It’s the little things in life, right?! I recently had to part ways with this memory foam bath mat, which I absolutely adored for several months and then could not stand. On the pro side, it was the dreamiest feeling to climb out of a warm shower onto that plush, soft cushion. On the con side, it was next to impossible to clean. You *can* put it in the washing machine but then it’s always a hassle to balance with other heavy items (like towels) so it doesn’t make the washing machine sound like it’s dying. I also found that even when properly balanced in a load, it came out still looking not quite clean enough. So, I’m in the market for a new bath mat or two, this time more washing-machine friendly…
I HAVE ALWAYS LOVED JONATHAN ADLER’S WHIMSICAL ZEBRA MAT (LOOK FOR LESS WITH THIS) — OUR MASTER BED/BATH IS SO UNDERSTATED AND CIVILIZED; MAYBE THIS WOULD ADD A LITTLE TOUCH OF THE FRIVOLOUS
Ah! I’ve never been big into athleisure but I have to say I’ve been living in my expanding collection of sweatshirts this year. I have been loving this J. Crew sweatshirt in the camel over turtlenecks with light-wash denim, this lightweight hoodie for layering under coats, and this Isabel Marant in the ecru color with any wash denim.
Weekend Musings: Valarie Kaur, Self-Love, and the Community.
Earlier this week, I stumbled across an excerpt by Valarie Kaur, an author, civil rights attorney, and filmmaker, that I’ve been sitting with since:
“Loving only ourselves is escapism; loving only our opponents is self-loathing; loving only others is ineffective. All three practices together make love revolutionary.”
Kaur is talking about big and sweeping things here that feel a little daunting on a Saturday morning, eliciting something of the backwards stagger I experience when thinking about outer space and some of the mysteries of the Catholic faith. (What does she mean by “loving only others is ineffective”? I strain at that notion, though I understand on a functional level that it would be impossible to entirely give to others without tending to oneself.) But I thought it was a stirring extension to or inversion of something a Magpie wrote in response to my ambling musings on the often co-opted concept of “self-care“: Joyce wrote, “It can feel like we are being told to ‘self care’ our way out of…injustices or simply areas of life where we need outside help. (Personal example: childcare.)”. Both Kaur and Joyce are grappling with the conditions of self-love within a community — but from opposite sides of the telescope.
Any thoughts, or do you need your coffee first? (Ha. Bringing down the hammer at 5 a.m. on a Saturday over here.)
I’m devastated I missed out on these bejeweled holiday mules in my size in the green velvet (seen above), but signed up for the restock notification. Talk about a dreamy holiday shoe for a chic Christmas morning! (Why am I imagining myself in this feather-trim satin house dress situation while wearing them, with an enormous cocktail ring and a martini in hand? Haha)
PERSONALIZED KNIT HAT FOR A BABY. A girlfriend gave me one of these for Hill and it is one of my most treasured possessions. TBBC also has super cute ones.
RUNNING JACKET. Literally obsessed with this one by New Balance (on super sale). Thin but warm — incredible at regulating my temperature.
DAY PLANNER. I have been loving this undated planning pad for adding to-dos to tick off each day. Bonus: I’m a leftie, and there’s no binding to contend with.
MATERNITY LEGGINGS.These. Pricey but worth it. They hold their shape and never get saggy or threadbare despite infinite washings.
STAIN REMOVER. I get this question *a lot* because I am often seen wearing white denim/cropped trousers in Instastories. I have found the best treatment for a spot is hot water and a little bit of Palmolive dish soap, applied directly and as quickly as possible in a dabbing motion. As a back-up, less powerful but still quite good, Dreft Stain Spray.
MARY JANES FOR LITTLE GIRL. My favorite for years has been Elephantito. They are nice and sturdy for new walkers but I love the styling — laser cut eyelet trim and pearlescent button! Also come in great colors and feature a velcro fastener. Just the best and built to last. These are easily the kind of shoe you hand down to littler cousins, siblings, etc. I also bought this under-$20 pair for mini in gold to go with a specific outfit and though the quality is nowhere near Elephantito, I like that they are a kind of soft, bendable material (easy to slip onto the foot) and of course the scalloping is darling.
CARDIGANS FOR A LITTLE GIRL. I usually buy J. Crew’s Casey in navy and ivory/white each season when on sale (currently 50% off!). FYI – these run small. They are simple, a nice weight, unfussy, and the price is right. I have also bought ones from Jacadi that have more interesting details like scalloped trim and pom poms (mini has owned both of these styles), but they are pricier and I find more difficult to launder. The J. Crew style can be tossed into the laundry with no sweat!
UNDERWEAR ORGANIZER.This transformed my underwear drawer!
LAUNDRY DETERGENT. I’ve tried so many but continue to come back to Tide. Nothing else seems quite as effective.
The coffee table has long been one of my favorite sites for home styling and aesthetic expression. Over the years, I have constantly re-configured this surface, adding new objects and books, zhushing with flowers, etc. Nowadays, I often keep the coffee table more or less clear because it’s just the right height for the prying eyes and hands of my two children, but that doesn’t mean I don’t have grand intentions for it in the near future. (And, occasionally, I will trot out the votives, transfer flowers hosted elsewhere in the apartment, and style my coffee table just for my evening enjoyment.). Below, a few of my favorite coffee tables followed by some ultra-chic coffee table adornments.
*Heads up: Today (November 12th) only, Boll & Branch is offering 20% off sitewide! Discount is applied at checkout. I mention my beloved sheeting AND bed blanket below — great opportunity to buy for yourself or as a gift.
Like all of you, I have spent far more time at home than I have in my entire life this year, and it has given rise to some intense organization projects as well as a new appreciation for the absolute best gear at home. Below, sharing my favorite items for a comfortable and well-maintained home:
MIELE VACUUM // Trust me when I say this is the place to invest. I had been getting by with a cordless option and with a dog, children, and heavy foot traffic in our tiny apartment, an upgrade to a proper Miele was the absolute best thing I could have done for everyone. It is so powerful, has multiple settings (for rugs, upholstered furniture, hardwood floors), and is brilliantly designed. These are built to last. Absolutely worth every penny. I also remember doing a lot of research to figure out the difference between their various models/lines, which are very confusing and unnecessary in my opinion, and this is the exact model I landed on: the perfect balance between utility/versatility for different floors and price.
SIMPLE HUMAN RECYCLER (ALSO AVAIL ON AMAZON) // A well-designed and sleek-looking divided recycler big enough for all the glassware, plastic, and cardboard we go through in our busy family. I specifically love the plastic “liner” bin that enables me to easily lift that piece out and carry it to the bigger recycling bins in our building. It also opens with the tap of a foot, the lid can be clicked into an upright position when removing the bag/bin, and the brushed stainless steel exterior means that it’s fairly resistant to smudges and fingerprints.
RUG PADS // These extend the life of your rug, protect your floors, add cushioning, and — most importantly — prevent rug slippage/movement. When I finally bought these for all of the rugs in my home, I felt like I’d crossed a new threshold into adulthood. (My favorite rugs here.)
PHILIPS HUE BULBS // We have, over time, as bulbs have died, installed Philips Hue bulbs in most of the lights in our home. These are controlled via our smartphones (and Siri, via our HomePod), where we have them configured to turn on and dim on a schedule that mirrors our lifestyle. It feels like the future to walk into a room and say: “Hey Siri, turn on the lights in the master bedroom,” and suddenly they are on. Or “Hey Siri, dim the dining room lights to 30%” and all of the lights go down to a romantic candlelit effect. You can also change the warmth/color of the lights. Often we like really bright light in the morning, but warm yellow tones in the evening. The starter kit might make a great gift for a new homeowner or a tech-loving friend.
EERO WIFI MESH NETWORK // Has given us the gift of faster, more reliable, and easier-to-monitor Internet. This replaces your old WiFi router and includes an app that enables you to track Internet speed, which has been handy whenever there has been an issue with the provider. (We can just show the discrepancy between the speed they promise and the speed we are getting.). Bonus: it looks good and the beacons double as nightlights.
O-CEDAR SPONGES // These are the best sponges I’ve ever used. They are thick, sturdy, absorbent, non-scratch, and they also bend/give nicely. Can you tell I spend a lot of time washing dishes? (We cook A LOT at home!)
OXO SHOWER CADDY // A strange thing to love, but this is just so well-designed! It never slips/slides around, has shelves at the perfect height (tall enough for most shampoo bottles), a hook for a loofah, and a soap tray.
TOSCA STORAGE BINS // J’adore these (dare I say it?) elegant bins for housing bulkier items in our pantry section.
UNDERBED SHOE STORAGE // Fellow women short on closet space: these have been my saving grace. The thing I love best about them is that they are very shallow in height, and my bed affords the slightest of underbed clearance! This was one of the only models I could find that would actually fit under the bed. I like that they keep all my beloved shoes dust and debris-free!
WHITE UTILITY BINS // Used for countless purposes in every closet I have. Great for organizing spices, holding dog gear, housing “backstock” lightbulbs and batteries, etc. Inexpensive, easy to clean, waterproof. (These are great for under-sink areas for that reason, too.)
MICROFIBER CLEANING TOWELS // I bought these begrudgingly when, after we’d fully moved out of our former apartment, I returned to supervise a crew of housekeepers to conduct a deep clean of the emptied apartment, per our lease. When I arrived, after unpleasantly schlepping a ton of gear and supplies on the Subway, I realized I’d forgotten rags to clean with. I dashed out to the local Bed, Bath, and Beyond, and they only had these. WOW. What a happy accident — these are a fantastic tool to clean with. I love that they dust even delicate surfaces (like porcelain, TV screens, Mr. Magpie’s expensive acoustics equipment) but can also be used with cleaning products on wood, marble, glass, etc. They are also deceptively absorbent without ever becoming sopping wet. I don’t understand where the liquid goes! Anyhow, they are fantastic!
BROTHER LABELMAKER // I use this vigor and joy. So handy for spice jars (label the tops!), drawers of the acrylic cube I use to organize first aid and medicine, and even the white bins above (i.e., LIGHTBULBS, DOG GEAR, etc.). No question about where things belong. (If you’re not a labelmaker kind of gal, these pre-written tags covering many common pantry items might be your ticket.)
ROWENTA IRON // Just the absolute best. I thought I was “bad” at ironing until I bought this iron.
BOLL AND BRANCH SHEETING AND BED BLANKET // I know this feels more “design” than “utility,” but these sheets truly enhanced our sleeping experience. They are cool and ultra-soft, and the blanket is one of my absolute favorite items I’ve bought this year. Ultra-soft and warm and just the perfect weight.
XTREME COMFORTS MEMORY FOAM PILLOWS // Just try it. It is like heaven! You can remove the fill to your liking, but this pillow never gets hot and always feels like a dream.
STORI PLASTIC ORGANIZERS // Love these in my cabinets and drawers for keeping everything organized/jumble-free.
*Image above of the stunning Halima wearing a major look by By Fang.
In one of the greatest compliments of my life, my brother-in-law once said that I dress myself “like a present.” I knew what he meant, too: ever the Magpie, I am always drawn to bows, ribbons, jewels, add-ons, details, dramatic proportions, embellishments. If I were a present, I’d be wrapped to the high heavens with a wide, white satin bow. Below, a few Magpie-like pieces I love…
P.P.P.S. Moving to revisit this piece when we were still so early into the pandemic.
By: Jen Shoop
Per several reader requests, a couple of ideas on edible gifts this year. I want to kick off this list with Scars and Stripes, a coffee purveyor run by veterans of the US military to which a Magpie reader just introduced me a few days ago (thank you, April!). Kismet — as today is Veteran’s Day. You can read more about the company’s novel approach to supporting veterans here.
It seems like yesterday But it was long ago Janey was lovely; she was the queen of my nights There in the darkness with the radio playing low, and And the secrets that we shared The mountains that we moved Caught like a wildfire out of control ‘Til there was nothing left to burn and nothing left to prove And I remember what she said to me How she swore that it never would end I remember how she held me oh-so-tight Wish I didn’t know now what I didn’t know then
Against the wind We were runnin’ against the wind We were young and strong, we were runnin’ against the wind
The years rolled slowly past And I found myself alone Surrounded by strangers I thought were my friends I found myself further and further from my home, and I Guess I lost my way There were oh-so-many roads I was living to run and running to live Never worried about paying or even how much I owed Moving eight miles a minute for months at a time Breaking all of the rules that would bend I began to find myself searching Searching for shelter again and again
Against the wind A little something against the wind I found myself seeking shelter against the wind
Well those drifter’s days are past me now I’ve got so much more to think about Deadlines and commitments What to leave in, what to leave out
Against the wind I’m still runnin’ against the wind I’m older now but still runnin’ against the wind
-Bob Seger
I love everything about this Bob Seger song — the lyrics, the instrumentation, the grit and soul in his voice, the way he (as he often does in his other songs) manages to paint a sweeping story with true shape and color and mouthfeel in the sparsest of details, the poignant note of enlightened resignation he hits. It’s made its way onto my running playlist in the past few weeks, and it always leaves me contemplative.
The song speaks principally to me about moving through life with self-possession and making peace with the myriad forms of resistance we encounter while doing so. Especially in moments of major transition and enterprise in my life, I have occasionally felt as though constrained by invisible forces pushing me toward inertia. “Stay in your place!” those forces shout. “Do not do that thing!” Do not move states, do not take that new job, do not start that new business, do not have that second child. Sometimes these exhortations take the shape of “deadlines and commitments,” but other times they emerge in more emotionally tortuous ways, like the not intentionally unkind but still-wounding dismissal of my pursuits in various ways by friends and loved ones. With age, I have learned not to carry grudges or grievances along these lines and to trust that most people are simply preoccupied with their own circuits and — to borrow from Seger — the winds that assail them.
The key, I think Seger indicates, is to accept this resistance as a condition of living with integrity, and to cultivate the skill of discernment — learning “what to leave in, what to leave out,” when to lean into the wind and when to take shelter.
Interestingly, Seger had this to say about the lyrics:
“Janey says to me all the time, ‘You allow more people to walk on you than anybody I’ve ever known.’ And I always say it’s human nature that people are gonna love you sometimes and they’re gonna use you sometimes. Knowing the difference between when people are using you and when people truly care about you, that’s what “Against the Wind” is all about. The people in that song have weathered the storm, and it’s made them much better that they’ve been able to do it and maintain whatever relationship. To get through is a real victory.”
What do you think? Are you running against the wind right now?
+Sister Jane has such fun, playful little dresses out right now — love this!
+These beautiful cards would make another great stocking stuffer. I’m thinking specifically for my mother-in-law — we often play cards with my in-laws and these are so pretty!
+Finally, not on sale, but I am DEAD over this quilted velvet clutch (under $100). I’d remove the gold strap but it is giving me MAJOR Bottega vibes. Love love love love everything. Color, shape, quilting.
If you’re leaning into a festive but not-super-dressy Thanksgiving (or other fall/winter occasion) this year, a couple of looks to make your day feel special (I will be wearing this dress with burgundy velvet heels):
8 // Peplum Perfection. Love this top — it’s not in a traditional fall palette but it has such great autumnal florals in it. Also love this $66 score in the perfect brown shade.
And a couple of other random last-minute notes/finds for the occasion:
