Last year, I asked how you reset for the week, and was surprised to hear a wide range of perspectives. Some of you take Sunday to handle laundry, grocery, meal prep, and cleaning, so you can hit the ground running come the start of the week. Others take the weekend to rest and use Monday as a reset day. And still others are somewhere between, with just laundry or just the grocery as the big ticket achievements for the weekend, and the rest carved out for family time. The conversation opened my mind. I suppose I’d forgotten that the calendar is a construct. As one Magpie reader put it: “you can start a new 24 hour cycle at any time” — i.e., you don’t need to wait for the stroke of midnight, or Monday morning, or Friday evening for that matter, to turn a new leaf or take a break.
I used to hit Monday morning and grapple with the sensation of already being behind. The start of the week was a sprint: I was racing to get through all of the house admin that I’d left unattended over the weekend so that I could “dig in” in earnest. I was a video game avatar, bursting her way through walls, leaping and flipping in the air, while frenetic music played in the background and the time ticked down in the lower right hand corner. In the best way, that conversation last year loosened something in me. I thought, “Maybe I don’t have to ‘hit the ground running’ on Monday? Maybe I just need to begin as I mean to continue. Maybe Monday is not a catch-up day, but a designated time to regroup and thoughtfully move through the things on my admin list that need to get done.” Why is it that we tend to categorize household admin as after-thought, “other,” ancillary — to be wedged in wherever — when in fact it is a part of the core architecture of our lives? I might be nursing heartbreak of any color and shape, and still my children will need their lunches packed and their soccer uniforms cleaned for the Saturday game.
In short, I’ve now come to think of Monday as a reset day and Tuesday as a clip-in day. This reframe has relaxed and empowered me in stirring ways. I feel much more in control of my own pace. Any time I feel that frenzied energy stirring, I repeat that mantra we’ve discussed so many times here on Magpie: your direction is more important than your speed. Which, in this case, makes me think: slow down and be intentional. Let this Monday be what it is. Let it be a place and time to stretch and exercise, clear the inbox, order the birthday gifts, coordinate on sitter logistics, sort through the mail, handle returns and errands, clear my desk. In turn, let Tuesday be Tuesday.
I recognize that I have a particularly flexible schedule and that this reframe may not be available to or practical for women with more traditional jobs. However, one of my girlfriends is a senior executive in the financial services industry, and she has her own twist on my “Monday reset” concept: she calls it “Bare Minimum Mondays.” She purposefully works from home on those days so she can get caught up on laundry and household org, avoids scheduling meetings, and handles what needs to get done at work without overextending herself. My husband used to have a team rule along these lines: no meetings on Mondays or Fridays. The intent was to block out “maker’s time,” but also to accommodate a better work-life balance.
When I zoom out, I see “Gentle Start Mondays” as a manifestation of the grace I am attempting to give myself as I make my way through this fourth decade of my life. It is a mnemonic for taking my foot off the accelerator I seem pre-programmed to depress at the start of the week. Yes, I can take up space. Yes, I can hit pause. Yes, I can be deliberate even when the world seems to court my most expeditious self. I am not an ornament to my own life; I am not here as window dressing or ingredient. I am here to experience this life in its finest-grained detail, and I can’t do that while careening around at 70mph. I want to be schmaltzy about the trees in my backyard because I’ve had time to walk by and notice them. I want to sit with my boy in my arms without the nipping feeling of needing to switch the laundry. These are impractical thoughts. These are whimsical, self-indulgent desires. Or are they? I keep thinking about my 80 year old self. What will she regret having not done? I think I know the answer, and it takes the shape of a slow morning, of drinking her coffee while hot, of pausing a conversation to comment on the lavender bowl of the twilight sky, of bearing patient witness to her son painstakingly decorating a pumpkin (in Sharpie, while wearing a brand new sweater — eek) after Church even when we had places to be. (Can you tell this happened yesterday, and that I engaged in hand-to-hand combat with that internal call to celerity, and that I ultimately imaged my 80 year old self and let my son finish?)
So then, let me slowly, gently unfold into this day —
Post-Scripts.
+Fortunately —
+It’s just that — life is short.
Shopping Break.
+My usual Monday morning “reset” ritual: Peloton with my Dad and sisters, enjoy coffee hot and slow (preferably outside), apply a mask, take an everything shower, put on an outfit that makes me feel good, fill out my weekly planning pad with just 2-3 top level goals per day. I’ve mentioned this several times this month, but this is my current favorite “reset” mask. You can use as a cleanser or you can leave on your skin for 10 minutes. It gives me that “clean slate” feeling. The tabula rasa mask – lol. If I want something more invigorating, I love this one, which feels like a cold plunge.
+This perfect holiday dress launched last week and already sold out in the green. I have the cranberry in my cart…
+I keep hearing people rave about Citizens’ spendy Miro sweats. Has anyone tried? I’ve seen them styled with cool sneakers, luxe white tee, and a cashmere cardigan over top and kind of loved the effect?! Looks for less here, here.
+Speaking of Citizens/denim: Shopbop discounted a bunch of great styles from great denim brands, including Agolde’s Riley and Citizen’s Charlotte — both of which I own and love. Great everyday jeans in everyday washes. I’m tempted by these (in the same silhouette as the aformentioned barrel-leg sweats!)
+I did buy these leopard sneakers with the red laces. LOVE.
+Everyone’s favorite statement top in a new berry red for the holiday season. This is such a great piece to pair with jeans or leather pants for an easy festive look.
+The Great vibes for less! (Compare with.)
+Been wearing this scoat in the cocoa color all week! It’s REALLY good IRL — the material is soft and pliable (moreso than other wool coats I’ve had from J. Crew) and the color is exceptional. Speaking of J. Crew, love this printed scarf in the burgundy/pink bandana motif.
+If you love this Me+Em, try this look for less.
+Speaking of Me+Em — OMG, new arrivals: this velvet dress with detachable bow (!), this Chanel-inspired jacket, these velour trousers in that olive color (for Thanksgiving!)
+My new holiday jammies. The pattern is so sweet! Meanwhile, these cashmere track pants in burgundy are FAB…!!!
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