*Image above via Therese Hellstrom. SO chic. Love the way she plays with color.

My Latest Snag(s): On-Trend Fall Finds.

First: I have been wearing this headband NONSTOP the last two weeks, and it is currently on sale for like $6!!!! A couple of fun, affordable finds I ordered this week for my fall wardrobe:

THIS DRAMATIC CARDIGAN WITH RHINESTONE BOW BUTTONS

THIS HOUNDSTOOTH MINI

THIS PADDED CORDUROY HEADBAND

Currently in my cart? This $119 pilgrim collar dress (seen above on Therese Hellstrom, transformed into a shirt) and this wool blanket scarf.

You’re Sooooo Popular: The Chic Fleece.

The most popular items on le blog this week:

+My favorite boxy fleece sweatshirt — I own in the oat color.

+This $29 flounce cableknit sweater.

+This ultra-chic longline cardigan.

+Darling flounced tunic dress — perfect for Thanksgiving/fall gatherings.

+This condiment server, which I use to serve up little nibbles at cocktail hour.

+Striped maxi dress — perfect with sneakers in fall.

+Chic cords.

+Knit shacket situation.

+Houndstooth baby carrier.

Weekend Musings: How Do You Take Care of Yourself?

A week or two ago, an astute Magpie reader left a comment asking my thoughts on “our culture’s tendency to treat moms having five minutes to take a shower like luxury/self care?” The comment left me deep in thought about the terms “self-care” and “wellness,” which, I have come to believe, mean both nothing and everything and must therefore be summarily excised from my vocabulary. I mean, the terms have become so dilute as to encompass concepts as disparate as meditation, dry brushing, and chia seeds. They’ve been co-opted by clever marketers who are banking on what I will call “the Goop subtext” — that is, the message that women everywhere live in a perennial state of not-good-enough-ness that requires remediation, treatment, tinctures and tonics. On the flipside, I don’t want to be too quick to denigrate Goop. Some of their podcasts have been eye-opening and stirring in ways that have engendered self-enlightenment. (“Why do I follow rules so carefully?”) And I think that at least some of their work on the “wellness” side has empowered listeners to be more proactive in seeking remedies to persistent problems. There is a sad and lengthy history of women presenting their symptoms only to be quieted and dismissed. Goop presents alternatives.

But, let’s set aside Goop for now, lest I unmeaningly write a 24-page treatise on the subject, though I am eager for your comments on the brand and also on the seemingly immaterial terms “self-care” and “wellness.” (Please share below!)

Today, I want to think more generally about things that make us feel — if not outright “good” — then “better.” This year, I have battled not only the flu but a nasty stomach bug and COVID-19. After those health travails, I have had to take a step back and ask what I can be doing to better protect myself and my immune system, especially because I was, candidly, put out by the number of people who asked me “but did you get the flu vaccine?” after I’d told them that I’d caught it (from caring for my daughter, who brought it home from school). The implication, it seemed to me, was that I was somehow at fault for having caught the flu (though yes, I did get the vaccine, and as early as possible, as I do every year). I think this sentiment has in part informed the protracted, uneasy sense of guilt I carry for having caught COVID-19 as well. Do other COVID-19 survivors feel the same way, I wonder? I still feel sick to my stomach over it. How could I have done this to my family and my community? How on earth did I catch it? I felt I was following every rule — masking, avoiding stores, washing hands, wiping down packages. Did I not wash my hands thoroughly enough one afternoon? Did someone cough on me while I was walking Tilly? I have spent hours lingering over these questions, lost in a bitter kind of shame. I cannot quite express the burn of delinquency I felt when I alerted the management of my building to my illness and texted my immediate neighbors with the same news. I felt I had failed them. One set of neighbors took to entering and exiting their apartment from the service entrance (i.e., further away from our front door) and though I could not blame them, I was mortified. The only thing I can say is thank God that neither my children nor my husband became symptomatic — a true miracle as we live in such tight quarters — because I don’t think I would have ever forgiven myself.

At any rate, I have been trying to double down on healthier habits — taking vitamins, exercising regularly, drinking more water, aiming for more sleep (so hard with young children and the desire for some time to myself in the evenings), but am curious to know — how do you care for yourself? Anything I should be doing? I’m game for anything — apple cider vinegar shots, hot water with lemon. Teach me!

A Special Cause: Good+ Foundation Partners with Maisonette.

I’ve mentioned recently how much I admire and support the meaningful work that The Good+ Foundation is doing, and wanted to share another way to get involved: Maisonette is currently running an incredible program where they will donate one item of clothing to families in need (distributed by the Good+ Foundation) for each item purchased from its house brand, Maison Me. I am ordering this plaid dress for mini.

Post-Scripts: Liberty London x Gucci.

+The new Liberty London x Gucci release is amazing. People are going wild over this bag in particular, but my heart is aflutter over these chain-embellished flats! I am sharing a full post in a few days featuring lots of Liberty London/Liberty London-inspired scores, but I shared a little preview of INSANELY CUTE Etsy finds featuring their iconic prints here. I mean, this personalized lavender sachet! Such a cute little gift at an unbelievable price!

+And, these darling Liberty London print sandals for little ones are currently marked down to $18. I bought these for mini for next summer — perfect accent to a simple white dress.

+Cute plaid top for $59.

+In case you waited — these Halloween jammies are now marked down to $10 and many sweet baby Halloween costumes are discounted to 60% off.

+Classic toggle coat for a little one.

+URGENT: I own these Alexandre Birman booties in a different colorway, but these in the chicest sage green are marked down 60% off!

+A less-expensive version of the J. Crew fleece everyone loved last week.

+Fun sweater on sale for under $50.

+Majorly lusting after this cardigan and a pair of Le Monde Beryl shoes (love these in inky velvet, these in unexpected corduroy, and these houndstooth ones. (Look for a little less with these in the rust velvet.)

+Dondolo has such amazing fall pieces out for children, with the most spectacular details. I love the idea of this rose bud bubble layered under a cable knit cardigan. And then this sweet pumpkin headband could be the simplest way to celebrate Halloween with a dress you already have in your daughter’s closet.

+CHIC houndstooth longline cardigan. Look for less with this steal from Mango.

+DEAD over this sweater for little ones.

+This Maje dress is on sale for $118 and SO chic with the horsebit print! Adorable with black tights and flats.

+What are you shopping for?

+On rooting yourself on and mirror pep talks.

We’ve talked about chic sweaters and transitional coats, but what about the perfect layering pieces for underneath? Below, some of my favorite finds for this fall:

RIBBED TURTLENECK (SIMILAR TO ONE SEEN ABOVE — LOOK FOR LESS WITH THIS)

EVERLANE WAFFLE TEES — A STAPLE FOR ME

TISSUE TURTLENECKS — I OWN THESE IN SO MANY COLORWAYS; LOOK FOR LESS WITH THIS! GREAT FOR LAYERING UNDER TURTLENECK SWEATERS OR A STATEMENT VEST

THERMAL TEE

LONG-SLEEVED TEE IN GREAT COLORS

SLIGHTLY HEAVIER-WEIGHT, BUT THIS RIBBED TURTLENECK WOULD LOOK AMAZING LAYERED UNDERNEATH A CHUNKY SWEATER LIKE THIS — LAYERED KNITS ARE ALL THE RAGE!

P.S. ICYMI: there is a really interesting exchange going on in the comments of this post about religion vs. spirituality.

P.P.S. Still not over all of these chain embellished finds…especially these shoes! Good Lord — my shoe wishlist is at an all-time high right now.

P.P.P.S. Mom guilt diaries.

What’s in your tsundoku pile this fall? I made pretty good headway through my summer reading list, reading six of the eight titles with a handful of others added in on top, and my favorite from an enjoyment standpoint was Curtis Sittenfeld’s Rodham, which I could not put down (full review here), though I think that Isabel Wilkerson’s The Warmth of Other Suns may be one of the most significant books I’ve read in years (full review here).

I will be sharing a proper book review post soon, as I’ve made my way through several books in the last few weeks that I am dying to talk about, but for now, wanted to share what’s on my radar for fall 2020 reading:

FOR A DARK THRILL RIDE // The Guest List by Lucy Foley and/or The End of Her by Shari La Pena. I just finished listening to The Guest List on audiobook, and it’s narrated by a delightful British cast. I was captivated by the twisty-turn-y, Agatha-Christie-esque plotline, which centers around a wedding on a remote island off the coast of Ireland. We meet a cast of characters with seriously dark backgrounds and someone turns up dead on the night of the wedding amidst an intense gale and intermittent power outages. Buckle up! On the latter: my mother and I are both fans of Shari La Pena’s work, and she has reported that she cannot put The End of Her down — it’s classic La Pena, meaning marital drama and relationship questions that need answering. In this case, a new mother is faced with the claim that her husband murdered his ex-wife! Perfect creepy October book.

FOR ARTFULLY WRITTEN FAMILY DRAMA // Shuggie Bain by Douglas Stuart. This is the highly-acclaimed debut novel of Douglas Stuart (nominated for The Booker Prize), and through it, we experience life as a boy from a working class family living in run-down public housing in 1980s Glasgow, Scotland. The novel centers around his relationship with his mother and her battle with addiction.

FOR EASY-TO-READ HISTORICAL FICTION // The Lions of Fifth Avenue by Fiona Davis. Several of you Magpies reached out to let me know how much you enjoyed this fictional account of a series of book thefts from the New York Public Library and the two generations of women who become embroiled in the fallout.

FOR DICKENSIAN ACTION // The Fingersmith by Sarah Waters. This book is actually almost twenty years old, but my well-read sister recently devoured this book and could not stop talking about it. Waters tells the story of a con man who attempts to inveigle an orphan into tricking a wealthy gentlewoman out of her vast inheritance.

FOR SOUL-SEARCHING // Queenie by Candice Carty-Williams. Described as “Bridget Jones’s Diary meets Americanah,” this novel presents Queenie Jenkins, twenty-five-year-old Jamaican British woman living in London, “straddling two cultures and slotting neatly into neither” as she seeks meaning in her work and relationships.

FOR CELEBRITY MEMOIR // The Meaning of Mariah Carey by Mariah Carey. You know the celebrity memoir is one of my favorite sub-genres, and Mariah Carey is one of my all-time favorite vocalists. (I don’t think any girl raised in the 90s would say otherwise.) Pessimism isn’t my style, but I’m not optimistic about the merits of this book — and still I can’t resist the pull.

What’s on your reading list this fall? What’s good?

A couple of reading-related finds worth consideration:

MY SISTER AND BROTHER-IN-LAW RAVE ABOUT THIS WEIGHTED BLANKET — MY SISTER SAID SITTING UNDER IT IS LIKE BEING IN A PERMANENT STATE OF SHAVASANA

ORGANIC COTTON WAFFLE TEES

COZY KNIT DUSTER SWEATER LIKE THIS OR THIS

CASHMERE JOGGERS

STILL NOT OVER THESE SHEARLING MULES (IF YOU’RE A BIRKS GAL, THESE TAMARA MELLON SANDALS ARE HAVING A MOMENT)

THE BEST PEPPERMINT TEA IN ALL THE LAND

A WINTER MUG

ALL THE SWEATSHIRTS

ALL THE FLEECE AND SHERPA

PEOPLE GO CRAZY OVER THIS HEATED MATTRESS PAD, WHICH SOUNDS LIKE HEAVEN

FALL HOME FINDS

P.S. Drive gently, dearie.

P.P.S. I am a pragmatic cook. How about you?

P.P.P.S. Why museums matter.

*Image above via At Home in Arkansas, a reminder that Christmas need not always been red and green! I love the way they’ve arranged greenery and pine cones into ginger jars on a traditional polished wood buffet table, and of course I always love a good boxwood wreath, here so cleverly tied to a chic mirror (my favorite picks for mirrors here) with an enormous and easy to DIY bow (I might use a burlap ribbon). And that vintage silver set! Swoon! Invest in your own here. If that’s not in the cards, consider this silver plated brass set atop this butler tray for a similar effect.

I was reassured when many of you told me I was not too early to be sharing Sugar Paper’s holiday gift wrap collaboration with Target, because come the first hint of frost in the air, and I am ready to listen to Christmas music and map out gifts for everyone on my list. I will try not to get too far ahead of myself here (the week leading up to Thanksgiving feels like the appropriate launch into holiday season) but then again — we are living in 2020, and I think we have all earned the right to go overboard with the (sparse few) celebrations we have on hand this year. Further, there are already a couple of amazing seasonal scores that are worth checking out before they sell out or so that they arrive on time…

+I have wanted to set up a little “village” on our sideboard for several years now. My mother-in-law has a few of these that she arranges on her mantel and I have loved them for years. I was ecstatic when Target released a highly affordable, darling set of white-painted metal houses. I bought the entire set, including (my favorite) the barn, this modern house, this Victorian, this petite home, and this chimney house. I can’t wait to arrange them around a garland — possibly this canvas one, currently in my basket for Thanksgiving. These houses are sure to go quick!

+Stocking holders can be hard to come by for some strange reason. We have a set of adorable reindeer similar to these (look for less with these), but since our family has expanded, we are in need of an extra hook or two. I’m torn between mixing in some additional reindeers, or revamping the entire look — I am in love with this nutcracker style and this white house set, too. My mother-in-law always decorates part of her living room with enormous white metal letters that spell JOY so I was also taken by these.

+We have Pottery Barn’s quilted velvet stockings (we have the ivory with red script personalization) and I love them because PB carries them every year, so it has been easy to add new stockings as we add new members to our family or if we need replacements for any reason. They are also machine-washable (has in fact come in handy with grubby little fingers!) and roomy enough to tuck big presents into. (Mr. Magpie always goes crazy on my stocking — sometimes the “big” gifts are in there!). I also love that they coordinate with our personalized tree skirt! That said, I have to be honest and say that the quality of Pottery Barn’s personalization has gone way down hill in the last few years. I’ve had to have multiple items sent back and re-stitched, and have heard the same from several of you. Hoping they work out their quality control issues, but just a heads up.

+If the PB stockings aren’t your style, a few other options: first, thank you to the reader who shared the gorgeous personalized needlepoint stockings from Bauble Stockings! These are stunning, and you have to read the story behind the business. The stockings are stitched by artisans who are also single mothers in Haiti, and a percentage of proceeds go to a children’s shelter in Atlanta. I am in love with this business and its big-hearted founder. Note that these stockings are small in size (read the background to find out why). For another full-size option, I love this cable knit (personalizable) style or this similar one (without the personalization).

+Hanna Andersson just released their holiday jammies! These always go quickly. I am eagerly awaiting the launch of TBBC’s Christmas night-night collection — some of my absolute favorite Christmas pajamas have come from here. I think I’ll be getting these for mini and these for micro. And this nightgown from Petite Plume is already in my cart!

+I love greenery in the home for the holidays, and these rosemary trees in their sweet woven pots would be adorable tied up with an enormous velvet or grosgrain bow. I also bought several of these mini boxwood wreaths to hang in our windows last year, tied up by black and white striped gosgrain ribbon. It looked so festive and handsome! And, finally, I love a pair of mini moss Christmas trees like these I found years ago that I usually arrange in the center of my dining room table, surrounded by mercury glass votives and pillar candlesticks. So chic.

+Related: in love with these simple wreath place cards, and I have just added these elegant garland/branch ones to my cart for my Thanksgiving table!

+The first of many festive holiday wear finds…I had to have this sweater with the adorable bow buttons!

+If you are celebrating the Christian tradition of Christmas, good to get your Advent calendar and nativity set ordered sooner than later so they come in time. We have a precious peg doll nativity set that mini has absolutely loved to play with every year that is similar to this (love that the shop owner will customize per your request). I also love this elegant wooden set and this simple white set. Maybe one day I will start collecting the Lladro porcelain nativity set, which my mom has slowly acquired over the course of her life — it is stunning! Note that you can often find pieces of the Lladro creche for a great price on Etsy, like this king!

+For an Advent calendar, this one is currently in my cart, as we give mini a small present every day of Advent (sometimes just a few crayons or a pack of raisins, other times a Christmas book or little toy) and I like the size of the pockets on this one! This wooden one with drawers is also cute, but probably too small for us.

+I shared this earlier this week, but this personalized baby’s first Christmas ornament is absolutely gorgeous. The classiest ornament I’ve ever seen along these lines!

+Swedish dala horses are a seasonal classic for Scandinavians, and this one or a few of these wooden ones are chic on a mantel.

+Mr. Magpie and I buy a new ornament for everyone in the family every year (may eventually shift to just buying one for the entire family as we are quickly stocking up), but this is a recent favorite I bought for my bivalve-loving husband last year. This year, I am eyeing this caviar tin for him and this set of handmade felted Nutcracker characters. Beyond!

+I write about this every year, but this tree stand changed our lives for the better. Those rinky-dinky plastic ones with the metal screws that they sell everywhere are IMPOSSIBLE. We always got netting stuck in them, the tree was never straight, and it was just a total pain to maneuver. (Also, I was always skeptical they could support the weight of the 12 foot trees Mr. Magpie insists upon…). These are a CINCH to use, super sturdy, and has circumvented many marital squabbles over getting the tree in the stand.

+So many of you bought the mini pumpkin-shaped waffle iron I bought for my children and have mesmerized/delighted their own broods with it. (I already used it for a special Halloween-themed breakfast-for-dinner for mini, and she went wild.). I noticed that the brand also has a snowflake shaped waffle iron available for the holidays ($10). Conveniently cute for fans of the Disney Frozen franchise.

+I love Nest’s classic holiday candle, and am eyeing their orange and clove one as an alternative.

+Mini absolutely loves this classic Christmas book (great illustrations) and we read this one year-round.

Just writing this post has left me giddy with excitement. Let me know if you’re looking for anything else in particular heading into the holidays!

P.S. If you’re not yet ready to lean into the holidays, Halloween is just around the corner, and you still have time to snag some gear to make it extra special for your little ones.

P.P.S. I often need to re-read this post to remind myself to “think of the howling wolves.”

P.P.P.S. Also: affirmations.

While the children nap, I curl up in bed to read, write…or buy things on Amazon…

CUTEST GINGHAM PAPER PLATES

THESE SLIPPERS LOOK LIKE HEAVEN

FALL PUZZLE — THIS BRAND IS INCREDIBLE

THESE VINTAGE FLOURSACK KITCHEN TOWELS GET RAVE REVIEWS AND COME IN THE MOST FUN PRINTS; I LOVE THE BERRY PATCH ONES!

CABLEKNIT TIGHTS FOR LITTLE ONES IN PERFECT COLORS

I ALWAYS KEEP A FEW OF THESE ON HAND TO STASH IN MY PURSE FOR EMERGENCIES WITH MINI — INEXPENSIVE AND KEEP HER ENTERTAINED

HAD TO BUY THESE BUNNY SLIPPERS FOR MINI

THE BEST SPICE JARS — A FEW YEARS AGO, I STARTED DECANTING ALL OF OUR SPICES INTO THESE FROM BAGGIES (WE USUALLY BUY SPICES IN BULK FROM KALUSTUYAN’S HERE IN NY OR SPICE HOUSE IN CHICAGO, SO THEY COME IN BAGGIES); I LABEL THE TOPS WITH MY LABELMAKER AND THEN ORGANIZE THEM INTO THESE BINS, WHICH ARE MARKED A-M, N-Z

GOOD CLOTHING/BEDDING STORAGE SOLUTION FOR OUT-OF-SEASON (REVIEWS ARE STRONG)

THIS WHITE FAUX FUR STOOL IS PERFECT FOR A TEEN’S ROOM

GORGEOUS CASPARI NAPKINS

$23 PUFFER FOR LITTLE ONES

LAST YEAR, THESE WELL REVIEWED AND AFFORDABLE CHILDREN’S THERMALS SOLD OUT IN A FLASH – ALREADY ORDERED MINI THE FLORAL SET FOR LAYERING UNDER SNOWSUIT

HAD NEVER HEARD OF GLUE DOTS BEFORE (!) — BOUGHT THESE AND SOME HALLOWEEN THEMED POMS/GOOGLY EYES FOR MINI’S CLASS TO DECORATE TINY PUMPKINS!

THANKS TO A MAGPIE READER, USING THESE STURDY POUCHES FOR EVERYTHING THESE DAYS, FROM STOWING MINI’S FACE SHIELD IN HER BACKPACK TO ORGANIZING GAMES/TOYS WITH LOTS OF LITTLE PARTS

SNUGGLIEST $30 FLEECE

P.S. In a similar vein: affordable little girls finds for under $30 and affordable little boy finds for (mostly) under $22.

P.P.S. Easily my favorite recent bargain fashion snags: this $59 houndstooth skirt, which I’ll pair with Gucci tights and a black turtleneck sweater, and this $35 padded headband. Eee!!! Fall!

P.P.P.S. ICYMI: I wrote fiction!

I sometimes wonder at how much of what I experience is inborn and unmitigated, and how much is metered by the observed predilections of the people I love. Is that what it means to be human, our idiosyncrasies jangling against our inheritances? Do some of us hang truer to ourselves and others look out on the world from the covert of our parents’ tastes and interests? For my part, no small measure of the happinesses I find in life entails the anticipation of the pleased reactions of my parents. Provincial and immature as that may sound, my stake in their joy does not necessarily represent inferior footing. There is something profound in imagining my own wonderment at the stars seen from the backyard of the home we rented in Quogue earlier this year — unobscured by the smog of this-city-that-still-moves — bearing a direct and invisible line to that of my father, and his father, and his father, who might have looked upon the same net of stars from Frosolone, Italy one night one hundred and fifty years ago with the same posture of quiet veneration that I saw on my father’s face when we would hike up to Weller Lake or Grizzly Reservoir outside of Aspen, Colorado and pitch a tent all of those summers of my youth. Did I intuitively know to awe at this majesty or was it my father’s reverent silence, standing with his hands on his hips, looking up, the mirror of the lake reflecting the incandescence of the celestial in his face?

I am now too a parent, hyper-aware of the fact that little rabbits have big ears. An errant dismissal or a vigorous enthusiasm shapes the outlook of my vigilant children. When my daughter opens a gift, I hear an echo of my own voice and intonation: “oh my gooodnessss!” The same drop in emphasis on the “my,” the same drag on the “neeesss.” It is a carbon copy of my own girlish glee at opening gifts — my own self living in her — and I know that I must have pre-dispositioned her in this way. It is strange to think of the share of her that is mine and the share of her that is her own: the small but mighty soul born intact three and a half years ago that morning in Chicago that felt more spacewalk than earthbound, my emotions surging beyond their holsters, the entire day uncircumscribed, outside, too much, as though the force of her landing there in my arms had displaced everything.

So maybe there is give and take between the generations. Maybe I afford her my glee in small gifts and pumpkin-shaped waffles and bats on the windows for Halloween and the harbinger-like appearance of a cardinal on a branch of a tree in Central Park just off the Jackie O. Reservoir — and maybe she extends back the generosity of her little voice calling down the corridor as she skitters out the door for school: “goodbye mama, goodbye Hill, goodbye Tilly, goodbye apartment,” as though our home is a member of our family, a living space to be acknowledged and celebrated, which, of course, upon reflection, it is. Will I ever think of this apartment without remembering the 21 days I spent isolated in it during this unbearable pandemic? How it saved us, became our cocoon? How it felt to walk back and forth in my son’s tiny nursery when he was still small enough to be rocked to sleep in those final days of caring for a newborn? How I know that when I am old and gray I will still remember him burrowing into my arms, happy and warm, as I rested my back against the slats of his crib at the ungodly hour of three or four in the morning?

This exchange, then, is the stuff of family, the warming of hands around the same fires that comforted generations past, and the refraction of light back. I have always wondered about what is either diffused or passed on from one generation to the next, but it seems that the flow is not one-directional after all. I find reverberations of my daughter in the way I now ferret out families in the most animate of objects — say, a cluster of acorns, with two small and two large. “That’s mama, dada, Hill, and Emory,” she’d say, and so she has returned to me something from my youth: the symmetry of life, the reduction of all things into what is legible through the prism of her parochial world. And maybe me standing under the canopy of stars in Quogue earlier this summer and finding myself immediately transported to the edge of Weller Lake, the sky similarly uncottoned from the city smog to which I had grown accustomed as a child, was not only a mirror of my father’s awe and my imitation of it at the impressionable age of seven, but a shadow of the way my great-grandfather might have leaned back, his hands on his hips, on some midnight Molisano excursion, the Apennines not so far from the Rockies after all.

Post-Scripts.

+Those summers in Colorado were highly-instructive — I learned a lot about faith, and right and wrong, and how to write there.

+More memories of my generations past.

+I feel like Vans are not my usual aesthetic, but I had to buy micro these adorable fire engine red sneakers and I am dying over these glittery hi-tops for mini.

+Related: a few of you asked after the sneakers mini was wearing in a few Instastory photos from our trip to Fishkill Farms to go apple picking last weekend — they are these Vejas! I had to indulge my downtown girl with some cool kicks for school.

+Currently lusting after one of these Emerson Fry blouses — sort of like the fall equivalent of the blockprint dresses we all wore all summer.

+Minnow just released a knitwear collection — love this sweet crewneck sweater in the perfect shade of blue.

+Speaking of the perfect blue, eyeing this “blanket scarf” in the chic blue colorway — would look great against camel, gray, or ivory.

+Fun fall dress.

+A great everyday turtleneck dress to pair with flats or chic boots.

+Dreaming of a pair of these cozy ribbed leggings.

+Who has tried these Dudley Stevens fleece turtlenecks? I feel like I’ve seen so many ads for them but don’t know anyone who has worn them IRL.

+This puffer is crazy chic. This puffer style is also super fun (and like 1/10th the price).

+And I love this puffer for expecting mamas! More chic maternity finds here.

+An aubade to parenting.

+This Target find! Such a chic piece — the shape and pulls resemble something from Bungalow5.

+A really good pearl-embellished cardigan for $60.

Q: Looking for an amazing cream turtleneck sweater for the winter.

A: I love this Everlane cashmere style, this chunky cableknit, and this elegant one from Brooks Brothers.

Related: chic statement sweaters for fall here!

Q: Best (preferably midi) sweater dress for an outdoor drive-by baby shower (mine!)

A: Congratulations! This one is super fun with the bow in the back (and on sale, and cashmere!). Caveat emptor: I found Hatch ran really big. This turtleneck style is very on-trend with the exaggerated sleeves, maybe paired with a fun fall headband. And this one in the black would be sleek with some trendy flats. If you’re earlier in your pregnancy (slash this *could* work with a serious bump — can’t tell from the pictures), I am obsessed with this non-maternity sweater dress. Currently in my cart!

Q: I’m planning to move to DC from Seattle by Christmas. Any planning tips, especially in light of COVID19?

A: Wow! Good luck — I know how stressful a move can be, and then throw in COVID-19 and the fact that it’s cross-country and just know that you need to be kind to yourself. These were the things that helped us tremendously in all of our moves:

+Craft a long checklist in an excel document or digital list tool like Wunderlist or even the Reminders app in your iPhone of every last thing that crosses your mind that you need to do. Everything from registering your car to cashing in public transit fare cards to selling the couch you know you won’t be bringing with you. Add to this list as things cross your mind. For me, having a central, organized place to keep everything made me feel more in control and like I was less likely to let something slip through the cracks. Then assign each item a due date and an urgency level (high, medium, low). Organize by due date and make sure to tackle the most urgent items at the top of the list first.

+If you can swing it, pay for professional packers. This has totally saved my sanity the last three moves.

+Whether you use professional packers or not, you will need to organize, declutter, and pack certain items yourself. Start this early — even a month before the move date — because sometimes things take a lot more time than you think. With each move, I have found myself waylaid by all the organization/extra steps that come with sifting through items to donate, trash, and sell. It all takes time and coordination! Probably a good idea to tackle dense closets earliest.

+My dad has always been on me to change my license/ID as soon as I get to a new state, and transfer car tags, etc. He’s always been right. You can run into weird issues if you don’t do this ASAP.

+Pack a capsule wardrobe that can span two weeks and “living essentials” bag (i.e., cosmetics, hair care, brush, medicines, chargers, laptop, laundry detergent, dish soap and a sponge, plastic cups) for yourself and keep that isolated in a suitcase for yourself about a week prior to moving. That way, you can pack freely without having to worry about fishing things out.

+Keep a DO NOT PACK space somewhere in your apartment with a few rolls of paper towels, cleaning spray, sharpies, sponges, hand soap, masking tape, trash bags (!!!), and a wine key (ha). These are things you always need and that are easy to throw into boxes before you realize you still need them.

+GOOD LUCK!!!

Q: Which do you value more, religion or spirituality?

A: I had to sit with this question for a long time. I felt instinctually as though I should say that I value spirituality more, as preferring “religion” might suggest that I am more interested in the rules and apparatus than I am its core teachings. But, upon reflection, the truth is that I don’t know if I can disambiguate between the two, as they are so deeply connected to one another for me. I was raised by devout Catholic parents, attended Catholic school until college, and frankly fell in love with the rituals and culture of the Catholic Church as a child. My spiritual life has developed within that framework — has been borne of it — and so I can’t imagine one without the other, or assign a value to either. I’m deeply curious about the provenance of this question, and what other Magpies would have to say about this topic.

Q: Any brother/sister Halloween costume ideas?

A: We are doing a family homage to The Little Mermaid. Mini begged to be Ariel so we got her a standard dress-up set (complete with red wig — it’s hilarious on her), micro is Sebastian (<<technically a lobster costume but looks like a crab), Mr. Magpie is King Triton (trident, wig, and crown), and I am a very lazy Ursula. (She assigned us our characters).

The fact that she was so adamant about being Ariel made it pretty easy. If your kids are not particularly jazzed on anything in particular, I’m dying over this baby Eeyore costume (they have all the Pooh characters for ages under 24M) and this for a toddler Piglet.

Basically, all the Disney movies present adorable brother/sister costume ideas!

Q: Any gift ideas for a 1.5 year old girl?

A: Yes! I did a round up of great gifts for toddlers here and recently a round-up of “slow-burn toys” for little children. Speaking specifically to this age, mini loved her mini Carolle doll, Little People house and toys, and play food, especially her tea set, at 1.5.

Q: I’m looking for casual clothes that also make me look put together. I’m a mom of two!

A: I hear you, mama! For fall, I would recommend buying a pair of jeans that makes you feel good about yourself first and foremost. J. Brand is still running this 40% off promotion, and I alternate between a few pairs of J. Brands and J. Crew toothpick jeans, which fit me like a dream and are almost always on sale. Add a pair of great everyday shoes that allow for movement and are comfortable — I have been living in my Gucci mules, my GG sneakers, and my VB loafers — and then buy some inexpensive on-trend tops and accessories. In short, my formula is this: invest in pieces that do the hard work (jeans and shoes that you’ll wear constantly!) and scrimp on the trendier pieces that you won’t wear for dozens of seasons but that make you feel “together” and “relevant” now. A few trendy scores I particularly like today:

THIS CROCHET-COLLAR SWEATER

THIS ADORABLE MINI SKIRT

A TRENDY OVERSHIRT

A CHIC SWEATSHIRT

A PADDED HEADBAND

RUFFLE COLLAR POPLIN SHIRT

Q: Any suggestions for games to play with family for Thanksgiving?

A: So fun! Love that you’re thinking ahead like this. I just ordered this to play with my sister and brother-in-law for the occasion, but if children will be around, Apples to Apples and Scattergories are always big hits in our family.

Q: Do you have recommendations for baby’s first Christmas ornament? Thanks so much!

A: Ooh, yes! I’m in love with these hand-stitched linen ones. Beyond beautiful.

Separately, another holiday item for children worth planning ahead for: an advent calendar. We gift mini little treats every day of Advent and I think I might upgrade to this one this year.

Finally, this custom home portrait ornament is such a stunning gift for a new home-owner!

Q: I’m looking for toddler winter gloves, hats, and scarves!

A: For gloves, I can’t recommend this inexpensive 3-pack more. Good colors and they will get lost, so it’s nice that they’re not super-precious. (Plus, I already like having multiples — I already stowed one set in her backpack.)

For hats, I am in love with the ones from Blueberry Hill. I bought one for mini last year similar to this and she received so many compliments. They are well-priced but look almost hand-knitted by a grandmother. This solid cream one is probably the most practical as it will go with anything, but I love this fair-isle style, too.

I also was absolutely swooning over this personalized hat a friend of mine gave micro when he was born — it was so beyond precious on him. These TBBC ones are also super cute.

Q: When on a budget for clothes, shoes, etc., how do you choose where to invest and where not to?

A: My personal philosophy is to invest in good shoes. You wear them every single day, they probably take more of a beating than any other article of clothing you own (and therefore quality or the lack thereof shows quickly), and they can make a $20 cotton dress look amazing. “Good shoes” does not have to mean “non-trendy,” either. I have Valentino Rockstuds, Gucci Princetowns, and Aquazzura Christy lace-ups that I anticipated would fade out of favor but I still wear every single season and I still feel great about. These are shoes that look amazing after infinite uses because they are great quality and built to last! If I were preparing to invest in one pair of shoes, I would recommend a pair of Chanel ballet flats. These have never, ever, ever gone out of style and they go with everything from dresses to jeans to even shorts! You’ll feel like a million bucks in them.

The other area I would invest in is really good denim that makes you feel great — at least, if you’re like me, and wear denim most days of autumn and winter.

Then you can pair with inexpensive sweaters, exaggerated collar tops, and the like. My approach is generally to save on the upper half of my body (tops, accessories) and to invest in the bottom half (jeans, shoes).

Q: Best children’s books about Jesus or The Bible for a three year old?

A: I had to call in the expert for this one, who recommended this children’s Bible. (Elizabeth is also a very devout Catholic and I routinely turn to her for advice on raising my children in the faith.). She did warn that the questions at the end of every story are heavy-handed and repetitive, but added that her son (just turned 5) absolutely loves the Bible and those questions. I just ordered it for mini, realizing I did not have a children’s Bible for her!

The religious books that mini has loved for a long time are this lift-the-flap Noah’s Ark book, this Christmas book (which we read all year round — she’s loved this since she was one year old!), and this prayer book.

Q: What would you use for bathroom shelves or bathroom storage for a cramped space?

A: I so feel you on this. We had to get really crafty with using every spare inch of our bathroom in our first apartment here in NY in particular. A couple thoughts…

+This narrow storage cabinet has clean, simple, unobtrusive lines for stowing beauty products, toilet paper, towels, etc.

+This is a clever pair of free-floating shelves, one of which has a hand towel rack — could be perfect for above a toilet or next to a sink.

+Decorative risers/tiers are a clever way for maximizing storage on a sink or in a sill even. I like this one and this one for things like perfume, hand wash, soaps, etc.

+I don’t love over-the-toilet furniture because I feel like they tend to make the space feel more cluttered and clunky, but sometimes you don’t really have a choice in the matter if you’re super tight on space. This one and this one are chic options.

+This caddy is an attractive way to make the most of a narrow space — use it horizontally!

+A storage cart like this or this (note the built-in pocket for hot tools!) could be the ticket — I like that they aren’t as chunky/bulky as a lot of furniture solutions might be, and the open shelving makes things easy to access (and blocks out less space in the room).

+This OXO shower caddy is SO thoughtfully designed. Randomly one of my favorite home purchases, with hooks for a loofah and a bed for your razor and the perfect height for most shampoos/conditioners. It also stores A LOT.

+A free-standing towel rack could be one way to get overflow towels out of a cabinet to free up more space for products.

P.S. More Magpie Mail.

P.P.S. Target home finds.

P.P.P.S. What are you secretly good at?

Oh man do I love a good houndstooth piece and, lucky for me, this textile pattern is majorly in this season. Below, my favorite houndstooth pieces…

ULTRA-COOL IRO SHACKET

SO MANY DARLING WOOL HOUNDSTOOTH MINIS OUT — LOVE THIS VB (ON SALE FOR $113), THIS SANDRO (ALSO ON SALE), AND THIS $69 SCORE

NINA RICCI TURTLENECK (DROOL) — LOOK FOR LESS WITH THIS H&M SCORE

THIS GORGEOUS TOTE

HOUNDSTOOTH FACE MASK

HOW FUN ARE THESE MULES?! OR — UPGRADE FOOTWEAR PICK — THESE DIOR SLINGBACKS?!

THIS $28 PLAID TARGET STEAL IS NOT TECHNICALLY HOUNDSTOOTH, BUT LOOKS LIKE IT’S IN THE SAME FAMILY — ADORABLE

THIS TWEED JACKET AND ITS ADORABLE MATCHING SKIRT — WONDERING IF I CAN PULL OFF THE MATCHY-MATCHY OR AM BETTER OF WITH JUST ONE OR THE OTHER

THIS FUN PUFFER VEST

THIS KNOTTED LELE HEADBAND (LOOK FOR LESS WITH THIS) OR THIS PADDED EUGENIA KIM ONE

THIS AMAZING SHIFT

A CHIC $13 UPDATE TO YOUR WINTER COAT

UNREAL GUCCI MAGIC

SMITTEN WITH THIS DRAMATIC MONCLER PUFFER (LOOK FOR LESS WITH THIS)

If you have an itty bitty baby, how sweet (and on-trend) is this houndstooth baby k’tan and this coverall?!

For little girls, I am ordering mini this houndstooth dress (we own this dress in other prints and it is the perfect everyday dress — soft pima cotton, easy to wash, and I love the collar), and I am eyeing these adorable hairbows for pigtails!

For men, I’m lobbying hard for Mr. Magpie to wear these to Thanksgiving dinner.

Finally, for home, this $24 houndstooth bath mat is SO CRAZY CHIC. I’m obsessed with it. And do you not adore this inexpensive houndstooth pillow?!

P.S. A woman with serious backbone.

P.P.S. What’s your bedtime routine?

P.P.P.S. My everyday skincare and makeup regimen.

I took a couple of psychology courses at UVA and the only things I remember are Phineas Gage (the vision of the iron rod through his head haunted me for years) and Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi’s concept of “flow,” a notion that materializes in my waking thoughts at least a couple of times a year. Do you know about “flow”? The basic idea, as posited by Csikszentmihalyi, is that people are happiest when they are in a state of “flow”—of deep concentration and complete absorption in an activity. In those moments, your skill level matches the challenge at hand, and nothing else seems to matter.

When I started running every other day earlier this year, I was hellbent on reprising the experience of “runner’s flow” (others have called this “runner’s high”), remembering the rush I used to feel when I was strong enough to regularly run four or five miles at the drop of a hat. It was usually around mile two that I’d click into that flow mode and it would just feel good to be running, like my feet were moving me forward with minimal effort, and everything was loose and easy. You know how vocalists talk about singing “in the pocket”? As in, they’ve hit a smooth spot and are nailing the notes without strain? That’s kind of what it feels like when I hit the “flow” point in running.

Getting back into a groove with exercise was highly physically demanding this time around. I was in the right headspace, doubled down in my own determination, but my body was reluctant to catch up, and I was sore and exhausted for days. I’m not sure whether it is my age or the fact that I have been through the wringer with ailments this year (the flu, a nasty stomach bug, and COVID19) or the fact that my body is still strained from the third opening of my c-section incision just over a year ago or simply the fact that I had done so little by way of formal exercise for so long. It took me almost a full month of running every other day to start to feel my own strength, to power up an incline without wanting to slow down or give up, and to end my jog in a state of endorphin-induced glee. And it took even longer — six weeks? eight? — to experience my first moment of flow while running around the Jackie O. Reservoir in Central Park. I felt a surge come over me, and I looked across the shimmering surface of the reservoir, and I felt victorious.

As I completed my circuit, I had the strong sense that I would never forget that moment, and now, a week or two out from the occasion, when I mention running on this blog or in passing conversation, I find my thoughts circling around the exact spot on the bridleway where I reclaimed my flow. And when I pass that site, as I did this morning, I am aware, too, that a small stretch of gravelly path in New York City has become a landmark in the geography of my adult life, a monument to my recovery from the birth of two perfect babies and one horrific virus.

Written with deep gratitude–for my body, for this city, for the gift of flow.

Post-Scripts: New Athletics + Athleisure Finds.

I’ve shared some of these across recent posts, but a few new favorite athletics/athleisure finds (many of which I have purchased myself) all in one place:

SCALLOP-EDGED SPORTS BRA ($7.70 IN MY SIZE IN BLACK!)

THIS $31 SET — INCLUDES BOTH LEGGINGS AND SPORTS BRA! — DISCOVERED VIA LE CATCH…ORDERED IN GRAY

LOOSE-FIT RUNNING TOPS (MY PREFERENCE): LOVE BOTH OUTDOOR VOICES AND LULULEMON (AND JUST ORDERED THIS $24 STYLE, WHICH IS SUPER SIMILAR TO THE LATTER)

STILL A FEW COLORS/SIZES LEFT IN THIS AMAZING $12 RUNNING TANK — RUNS SLIGHTLY LARGE AND HAS A FANTASTIC, SOFT MATERIAL

WAFFLE TEE-SHIRT HOODIE — DREAM OF LAYERING THIS UNDER AN EXTRA LAYER OF KNITWEAR, LIKE THIS OR THIS

CASHMERE SOCKS AND/OR SLIPPERS (DROOL)

ALL THE SWEATSHIRTS

CASHMERE JOGGERS OR RIBBED JOGGERS FROM LETT

$22 MEMORY FOAM SLIPPERS — READ THE REVIEWS!!!

STRAPPY SPORTS BRA FOR UNDER $20 — LIKE IT IN THE SEAFOAM GREEN COLOR

WAFFLE KNIT LEGGINGS AND HOODIE

LIGHTWEIGHT LOUNGE CARDIGAN

STILL IN A COMMITTED RELATIONSHIP WITH MY RECLINER SLEEP PANTS

P.S. On the topic of classes at UVA: notes from a fantastic class I took there.

P.P.S. On years that ask and years that answer. (Guessing that 2020 is a big fat question mark for most of us.)

P.P.P.S. Cozy sherpa and fleece for fall. Are we all twinning in this jacket this fall?! (And these clogs?)

Photo above of street style starlet Therese Hellstrom. She is wearing a sweater from last-season Custommade but you can get the vibe for less with this ASOS steal or this apricot-colored cardigan from H&M.

Amidst the sea of black, sherpa-neutral, and olive greens I have been serving up, let me share a few fun pastel finds for fall:

THIS ADORABLE SANDRO SKIRT (ON SUPER SALE FOR $118)

THIS TO-DIE-FOR LADYLIKE CARDIGAN FROM MAJE — OR THIS SIMILAR SANDRO (40% OFF)

THIS FLASHY LSF STATEMENT PIECE

THIS WOOL MINI IN THE BEIGE COLORWAY

THESE PERFECT SKY BLUE BALLET FLATS

THIS FLOATY CREPE DE CHINE

THIS HEAVILY DISCOUNTED BROCK COLLECTION BLOUSE

THIS TWEED SHIFT

THIS $30 THERMAL TEE IN BALLET PINK

THIS PINK VELVET LELE HEADBAND — ON SALE!!!

THIS DRAMATIC ZARA CARDI

THIS CROCHET COLLAR SWEATER FROM TOPSHOP

P.S. More for lounging/bedtime, but this ultra-soft cardigan in the pastel pink has my heart eyes.

P.P.S. Still some great scores at Mango for 30% off.