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I own almost every single one of the everyday sweaters below. These are the ones I reach for week in and week out. You’ll notice several repeated brands in this list, but I have to say I think Alice Walk wins the “most worn” award in my daily life. Something about the designs, softness, silhouettes makes them compulsively wearable. They sent me this new cashmere cardigan earlier this month and I wore it the first four days in a row after I opened the package. Dreamy soft (not a hint of scratchiness), the perfect proportions (loose enough to layer over a base knit, hits at a perfect spot on the hip), and great colors (I have the toast color). But if you’re new to this brand, I cannot extol the virtues of their cotton weekender more. It’s a divinely soft, stretchy knit cotton (not itchy or stiff in the least) and it layers perfectly over a basic tee and jeans. You’ll want to live in it, I promise. I own in two colors and can’t say enough good things about it. It’s also a great buy because you can wear now, obviously, but it’s also the perfect top layer for a chilly spring or summer night, boat day with heavy wind, breezy afternoon on the beach, etc.

01. Cotton boyfriend crewneck sweater in a gorgeous sky blue.

02. This Jenni Kayne cashmere cardigan is an excellent investment piece.

03. Wearing this cardigan above, with a Leset pointelle henley.

04. Gorgeous La Ligne stripe in several colors.

05. Quince structured cardigan — a great look for less for this.

06. I love wearing this belted sweater on cool mornings.

07. Lots of layering possibilities with this neutral cardi — and the pockets!

08. This chunky Alice Walk is a staple.

09. Navy cashmere turtleneck from Sold Out NYC. (15% off with MAGPIE15). Has the perfect featherweight/feather-soft feel.

10. This soft pink Tuckernuck classic — comes in other colors too! Perfect for spring. (See me in it here, along with a few other statement cardigans in pastels.)

11. J. Crew cotton cardigan — their heritage cotton is great now through summer. Part of my fisherman cottage core moment (see me wearing it here).

12. Stunning Doen cable knit cardigan.

13. COS has some very chic sweaters — I love this beige turtleneck.

14. Relaxed crew neck from Aritizia in several limited edition colors.

15. A really good basic cardigan; I own in the chai color. These tend to sell out fast.

P.S. On love and mess.

P.P.S. Outfits that have caught my attention.

P.P.P.S. New Quince discoveries.

“A good month, March, with February blowing out the back door and spring waiting at the front. A good month for change.” – Joanne Harris

I loved some of the small changes you shared a few weeks ago in response to my prompt: “What’s one small change you’ve made in 2025?” Some of them were not so small, in fact. (We are cheering you on, Rachel!) But if you’ve been waiting for a prompt to start or stop something, or even take one tiny half-step forward, here it is: the dawn of March; chapter three of twelve. This is where the plot gets good.

It is also where we notice, as I did this morning, those brave daffodil sprouts making their way through the litter of leaves in the garden beds in the front yard. Is there anything more felicitous than a daffodil stem after months of flexing cold fingers in pockets and stamping numb feet against the earth? Its green is so generous; its determined rise almost unbearably sanguine. I want to push the leaves away from their tender stalks, but then I know they are hardier than they look, and everything is progressing as it should without my tampering hands.

Anyway, March. We are all in for your thaw.

What are your themes this month? I was writing at my desk with no lights on this morning — just the sunlight that filters through the window, which is not sufficient to fill the entire space, but I like it that way for my morning warm-up. It gives me the impression that I’m shooting from the hip. I don’t need to be precious or perfect with my words. I just let the pen do what it wants in the dim. As I wandered, I found myself drawn to that question: what are my themes for the month?

quality

Jo March energy

“actually I do have the time”

the crumbs I’ll miss

small changes for the better

make like the fox and practice resurrection (a la Wendell Berry)

Some of these are self-explanatory, I trust, but let me elaborate on two. “Actually I do have the time” — I am borrowing this from a mantra by my friend Aubrey: “Actually, life is beautiful and I do have the time.” I have found this to be the most helpful fingerhold this week. I am hurrying, I am feeling the usual push and pull of too many things on my plate, and I am inwardly chastising myself for stopping to look at the daffodils or laying on the mat in our home gym for a few minutes after finishing my workout. My inner manager: “Jen, move it.” My inner maker: “Actually, I do have the time.” A life where I can’t give myself a few minutes for a silent shavasana or a quick study of the auspiciousness of a daffodil bud (which is actually, as Mary Oliver made the case on my occasions, the same thing as praying) — no. I do not want that life. Actually I do have the time.

And “the crumbs I’ll miss”: I snapped a photo of my son last weekend (below), and as I was editing it, I noticed the ring of crumbs around his mouth — truthfully, his natural state. He is five and still I find myself wiping yogurt and chocolate from him daily. But as I looked at that photo, and at his sweet daffodil face, I thought: “One day I’ll miss those crumbs.” One day, and I don’t know when it will happen — it will be one of those invisible thefts of motherhood — I’ll realize “oh, he takes care of that himself now.” And I’ll miss those crumbs, those years of him still needing me to take care of him in that way. So I am noticing the crumbs, and the arch way my daughter looks when telling a funny story, and their tiny, perfect forms just as they are right now, and I am holding them to the light.

What are your March themes?

Post-Scripts.

+A stirring spring poem.

+The internal mother.

+On making friendships in motherhood.

Shopping Break.

The following content may contain affiliate linksIf you make a purchase through the links below, I may receive compensation.

+The kind of dress you can live in.

+A good time to buy outdoor furniture — al fresco dining season is not too far out! We love this teak dining table (this is the exact one we have), and it’s currently 25% off! (And you can refresh your seating with this chic set of navy cushions with white piping!)

+This sweet clutch is on its way to me for spring. I adore her! I can’t wait to coordinate with all my favorite butter yellow pieces. Imagine with my cashmere tee and Doen skirt! Spring loading.

+Speaking of butter yellow, you may know I have been hemming and hawing over the Le Monde Beryl flats in yellow, and then I discovered this look for less from Madewell and decided to grab those instead!

+Also at Madewell: OMG these rattan bags! I can’t decide between the green, blue, or natural…! SO CUTE.

+And back to my Doen skirt! I know I’ve been chatting a lot about it, and have already shared this great look for less, which a bunch of you have ordered. Gap also has a similar style at a great price and I discovered this cute blue variation for $69. I LOVE the way it’s styled with gray on the model; copying that immediately. (And also will obviously pair with my favorite gray tote!)

+Got these Easter jammies for my little chicks!

+A really pretty white dress – love the apron front.

+WOW this pink tweed jacket.

+New Zara discoveries: this denim cape shirt, this Alaia-vibes laser cut faux suede shirt (! — I’d wear over a white tee with white jeans and brown suede flats), and these nearly-sold-out flats.

+Asha has some beautiful new ready to wear pieces — love this caftan dress and this skirt and top set.

+Droolworthy tote from Loro Piana.

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I have been wearing and loving my new quilted, dramatic-collared jacket from Loeffler Randall. The perfect amount of whimsy. For those who have asked: I find this jacket runs big (I took an XXS, and it’s still roomy; I’m typically an XS). If you like the look but want something a little less expensive, try this Anthro in a fun gingham or this $39 Amazon steal.

A few other great coats and jackets for the transition to spring:

+Barn jackets remain a perfect pick for this in-between season. Gap has a great $118 option; it reminds me a lot of Doen’s chic $400 version. But there are some fun statement barn jackets out on the market — I’ve been swooning over this embellished Veronica Beard and I thought this laminated linen style from J. Crew was head-turning, too. And the Erdem x Barbour collab is nearly sold out, but had such fun styles — love this peplum. J. Crew has a fun colorblocked Barbour available that’s also worth a gander, and this cinch-waist style is flattering.

+My ideal rain jacket for April showers. If you’re looking for something cropped, this Everlane style is super chic, too.

+For denim jackets, I’m noticing options that are belted or nipped at the waist. Love this Everlane and this Ulla Johnson.

+A trench is always a good idea. I’ve been getting a lot of wear out of my Mango, but am also drawn to the unbelted option from Sezane. I like how the European and Scandi women style them with straw basket bags in the spring. Inspo below. I also love when chic peas wrap a sweater around their trench shoulders — more inspo below!

P.S. Just updated my Shopbop hearts.

P.P.S. When grace is hidden in plain sight.

P.P.P.S. What’s a path you’re happy you didn’t take?

Image via.

I’ve been writing about summer lately. The first kiss of 62 degree weather will do that to you; you remember, all at once, the matchless feeling of sun-warmed skin. My mind immediately swims to the beginning of July, when the languid heat of the Midatlantic summer has unpacked and put away its suitcases: it has settled in, with no plans to leave, and it is hot and still. Around that time of year, the fireflies in our trees are a glittering marvel. We walk outside once the sun has set and gape at the majestic display while swatting mosquitos, tumblers of rose sweating in our palms. The flagstone path to our front door is still-warm from the day’s sun; the night sky is not yet black. We are barefoot and unwinding. Everything, including Mother Nature, is lazy and loose. And in front of us, thousands of tiny winged creatures improvise a light show for about seven consecutive nights between late June and early July, after which I suppose they die in great numbers? But what a life, anyway: built to shine. Effortless, ecstatic streaks in a dark world. Of course, we show up nightly for their frontyard performance.

I realized as I wrote this paragraph that this particular tradition has become one of my favorite seasonal rituals. It is, truly, magic — the fireflies exist in such unbelievable numbers; you wouldn’t believe it. There are thousands and thousands glowing in sequence, like a silent set of fireworks, or a abrupt visual morse code cluing me into the vastness of the ecosystem around me.

This made me wonder – what are your some of your treasured off-beat seasonal rituals? I’m talking things like “The Nutcracker Lounge” (scroll down) one of our Magpies shared with us last year — the narrow and hyper-local ways we mark the change in seasons. Maybe it’s gathering peaches from your uncle’s peach tree, or canning fruit with your grandmother, or planting the spring garden. Maybe it’s the swimming of the horses in Chincoteague, or tapping trees for maple syrup. Whatever it is, would you share? Sometimes I feel we are so disconnected from the natural world and its mountainous and minute rhythms. I’d love to celebrate the ways we still connect with our turn around the sun.

Post-Scripts.

+More on the firefly phenomenon here.

+Nature’s mysteries.

+Imprints of a new lifestyle (reflections on our move from NYC to suburban MD).

Shopping Break.

This post may contain affiliate links. If you make a purchase through the links below, I may receive compensation.

+You all loved this denim shirt last week — resharing here and also offering a look for less. I LOVE denim on denim — try it! Matching washes gives a polished look, but mixed can also work well.

+Gap has some great new arrivals — this barn jacket feels like Doen but less $$, this denim dress is reminiscent of La Ligne, and I love all the color options for these barrel jeans — especially the khaki!

+Related to the khaki-colored jeans: I was just looking at Ulla Johnson’s spring collection and loved all the utility-inspired colors/pieces, like these statement jeans, this jacket, and this skirt. I’d urge you to consider the jacket. A statement jacket like the Ulla can do a lot of work for you during this transitional period. I just got my Loeffler Randall jacket late last week and it completely transforms my uniform of a white tee and jeans.

+CUTE $20 Easter basket.

+We’re getting to the time of year where this becomes my friend top layer over athleisure / jeans / etc for casual wear. Love the silhouette, colors, stripes, etc. A perfect sweatshirt. I have in two colors and gave to my mother and MIL.

+It’s going to be a skirt-heavy season for me this spring. I’ve already been styling my Doen skirt, but I also ordered this pretty linen skirt in ecru. Will look SO polished with brown leather sandals, a white tee, and a straw bag.

+ICYMI: Hill House did a big drop two weeks ago and I’m especially into this green pattern in either this style or this one. Selling out!

+CUTE Target find. Love several of the colors! The green especially!

+Ordered this cute gingham top ($54!).

+Bought my daughter these purple jeans and she flipped out. She loves the baggy sihouette!

+Gorgeous statement earrings, and on sale!

+I love statement earrings — often wear chunky gold ones — but on days where I one something lower key, my two go-tos are these Luciens from Dorsey and these delicate crossover huggies from Dana Rebecca.

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Meandering thoughts from the week —

I’ve been keeping this photo of myself at five on my desk. I originally thought she would remind me of how far I’ve come — an invitation to practice gratitude and astonishment on a regular basis — but she mainly tells me to give myself grace (I would never talk to five year old Jen the way I talk to 40 year old Jen), and tap into easy joys. How good it feels to stretch your arms; a full mug of coffee on my desk. Highly recommend putting a photo of yourself as a child on your desk and seeing what shakes out.

Something else I’ve been keeping on my desk: this post-it note that reads “Strive to be the lowest heart rate in the room.” I would do well to etch this onto every surface available to me. A cue to slow down and not rush through the life I’ve always dreamed of. I wrote more about this here, and the message has gotten a lot of shares on Instagram, too. I think a lot of us need this nudge, but I really needed it this week, and, frankly failed at it more than I succeeded. I was sprinting through the week. Too much pawing at my pockets; the margins too thin. I cried big, satisfying tears at one point, and it’s been a minute since I’ve done that. But that’s OK. In life, we will make mistakes. We must be like the fox — make more tracks than necessary — and practice resurrection.

One of the highlights of the week: my daughter asked to go to the bookstore. We took them to Politics and Prose and permitted them to pick one book apiece. In consultation with the friendly, knowledgeable staff there, she selected a new graphic novel which she in turn read six times in a row over the course of 24 hours. My son curiously chose a paint by sticker book, which I initially attempted to deter, but — eh. It’s OK. He has been really into reading these enormous encyclopedia-style books on dinosaurs, animals, sealife, etc, at home (current favorites: this and this) so maybe he just wanted something to play with. I need to capture this moment in action, but lately, my children have been coming to the breakfast table with books and propping them open to read while they eat. It’s so charming to see his tiny five year old form schlepping an enormous book and poring over the animal images (“mama, did you know this frog is poisonous?”) while he drips milk onto its pages.

Another (edible) highlight of the week: Landon made choux au craquelin using this Chef Steps recipe with the children. It took multiple days and a lot of work, and they were outrageously delicious. My favorite moment: we dispatched our children to bring a couple of the choux over to our neighbors, and I watched them from my front stoop as they communicated the instructions we had told them to pass along (i.e., “refrigerate if not eating tonight!”). There are two specific moments in motherhood that never cease to delight me: first, watching my children eat a full plate of food (I can’t explain it – hangover from not being able to produce enough milk to feed my children on my own and needing to supplement with formula? It is so deeply satisfying to me; I could watch their bird mouths forever!) and second, observing them doing a small thing independently, and working hard to do it the right way.

This week, I did not feel like I had the time to exercise, but I forced myself to do it a la the inspo “whenever you feel like you have no time to exercise, you need it the most,” and it gave me the best temporary sensation of slowing time and taking up space in my day. I usually do Sherica Holmon’s cycling videos (available on Apple Fitness) and she almost always says, at the beginning, “the next twenty minutes are just for you — so let go of what’s on your mind and take this time for you.” OK, Sherica!

Below: motivating myself to “just move the dirt” by wearing a pea tendril green, brand new fitness outfit (this one from Spanx – top here, bottom here, and a Beyond Yoga tank beneath; I think my code SHOOPXSPANX gets you 10 or maybe 15% off at Spanx).

After: the satisfying moment in which I put an “x” through the day to indicate I worked out. I’m proud of myself this month: I worked out more days than I didn’t. I find this visual very motivating. (Completion desire is real!) I had a few questions about this beautiful little desk calendar via Instagram. It’s from my favorite paper company, Appointed, but sadly sold out. Something like this would be a good (an inexpensive!) sub.

Finally, a moment of true rest at the end of last weekend: Landon and I playing our favorite board game over cocktails (Landon made Pink Ladies; aren’t they gorgeous, strutting around with that heavy lip of egg white foam?). One of the many reasons I love playing games is that it reminds me that I don’t need to fill every moment with something. I am often waiting for Landon to complete his turn, and I sit quietly and let my mind wander, or be empty. A surprisingly good way to practice slowing down.

OK, Magpies – into the new week. Shake a leg.

Sunday Shopping Poetry.

In this collage, want to make a little plug for my Rothy clogs (seen below). I absolutely love them. They have a sole that is suitable for outdoors but I mainly wear at home (or to slip on to take out garbage / run to the mailbox / etc). They have this arch support thing that feels like a massage on your instep. Sometimes I put them on and audibly sigh. I LOVE THEM.

A GREAT WAY TO TRACK YOUR FITNESS PROGRESS BY HAND // DROOLING OVER THIS STATEMENT TOP // A CABBAGE MUG FROM TARGET // MY NEW SPANX SET (TOP, BOTTOM) // MY FAVORITE AT HOME SHOE // THE BEST $15 TEE // FANCY PANTS // NEWLY OBSESSED WITH THIS SPF PRIMER* // I HAVE AND ADORE THIS PRADA CARD CASE — MAKES ME SMILE EVERY TIME I SEE IT IN MY BAG

*I have several products in this category that I love and alternate between. This one is new to me (I discovered it via Julia Berolzheimer, who was wearing nothing else on her face but this and looked like a radiant queen) but I routinely use the RMS SuperSerum primer to blend in with my foundation as well, and I also love the Iris and Romeo “Weekend Skin” which is sort of similar to both of these — probably the lightest-weight of the three.

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+HOW TO MAKE YOUR LIFE MORE WHIMSICAL: A friend of mine sent me this carousel of things women do to add whimsy to their lives, and I was deeply charmed. Basically — small ways to have fun with yourself, to make inside jokes with yourself. Time alone increases steadily as we age; it’s always a good idea to make friends with yourself.

+THE LEAST ROMANTIC THING ABOUT LOVE: I absolutely loved this post from Laura Fenucci. How achingly true! Another unromantic thing that is also deep proof of love: someone showing you patience when you’re at your worst. It also reminded me in general of our conversation about what marriage is — a lot of things, and at a wide variety of different volumes.

+SPEAKING OF…Inslee and I have done a few reprints of our Marriage Is print and are running low on our most recent one in case you’re interested in buying! This has been far and away our bestseller. We recently sold out of “Green Flags,” and the cardinal in that one has a special place in my heart. My Tilly girl hidden in plain sight.

+A BEAUTIFUL OBITUARY: Roxane Gay, one of my favorite social critics and writers, wrote the most beautiful tribute to her recently-deceased mother this past week. I loved every fine-tipped detail she included; I felt like I met her mother. It is so important to write down the details about your beloved lost while the memories are still fresh. I’ve written about this concept here

“When someone passes away, sit down at your desk and capture in precise language a memory. It doesn’t have to be profound, or moving, or dramatic. It could be a joke that made your aunt double over in laughter, or your cousin’s favorite turn-of-phrase, or the narrow and undecorated details of a trip to the shoe store with your grandma, or a conversation in the backyard with your next door neighbor.

Send these memories by hand to the bereaved, as though releasing paper boats into the water:

something slight and hand-formed that still, against all odds, floats.”

I have clung to the most threadbare memories of my friend Elizabeth more than I thought I would. I am glad I took the time to capture her a bit later than I should have; something is better than nothing.

+EYEING + BUYING: I did some spring shopping this week! I treated myself to this fun little spring jacket from Loeffler Randall (spurred on by the desire of adding more “whimsy” to my life!), these curve jeans from Everlane, and a few fitness goodies from Vuori (all my top picks here). Also absolutely drooling over these new denim ballet flats from Margaux (so good for spring, j’adore) and Cuyana’s latest bag silhouette!

PASTEL CROCS FOR SPRING // $20 FLORAL JAMMIES FOR LITTLE ONES // MY NEW SPRING JACKET // EVERLANE WAY HIGH JEANS // VUORI FEATHER FITNESS TEE // MARGAUX DENIM BALLET FLATS // WESTMAN ATELIER BRONZING DROPS // CUYANA DOUBLE LOOP BAG

+BESTSELLERS: The Tory Burch Romy bag! I’ve been wearing mine non-stop. She’s so easy to pick up and toss everything into, and the gray color is unusual but goes with everything. You’re gonna love her.

01. TORY BURCH ROMY BAG // 02. $49 WHITE WIDE LEG CROP JEANS (HAVE WORN MINE A TON ALREADY) // 03. FUN SPRING SNEAKS (SUCH GREAT COLORS; I HAVE IN RED) // 04. $12 GIRLS FITNESS DRESS // 05. TUCKERNUCK JELLY SANDALS // 06. EN SAISON EYELET SHIRTDRESS // 07. SPRING LAKE PAJAMAS // 08. EYELET MIDI SKIRT // 09. FOR THE BEST SMELLING LAUNDRY // 10. CUTEST DATE NIGHT TOP // 11. TUCKERNUCK BELT // 12. VARLEY SWEATER CARDIGAN

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Spring Lake Pajamas

COZY MORNING: LAKE PAJAMAS // J. CREW CARDIGAN

STANDARD WORK/MOM DAY: J. CREW CARDIGAN // DOEN SKIRT (LOOK FOR LESS HERE) // J. CREW POINTELLE HENLEY // BIRKENSTOCK BOSTON CLOGS (LOOK FOR LESS HERE)

STANDARD WORK/MOM DAY: ALICE WALK CASHMERE CARDIGAN // J. CREW POINTELLE HENLEY (GRAY) // CITIZENS CHARLOTTE JEANS // TORY BURCH ROMY BAG // DORSEY LUCIEN EARRINGS

EMORY’S FIRST CONFESSION!: JULIA AMORY DRESS // MARCH HARE WATCH (20% OFF WITH MAGPIE20) // LIZZIE FORTUNATO EARRINGS (OLD, SIMILAR HERE) // VERONICA BEARD DASH BAG // DORSEY HEART ID NECKLACE // DORSEY CLEMENCE NECKLACE

STANDARD WORK/MOM DAY: VERONICA BEARD JESSUP VEST (LOOK FOR LESS HERE) // ELLEME BOOMERANG BAG // RAG AND BONE WHITE TEE // HEAVEN MAYHEM MINI KNOT EARRINGS // PISTOLA JEANS // ASHA HEART CHARM BRACELET

MORNING MINISTRATIONS (LOL AT THE MASK, BUT I DO LOVE IT): CURRENT BODY RED LIGHT THERAPY MASK (JEN10 FOR 10% OFF) // RHONE DREAMGLOW HALF ZIP AND JOGGER (REALLY LOVE THIS PUTTY COLOR – GOES WITH EVERYTHING) // VUORI ENERGY TANK (MY FAV – I LITERALLY WEAR THIS EVERY SINGLE TIME RIGHT AWAY AS SOON AS IT’S OUT OF THE LAUNDRY) // DORSEY CLEMENCE NECKLACE // DANA REBECCA BEZEL NECKLACE // UGG TAZZ SLIPPERS

SUNDAY BEST: VERONICA BEARD BLAZER // MADEWELL JEANS // SOLDOUT NYC TEE (15% OFF WITH MAGPIE15) // CHANEL FLATS // TORY BURCH ROMY TOTE

P.S. If you could go back to school tomorrow, what would you study?

P.P.S. A bit of fiction for a Friday.

P.P.P.S. Quince favorites.

This past week, my friend Caroline Lunne wrote a beautiful musing on how fear can be a sign of big things coming — a precursor to “divinity,” in her words. It made me think of a quote about how success is often on the other side of fear — something I’ve found to be true in life. Some adjacent encouragement and reassurance if you’re navigating daunting moments of change or pressure yourself:

If it feels hard, it is hard. While I was on the stationery bike this week, the instructor said: “If it feels hard right now, it should.” Wow — a message I would do well to internalize in realms beyond just fitness. In parenting, in business, in writing, in family life: if it feels hard, it’s because it is hard. You’re not doing anything wrong. It’s not harder just for you. It’s because a lot of the worthwhile stuff in life requires elbow grease. I’m thinking of this one time I called my brother in tears about my daughter’s willfulness, and said, “God, what am I doing wrong?” and he said: “Nothing. This is is parenthood, and it’s hard.” I really needed to hear the message again this week. I am navigating a lot of different projects, plans, and inputs right now in my professional and personal life and have been feeling under the water. I’m doing what I love; it’s all good stuff — why do I feel like a drowning rat? It feels hard because it is hard. Related: I keep a post-it note on my desk that reads: “Good writing is hard work. A clear sentence is no accident.” This is true in so many realms. A great presentation is no accident. A pleasant customer experience is no accident. Etc.

Let positivity into the boat. On the spiritual side of Caroline’s post, one thing I think about when I experience fear in a particular situation comes from a parable whose details are honestly a little fuzzy to me, but whose message rings crystal-clear. In the story, Jesus tells a fisherman how and where to fish — but first He asks to be let in the boat. When I am worried about something, I lean on that visual: just let Him in the boat. You aren’t alone here. But you’ve got to open up to let faith aboard. I think this is true of positive thinking as well. Let positivity into the boat; let optimism into the boat.

Right before you level up, there is a moment where everything feels misaligned. One thing I have absolutely found to be true in moments of big transition: right before you make it to the next level of growth, there is always a moment where everything feels chaotic, alien, and out of sync. It’s unnerving. It makes you want to crawl back to comfort. But things have to fall apart in order to give way to the next phase. To give a narrow example: I have been writing a lot about how, in entrepreneurship, you should do everything yourself until you become the bottleneck, and then pass off the task. This is easier said than done. It is excruciating to give up control over something you’ve poured your heart and soul into. You may even be deluded into believing you are the only person capable of completing the task to your own high standards (I am guilty of this). And the process of finding and then training someone to do what you’ve been doing proficiently yourself for as long as you can remember requires a lot of energy, time, and patience. It doesn’t happen overnight; there is a learning curve, and there may always be a gap between your expectations and their delivery. During that baton-passing period, things feel chaotic and warped. You may be thinking, “This is a waste of time and effort; I can do this all more quickly and cheaply myself.” But once you’ve made it through that period of misalignment, you have a new pocket of time to dedicate to higher priority issues, tasks, etc. You’ve leveled up.

And while we’re talking reassurances, a Magpie reader left a comment on this post about the acute agony of setting boundaries in a fraught relationship, and navigating the painful aftermath. She wrote:

“Occasionally when feeling a deep emotion, I’ll search your site to see if you have written about it. Today I searched the word “mistake” and found this balm of an essay. I’ve been deep in a days-long anxiety attack where I am worrying over and over a decision I made to stand up for myself, and drowning in self-retribution and shame. This essay felt like a balm. There are no answers – just the comfort of knowing I’m not alone, at least.”

This is of course one of the top compliments I have ever received. It brings me a sense of profound purpose and comfort to know that there are other women navigating similar straits, and looking for someone else to squeeze their hand, and finding me somehow. Solidarity! In that vein, sharing a couple of posts I’ve written over the years to offer myself comfort in moments of strain in the hopes that they might be easier to find in list form here:

+If you are on the eve of making a big decision that you’re unsure about: You’re gonna love it.

+You’re running thin on patience for something to happen: It’s all part of the process, this natural unfolding of things, in which you are always only on your one correct path. Also, everything happens in its own perfect time.

+If you’ve made a mistake: In life, you will always make more tracks than necessary. (As Anais Nin put it: “In life, you will make mistakes, and those, too, are correct.) Remember that every good life includes mistakes, bad break ups, closed doors, and more unpleasantness; don’t return the groceries with the cart. Finally, give yourself a soft landing.

+If you are frazzled and flustered by the demands of motherhood: You’re where you need to be.

+If you’ve just lost a pet: Grief is a permutation of love; it is nothing to be scared of.

+If you are about to lose a pet: These are the good ol days; let me press them to my heart.

+If you’ve just set boundaries in a tough relationship: Time will help you let out the seams.

+If you are struggling through a tough period of any kind: You will find calmer seas. Everything is a flowing.

+If you feel frustrated by you proficiency in something, or can’t close the gap between your aspirations and your performance: We are in a constant state of rewriting. Keep going; today is not the final version. Sub niche: encouragement for creatives.

+If you feel hemmed in: You can start anything today, and with no one’s permission.

+If someone makes you feel small: No need to “play it cool” — chase what makes you lean forward and the people that matter will stick around, and probably love you for it. Also: at least you tried! And let them be wrong about you!

+If things feel bleak: fortunately, today is not the final draft–and there are lots of little things to celebrate.

+And finally, a sort of catch-all comfort: the words we’d say to our 20 year old selves. Which more or less boil down to: “It’s all going to be OK.”

Last but not least, I wanted to share two posts I came across on Instagram that I found deeply reassuring this week:

“Actually life is beautiful and I do have the time” from @madebyaub

Going to keep this post-it on my planner — a good antidote to the usual “OMG I have so much to do!”

Reassurances for a rainy day from Lyndsay Rush

She just about covered it!

Shopping Break.

This post may contain affiliate links. If you make a purchase through the links below, I may receive compensation.

+Earlier this week, I wore my new Veronica Beard denim eyelet blazer (she’s so gorgeous IRL) and got so many compliments on her. Saved to my secret shopping Pinterest board this week: this denim eyelet overshirt, which has a similar ethos, but is $59.

+I absolutely love the head to toe look they styled with the overshirt — these matching jeans. The hem detail is so fun. So chic, and the entire look is $110.

+Several Magpie readers have recommended this $59 set as a great look for less for my go-to Frank and Eileen.

+You need to know about J. Crew’s new arrivals. This cutaway vest is a must. I absolutely love the look of this style of waistcoat/vest. (I have been getting so much wear out of my denim version from VB!)

+Also absolutely love this white skirt from their new arrivals. A more polished/less boho alternative to my Sebastiane skirt, and $128!

+Finally, this bag!!! Adorable.

+Target just released adorable cabbage motif dishes in time for our spring/Easter tables! Love this mug and this plate.

+I just went to Vuori to buy another one of their featherweight Energy tees (truly the best — I always reach for it first when its clean) and suddenly filled my cart with like five other items: these shorts; this feather tee; this oversized hoodie; this sports bra. I want it all!

+Fun date night top on its way to me.

+My dear friend Inslee just launched a collection with Pink Chicken! The sweetest dresses, pajamas, and separates for children adorned with her whimsical art. I adore this dress.

+Constantly looking for ways to add hydration to my skin. Just discovered this rose cleansing oil that intrigued me from a new-to-me beauty brand.

+Gorgeous pink polo sweater.

+Goop just gave us a 15% off code for their house labels in beauty and fashion — SHOOP15. All my Goop beauty favorites here, and from the new fashion collection, I think I need this dress.

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I have been leaning hard into pastels the past few weeks. It started with the butter yellow Pistola sweater I’ve been wearing a lot recently and now I can’t stop! I’ve also been enjoying styling this gorgeous Favorite Daughter crewneck in the prettiest shell pink (seen above with my Dehanche belt, Mother half pipe jeans, Tory Burch bag, and a $69 gray sweater around my shoulders). It has a slightly boxy / loose modern fit with extra long cuffs. I am also drawn to Doen’s Penrose style and their gorgeous Freya Cashmere Cardigan, too — or you can go with my look-for-less from Tuckernuck.

Some street style inspo:

Pastel Sweaters at Different Pricepoints.

TOP: DOEN FREYA CARDIGAN // FINE GAUGE KNITTED CARDIGAN // LILAC CASHMERE RELAXED CREW SWEATER // ICE BLUE CASHMERE SWEATER

BOTTOM: J. CREW RIBBED CASHMERE CROPPED SWEATER // DOEN PENROSE CARDIGAN // ARITZIA SONDER SWEATER // POINTELLE CREWNECK

Outfit Inspo: Pastel Knits.

PENROSE CARDIGAN // 501 90S ANKLE WOMENS JEANS // FATHOM FLAT // DALIA BAGUETTE BAG (LOOK FOR LESS HERE) // SEDONA SUNGLASSES // SAMIRA HOOPS

CLASSIC CREW LIGHT HEATHERED MOSS // LE SLIM PALAZZO HIGH RISE JEANS // FRESH BUDS SCARF // DOVE NAPA FLATS // MANSUR GAVRIEL BAG // BABY KNOT EARRINGS

POINTELLE CREWNECK // BARB WIDE LEG PANT // MARTINEZ DOVE NAPA FLAT // BLOCKED CAT EYE SUNGLASSES // T-LOCK SMALL LEATHER CLUTCH (LOOK FOR LESS HERE) // BEANIE EARRINGS // PUFFY CUFF

FREYA CASHMERE CARDIGAN // TAYLOR HIGH RISE WIDE LEG JEAN // SILENT D SEENA SNEAKERS // ALVA BIG BAG // TANER HOOPS // SUEDE ROLLER BUCKLE BELT // WORK IT SUNGLASSES

P.S. Serena + Lily Vibes for Less

P.P.S. Nordstrom Sale Picks

P.P.P.S. Zara Finds

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Above, wearing: J. Crew Factory jeans, Pistola sweater, Celine sunglasses, Tory Burch bag.

I’ve never subscribed to the narrative of no-white-after-labor-day. I style white all year round and am currently eyeing a few new pairs. I’ve been getting a lot of wear out of these $49 wide leg crop jeans and am also contemplating this barrel pair from Everlane after seeing them on Shannon Pulsifer (a fellow petite; note that the jeans come in two inseam lengths). A little pricier, but I’m also eyeing these Ren High Rise Wide Leg Jeans by Agolde. The stark white is fun to style with a pop of color or basic black for a clean and modern look.

Street Style Inspo: White Denim for Spring.

Below, some spring white and ecru denim inspo —

My Top Picks for Spring White Denim Silhouettes.

MADEWELL PERFECT VINTAGE WIDE LEG CROP // WIDE LEG CROP JEAN // REN HIGH RISE WIDE LEG JEAN // EVERLANE WAY HIGH BARREL JEANS

I should also mention that last season, these wide leg crops from SLVRLAKE were among my most worn, and this winter, I’ve been wearing these half pipes from Mother at least once a week (that curved seam down the leg is incredibly flattering). Both great options to consider as well.

Outfit Inspo – Styling White Jeans.

RIBBED CASHMERE CROPPED SWEATER // REN HIGH RISE WIDE LEG JEAN // PENNY SLIPPERS IN GLAZED LEATHER (LOOK FOR LESS HERE) // NEW FINCH TRENCH COAT // SMALL TOTE IN GRAIN CALFSKIN (LOOK FOR LESS HERE) // RUSSELL OVAL SUNGLASSES // DEHANCHE BELT // FAWN SILVER

THE SLOUCH COAT // CASHMERE OVERSIZED SWEATER // REN HIGH RISE WIDE LEG JEAN // PREMIER BASEBALL CAP // CANDY HOBO // TRIOMPHE OVAL SUNGLASSES // VALENTINA SNEAKER COBBLESTONE

TANNER TRENCH COAT (LOOK FOR LESS HERE) // OVERSIZED TAILORED SHIRT // CASHMERE OVERSIZED SWEATER // REN HIGH RISE WIDE LEG JEAN // ARCHER VANILLA NAPA // MINI LEATHER HANDBAG (LOOK FOR LESS HERE) // DREAM LOVER SUNGLASSES

ZOE VNECK SWEATER (ON SALE!) // REN HIGH RISE WIDE LEG JEAN // CUYANA NEW DOUBLE LOOP TOTE // LESET MARGO TEE // PRUDENCE BALLET FLAT // CAT EYE SUNGLASSES (LOOK FOR LESS HERE) // NEW FINCH TRENCH COAT

P.S. My Veronica Beard new arrival picks.

P.P.S. Long days of parenting. (Been there…)

P.P.P.S. The very busy spider.

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A few favorite spring finds from one of my favorite retailers, Tuckernuck. I just tested this, and the code YOUROCK still gets you 20% off sitewide. (Happy shopping!)

Above, I’m wearing the most gorgeous cashmere cardigan in the prettiest shell pink from their house collection. I’ve gotten a surprising amount of wear out of it already! I like it paired with pastels, white or lighter wash denim, black, gray, etc. Above, wearing it with this pretty pendant from Thatch Jewelry, a great pair of everyday jeans, and a pointelle tee.

COCO SHOP DRESS // NINA FLATS // WOVEN KNOT STUDS // WHITE BUTTON DOWN // CHIC BELT // DRAGON DIFFUSION BAG // MOTHER JEANS // SHELL PINK CASHMERE CARDI // YELLOW EYELET SKIRT // WHITE LACE CAFTAN DRESS

01. Obsessed with this pretty dress from Coco Shop. Easter dress contender for me.

02. This gorgeous and versatile white lace caftan dress has been a bestseller among Magpies the past week or two.

03. These under-$200 flats have such a high-end look.

04. Fun everyday chambray dress.

05. We all adore this top. I own it in the blue and white stripe – love the structure. White would be so versatile for spring.

06. Such a fun top for date night / gals night.

07. Obsessed with this Dragon Diffusion tote in every color.

07. Pretty $110 eyelet skirt in my favorite color du jour (more butter yellow here).

08. This on-trend belt reminds me a lot of my Dehanche, which is like 3x the price.

09. These Rupert Sanderson heels have me drooling.

10. Classic white jeans.

11. Pretty spring studs to wear with everything.

12. A gorgeous cashmere cardi in the perfect pink shade.

P.S. In case you need to hear it today: you are enough, and you are not a project.

P.P.S. What do you keep in you guest bedroom?

P.P.P.S. Moondances of different kinds.

Image via.

Ed. note: This post originally had a different title, which unintentionally replicated a quote from a social activist. I apologize for this oversight and am grateful to Magpies for bringing this to my attention. Updating with a new title and fresh copy.

Over the weekend, I picked up a memoir written by one of my father-in-law’s best friends, Terrell Tannen. In it, Mr. Tannen explores the challenges and successes of his career as a highly-paid Hollywood screenwriter and specifically examines fame in all its corrosive and rewarding qualities. I am less than a quarter of the way in, but I love the nimble way he writes and find his crisp insights applicable even to someone far afield of his line of work.

One of his lines leapt out at me. He’s talking about a brief stint during which he wrote obituaries for celebrated scientists in a major scientific periodical, and how, as a part of his reconnaissance, he’d interview peers and partners of the deceased. He explains that it was often difficult to get off the phone because many of the interviewees were passionate about the field, and aware that the interview might earn them billing in an important publication. He ends with: “But it was good trouble.”

Welcome inconveniences!

Landon and I often talk about this concept in different terms. When we are complaining about interruptions and challenges, sometimes we’ll take a step back and realize that our “inconvniences” are in fact signals of growth, or wellness. Just a few weeks ago, I saw someone on Instagram (I think it was Caroline Chambers) write: “You know you’ve made it when the Instagram trolls come for you.” Ha!

But there it is — welcome inconveniences.

And then there is the other flavor of this concept — the irrational things you do for love. One college summer early into our relationship, Landon was waiting tables at a pizza restaurant in Arlington, VA, and he would finish his shift at 11 or 11:30 at night and then drive 20 minutes to my parents’ home in N.W. DC. We would spend maybe thirty drowsy minutes together before he’d drive home. I remember him saying, “it’s no trouble at all,” but of course it was. To be so in love you’d drive forty punishing minutes at the end of a long, physical shift of work for a kiss and conversation? A welcome inconvenience.

A few other examples of “welcome inconveniences”:

Having to replace running shoes because the treads are low (or any fitness gear worn out by heavy use)

Staying up until two a.m. because you can’t put your book down

Selling out of something you’ve made

Losing track of time while creating or talking to a good friend

Discovering you’re the bottleneck and that you need to hire someone to handle something instead

Being told to “keep it down” because you’re laughing too loudly

Internet trolls (you know you’ve made it when…)

Paying a late fee or cancellation fee because you prioritized something important over something scheduled

Feedback (always a gift)

A messy kitchen counter (evidence of a full, thriving household)

Inventing problems just to spend time with someone you like

Needing to upgrade your plan from “basic” to “pro”

Running late because you waited for your child to do something on his own

Releasing version 2.0

Anything you love that takes up more space than the world wants to make for it

What else would you add to this list?

Post-Scripts.

+Bad days and blank pages.

+How to fill your cup in an under an hour.

+How do you make your mornings easier?

Shopping Break.

This post may contain affiliate links. If you make a purchase through the links below, I may receive compensation.

+I’m in love with Lake’s new spring arrivals. I can’t help it – I’m addicted – but the prints are so pretty and auspicious. I picked this pima set specifically because the pattern reminded me of one of my favorite “happy corners” of my home – seen below (I was wearing my new Doen skirt, look for less here, and Birks!). I also love the pattern on this robe (in the French blue color option) and might order it, too.

+Elemis gave us a 20% off code — use JEN20. Great way to save on our favorite nighttime ritual: this cleansing balm. I’m actually currently using the fig version of their cleansing balm and really enjoy it, too. When I was using it last night, I thought to myself: if I were to come up with a list of “little things that make life better,” this would be on it. It is truly such a relaxing, nourishing part of my unwind process at the end of the day.

+Love these under-$200 flats, which remind me a lot of styles from higher end brands like Le Monde Beryl.

+Sweetest $15 swimsuit for your little lady.

+Chic raffia and leather tote.

+Fun transition-to-spring jacket. Also love their gingham rain jacket!

+Don’t ask me why, but I love buying new pens and highlighters. Just got these.

+Love the look of this classic outdoor chaise (at a great price).

+Zimmermann magic.

+Speaking of, The Outnet often has a really great collection of discounted Zimmermann. See here (pair with a simple white tee and leather sandal), here, and here!

+Always a classic. I have several of these in different sizes and use them constantly for toting packages, kids gear, books, etc! Get them personalized with a funny nickname, slogan, or initials.

+This top reminds me of the Zara ecru macrame jacket I bought last season and have already pulled out again this year, but much better-quality. You can style this as a jacket over a tank, or as a top in its own right. Super elegant and versatile.

+Elegant spring heeled sandal.

+Favorite fancy candy.