc beneath me, half-happenstance and half-hewn: I am sunburst lichen, I am the wood nymph Daphne. I could write forever in these leafy arms, close to this heartwood.
Here, again and always, I remember to shrug off the heavy wool of my own self-perceptions. Bare skin against the bark, the sap runs into the stylus.
Post-Scripts.
+(More of) what the trees teach me.
Shopping Break.
+New Majorelle caftan alert! I have one of these in a blockprint fabric similar to this and it’s just the easiest, chicest thing to wear all summer long.
+Just ordered two of these outdoor stick lamps ($35 each with the cutest faux raffia shade!). (While you’re there, you might also consider this woven tray, this outdoor storage box, and this wall-mount towel rack.)
+Currently carrying this lip SPF and the best facial sunscreen I’ve ever tried in my purse. I’ve noticed as I get older that I often find myself saying, “gosh, that sun feels intense” and wishing I had a little extra SPF to layer on. I’m now in the habit of having it always close at hand!
+I’m telling you, these are the best kitchen towels ever. Love the size, pattern, absorbency, and especially the slim profile (you can stow a ton of them in a drawer).
+My favorite everyday/travel pants are on sale for 20% off again here! (Sizing and styling notes here!). I wore these on the way back from NYC. Insanely comfortable and you look fresh as a daisy coming off the Acela — these do not wrinkle!
+This breezy cotton blouse comes in the prettiest florals — that green is spectacular! (I found a similar Doen-inspired top for under $30 here.) Meanwhile, I just ordered this dress from Doen. The silhouette is so charming to me, and I’m in love with the pattern. Sort of a 1950s vibe!
+Handsome, relaxed-fit shorts for Mr. Magpies — weekend shorts! (And a butter yellow sweatshirt for us.)
+This crochet Loewe crossbody…! Colors, size, design! SO GOOD. Also love this oversized style. WOW.
+The best cashmere wraps, restocked in all the great colors. (Great last minute gift for a mother or mother in law.). While you’re there: how fab is this new “airknit” lightweight sweater in that hot pink hue?
+Love the silhouette/fit of these sweatpants.
+Did you know Diptyque has a car scent diffuser?! Also never tried their rhubarb scented candle but sort of fixated on the description as a possible summer scent: “In the heart of the vegetable garden, long stalks of rhubarb in shades of pink and green reveal their bittersweet, vibrant scent.” While you’re there: this liquid blush is amazing and now it’s available in a bronze hue. It was tricky for me to figure out how to apply at first — you dab a few drops onto your cheek and blend and it gives you the best “watercolor-like” blush finish, like saturated into your skin, blooming! It’s beautiful.
+Boden released its Arabella dress in a new great print. This dress is so good!
+Found my cashmere bandana scarf restocked in four great colors. I get so much wear out of this. It is the perfect finishing touch to jeans and a tee.
+This chic exaggerated collar blouse!
+Ordered my daughter one of these drawstring wet bags for swim team season ahead — I’ve been looking for something like this for her for awhile! I had it personalized with her name on the side.
This post may contain affiliate links. If you make a purchase through the links above, I may receive compensation.
