On Saturday, I shared the Mahmoud Darwish quote: “Coffee should not be drunk in a hurry. It is the sister of time, and should be sipped slowly, slowly.” All weekend long, I kept thinking about things that are best done slowly. A counter-cultural, a rebours concept: actively not optimizing, expediting, streamlining and instead letting things laze, drip-drop, slowly unfold, bloom on their own timetables. (Perfect terming: I love the word “bloom” for the phase of pour-over coffee-making where hot water first kisses the coffee grounds.)
Here, then, is my full “legato list”: the activities that beg us to slow down and are best enjoyed when not in a hurry — “slowly, slowly.”
Morning coffee
Cursive
Exhaling
Breathing in general
Becoming an expert in yourself
Kissing
Shampooing your hair (stop rushing! a hot shower is a true joy)
A postprandial walk
Reading poetry — per Billy Collins: “take a poem and hold it up to the light like a color slide”
Writing in Sharpie
Waking up
Responding when angry
Walking in the dark (literally and figuratively – i.e., take your time feeling your way through unknowns)
Stretching
Peeling stickers off of new products (especially clear organizational bins)
Forming judgements
Melting butter
Winding down before bed (you can’t park a car going 80 mph)
Risotto and grits
Aging – what a gift, to do this slowly
What would you add?
*Thank you, Stephanie, for the addition of risotto to this list! You also made me think of any soup or stew, dough that needs long proofing, browning butter, emulsifying oil and vinegar (drip by drip!), mise en place in general (no need to be hurried with a knife), BBQ. Cooking teaches us so much about time, doesn’t it? It asks us to wait and observe and listen to the food and plan carefully and anticipate that the instructions will not match the reality in some way. It provides its own primers in patience and noticing.
SOURCES: ONE // TWO // THREE // FOUR
SOURCES: ONE // TWO // THREE // FOUR
Post-Scripts.
+Other lessons from the kitchen.
+Kitchen gear we love that you may not have. (I just updated and republished this post yesterday!)
+Notes on making really good cocktails at home.
Shopping Break.
+J. Crew just restocked its gorgeous cosmo pants in petite sizes and new colors. (Great look for less for La Ligne Colbys.)
+A classic cardigan for the depths of winter.
+OO love this red knit dress.
+You all are loving the Mother Half Pipe jeans. Such a great fit.
+Chanel vibes. Love!
+Serena and Lily’s tent sale is worth a look – extra 20% off sale prices with code CELEBRATIONS. Love these organizational bins for closets; a great time to buy their pinecone wreath; and I’m actually debating ordering this beautiful mirror to replace the one in our powder bathroom. Finally, how chic would this chess set be, kept out on a game or coffee table?
+Pretty floral trellis rug for an entry area or mud room.
+Tiny upgrade I made at the beginning of 2025: bought extra pairs of scissors and ceramic-blade box cutters to keep throughout the kitchen and in my studio. I feel like we’re always misplacing them, kids are borrowing scissors, etc. So helpful!!
+Fun tuxedo-front stripe shirt.
+Love the idea of these swipe-on glittery eye-shadows. I personally like anything you can swipe on and then use a finger to even out — I usually wear RMS Beauty’s Eye Tint or Jillian Dempsey’s formula (I especially like the taupe). If I’m trying something more dramatic with more contouring for evening, you really can’t beat Makeup by Mario’s palettes. The formula is so good — it doesn’t all flutter and fly off your lid while applying and it really stays put. The colors are gorgeous too.
+Saw a woman wearing these with a big chunky sweater the other day — SO chic.
+Intrigued by this new arrival at Frank and Eileen.
+My eight-year-old niece asked for a bathrobe for Christmas — isn’t that sweet? A good robe is a great buy, though. I love my Hill House hotel robe for post-shower lazing and my Weezie for an extra layer over jammies (I specifically like the over-long length of the sash on this one — it really stays put). For getting ready / blow-drying hair, I like the slimmer cotton ones from Lake so I don’t overheat. But wouldn’t these patterned ones from Weezie be cute for a little one?
+Rifle is offering a post-Christmas sale. I’m telling you: your future self will thank you if you take this as an opportunity to stock up on next year’s holiday gift wrap and gift bags and little holiday giftables for next season’s party circuit (matches to bundle with a candle; notepads to wrap up in cello with a velvet bow). Also a good time to buy decor for next year.
This post may contain affiliate links. If you make a purchase through the links below, I may receive compensation.
Image via.
I love this concept. A few I can think of —
* (related to what you wrote on melting butter) browning butter. Ahhh one of the best aromas ever.
* watching ocean waves
* hugging a child. I once read somewhere that the Disney employees at the park (who dress as the characters and receive hugs from children) are instructed to wait until the child lets go. I’ve since internalized this and always wait for my daughter to release the hug before I do.
* Making and canning jam. One of the episodes of my favorite food podcast, Home Cooking (with Samin Nosrat and Hrishikesh Hirway) was about preserving fruit, and Samin mentioned this quote by Rebecca Solnit: “…Cooking is usually on the side of life… Making preserves is an art of stalling time, of making the fruit that is so evanescent last indefinitely… Each container is a capsule in which time stands still.” It was so evocative for me that I had to look up the original source, and found the piece here: https://bookreadfree.com/151627/3745492
Love these so much — especially the note on holding your child until he/she lets go! So sweet. And totally agree on watching any kind of running water. You really need to stop and sit there to get that wonderful heart-peace feeling.
xx
Candy making. My final coffee of the morning. Doing my daughter’s hair (it’s a tiny intimacy as much as a task and I need to remember that). Greetings and farewells. A hike. Swimming in the sea. Lunch with girlfriends. Choosing vegetables at the market. Browsing a book store. The playground or ludothèque (my husband gets squirrelly in the first half hour, but a few hours of play makes our whole week!). Making my bed. Sitting on the terrace. Preparation of any kind (I like a good long run-up). School drop off.
“I like a good long run-up” — ! This reminds me of my mom laying out the plates and dishes for any party at least 2 days before the event. It always added to the excitement for me and was one less thing for her to have to do the day-of.
xx
My legatos, including my most frivolous ones. Holding a baby. Squeezing the hand of an elderly loved one. Enjoying the sound of Sunday football on tv in fall. The scent of a room an hour after burning a beautiful candle. The rising sun on the drive home from a really good workout class. A glass of cold champagne at the airport bar awaiting a flight departure. A solo shopping trip to a fancy mall. An indulgent spa treatment. Room service breakfast at a luxury hotel. A night sleeping on a plush mattress in crisp white bed linens at aforementioned hotel.
Love these so much — “the scent of a room an hour after burning a beautiful candle” was so specific and evocative for me. I know that sensation intimately, and it does have this resonance to it. Thanks for sharing!
xx
full “legato list”:
Sipping tea &/or coffee in the morning before anyone is up and it’s still dark
A hot bath
Reading in the morning
Journaling
Prayer
Gratitude
A slow roast in the oven or whole chicken
Time before the world wakes up and things get busy
Walking through my neighborhood slowly discovering new things
Time with my dog & family
Long lunches or dinners to savor
Thanking God for allowing to me to wake up another day
The ability to move my body
Cherishing my home staying in when everyone else wants to go out
Love these, Courtney! I love the idea of waking before the world gets up and things get busy. I am not yet that early morning girl but I anticipate that’s the next phase of my life. I can imagine how restful that must feel!
xx