By: Jen Shoop

I took a morning off one of the days leading up to Christmas and, partly influenced by Omicron, resolved to do nothing at all. Normally, my “mornings off” wrap around self-care visits like manicures, salon days, lunches with friends, errands that feel vaguely therapeutic because I am alone and any alone time when not writing is rare. This time, I decided I wanted to sit down on the couch and binge “Emily in Paris” at 10 A.M. Our nanny was home, as were my children, and it felt —

Weird.

Uncomfortable.

Whenever my children came running through the living room, I’d feel the need to pause the show and shuffle around tidying up, fluffing the pillows, putting toys away. This was in part owing to adult content but mainly owing to the sensation of awkwardness that I was sitting in my own house but decidedly not looking after my own children, and so I felt compelled to mask my loafing. When they descended for lunch, I jumped up and immediately got to work making sandwiches and pouring milk. I waited until after they’d gone their separate ways to resume my position of leisure. I can’t quite tell whether this was because I felt badly I was doing something so lazy in plain view of our hardworking nanny, or because it felt wrong not to be caring for my children when I was not working or out of the house running an errand. After all, we employ her so we can work. It felt like I was in some way breaking a rule by employing her while not working. And yet — ! Of course she is here many times when I am getting my nails done or having coffee with a girlfriend or grabbing a drink with my husband. Still, it felt delinquent on some base level.

At the same time, during the stretches I was alone, I felt the most relaxed I’ve felt in months. Maybe years? I was entirely by myself, doing something purely for my own pleasure, with no productivity upside. I was consciously and deliberately wasting a morning in frivolity, and I cannot recall the last time I indulged in such idle pleasure. I did not even let myself write Christmas cards or arrange for groceries or respond to emails. I just reclined on the couch under a thick blanket and watched and thought and lost myself in the confection that is that show. It felt deliciously illicit.

Later that night, I shared my mixed emotions with Mr. Magpie. We mused over why I felt so badly about it — after all, I am “allowed” to take mornings off. Why must they all be spent out of the house or cloistered in my bedroom? Why can’t I avail myself of the living room TV and just sit in leisure for a spell?

I think the discomfort stems in some part from the nature of my business. I work for myself, and my work is free-form, and my hours are flexible. Therefore, I have the strange and delightful option to, for example, run to the dry cleaner or stop by my mother’s for lunch or get my eyebrows done whenever I want to. I do not need to take PTO to arrange these outings. And so I never do actually “schedule time off,” unless we are traveling or have family visiting or it is a holiday when the children will be home and our nanny will not–but then those days are not free time to watch a TV show or read a book by myself.

I am not complaining. I feel fulfilled and energized and enjoy my downtime in the evenings, usually alongside Mr. Magpie. I would not trade the free-form nature of my work for anything. I don’t think it could function any other way–the impulse to write (for me at least) comes in fits and starts and cannot be time-boxed. And so it is productive — healthful! — for me to be able to zip off and complete a chore or errand when I need processing time. Sometimes my best writing happens while running to the cobbler or picking up groceries. Beyond that, on principle, I am loathe to call this blog “work” in any capacity because I enjoy it so much. It feels like creative output, not “labor” in the sense I have traditionally known it.

In short: it all works. But I think it does explain why taking a morning “off” at home felt so alien. It did not sync with the setup of my work/life balance, which is much more syncopated and less scheduled than I would suspect of many others. (…I could be, and probably am, wrong? I’m thinking now that I am certain COVID has put pressure on many more traditional job arrangements such that lines are thoroughly blurred in similarly complicated ways. I am thinking specifically of my girlfriend who is a high-powered attorney but who, since COVID has her working remotely, now picks up her son from school every day at noon during her “lunch break.” I know she loves the way her WFH arrangement accommodates this brief interlude with her son, but I also know it must make things complicated — i.e., meetings running late, deadlines, and the age-old challenge of clipping in and out of work/mom modes. (It is not automatic!))

But the other half of my discomfort equation, the half that I think most of you will relate to, is —

Why do I feel guilty doing nothing for a rare stretch of time at my own home when I am paying a caregiver to look after my children? One of my friends messaged me to say: “I’m glad you’re taking time to take care of yourself.” It was such a welcome grant of permission that I didn’t know I needed. I thought to myself: “I should not feel guilty about this! I am allowed to be lazy every now and then, and to carve out a way to accommodate that laziness.” And is it even fair to call it “laziness”? Why do I itch to categorize a morning of relaxation as lethargy? I know myself to be a busy, hard-working person. I can take breaks, and they needn’t always be breaks that tick something off a list somewhere. Thinking more deeply about it, I do on occasion take “breaks” of different kinds that feel more medicinal and do not trigger my mom guilt as heavily. For example, I would not feel the same guilt over going for a walk outside, reading on the porch, or even baking cookies — all pleasurable pastimes that involve a similar detachment from goals and to-dos but feel more wholesome in some sense. (Though, to be sure, I rarely do any of these things while our nanny is here.) Was it just the modality of TV that I was hung up on?

Now my thoughts are circling around my SAHM friends, who — like, when do they get to take a walk just sit on the couch and watch TV? Never? Imagining myself in their shoes, I think it would be difficult to hire a sitter so I could sit at home watching “Emily in Paris,” for reasons similar to those I mentioned above. At least with my current arrangement (i.e., a full-time nanny), I have the option at my disposal, setting aside my discomfort for a moment.

I guess what I’m getting at is —

Is this a mom guilt issue I need to just barrel through? Is it something about my underlying value judgment of TV as a frivolous pastime? Why was I so cagey about the entire thing?

What do you think? Have you experienced anything similar?

Post-Scripts.

+On mom guilt.

+On the lopsided, beautiful dance of motherhood.

+On remaining interesting to your partner after giving birth.

+A woman contains multitudes.

+On shifting gears after a long day.

+Some good winter reading picks.

+The blame game.

Shopping Break.

+We had six inches of snow yesterday! It reminded me of Chicago snow. I know I’ve written about this before, but Polarn O Pyret makes the best snow bibs for children. They are pricey, but they last an eternity, are unisex, and are very warm and insulated. They run huge, which has actually worked out nicely. Mini has worn the same pair for THREE YEARS (a size 2-3T, and she is now almost always a size 5 or even 6). The straps are adjustable so they really do grow with the child but the legs are cut really long (I guess for all those tall Scandi children), and because they are snow pants, you can just kind of bunch them up using the elastic at the ankle until they fit properly. Anyway, micro has worn the size 1.5-2 years last year and this one, and he is currently a size 3T in everything else, and they still fit fine. Next year, I’ll put him in mini’s current pair and buy mini a pair 4-6. These are simply the best.

+I have to say, though, these cheerfully printed snow overalls from Hannah Andersson also turned my head, and are less expensive. Love the punchy floral for a little lady!

+We have some snow gear at home but this latest dump led me to order this highly-rated snow saucer for future white mornings.

+This popular top was just re-stocked! A great birthday top IMO.

+These under-$20 mittens have a handmade look to them. Love! More chic cold weather accessories here.

+Speaking of mittens and handmade, I have long lusted after one of the spectacular knit pieces from Mr. Mittens, like this gorgeous pink cardigan. I noticed that Net-A-Porter just moved a bunch of the pieces from this label to clearance, and how amazing is this green number and this knit dress (I immediately imagined it for an expecting mama)?

+Just love this winter dress from SEA.

+Just bought mini these silver Hunter boots as she outgrew her last pair seemingly overnight and we actually have had a ton of rainy days since moving here. Micro also absolutely lives in his pair, come rain or shine, and was also at the outer limits of wearing his pair in comfort, so bought him these in the military red.

+Similarly, mini outgrew her Uggs also overnight (we have had this issue since she was born — she seems to change sizes mid-season, which drives me mad!!! two sets of everything per season?!), and we get a lot of use out of those. They’re so easy to put on and nice and warm, too. I have bought her the Bailey style with the bows in the past but this time I got her these simple ones in the mauve/lavender color because they are under $80, go with her wardrobe, and will tide us over until she needs a new pair next fall.

+Still in love with this epic statement top.

+J’adore a pin-stripe button-down. While you’re there: cashmere, for under $100!

+Love the silhouette of this fitness jacket.

+This sheep storage basket for a nursery…!

+CUTE collared sweatshirt.

+Obsessed with the fit of these jeans.

+Sherpa sneaks!

+Chic layering necklace. (Heart ones here, if you’re in the market.)

+Love the inexpensive socks from this brand for my children. They have a nice weight to them — not too thick, not too thin; are really stretchy (easy to pull on), and have those grippies on the bottom, which are essential!

By: Jen Shoop

*ED NOTE: A reader wrote in to let me know that she had ordered the glass candlesticks below and was disappointed. She’d ordered an amber color and the set that arrived were a super bright red. She said the seller was responsive and refunded her, but just a caveat!

It’s that time of year: decorations packed away, the frenzy of the holidays giving way to the urge to tidy, organize, and zhush. I always feel the pull to accessorize my home this time of year. Below, a few favorite finds, all under $100 and most well under $50, with the exception of this $119 rattan side table that I’ve adored forever. Also, PSAs: these Barefoot Dreams throws are now an extra 25% off, making them under $50, and I just ordered these gorgeous bow finials ($34 for two!) to replace a boring pair in our master bedroom.

home finds under $100

GLASS CANDLESTICK HOLDERS // BRASS PLANT MISTER // SCALLOPED JUTE RUG // SCONCES // S&L PILLOW SHAMS // SCONCE SHADES // BOXWOOD // TAPER CANDLES // LEATHER DRAWER PULLS // JUTE BASKET ($13!!) // GOYARD-ESQUE MATCHES // GINGHAM BOLSTER PILLOW // DIPTYQUE SCENTED OVAL // QUILTED SHAMS // MOSS BALLS // WAVY WICKER TRAY // JULEP CUPS // JASPERWARE DISH

Even more below…

P.S. Coffee table books and styling.

P.P.S. An idea for styling your bookshelf.

P.P.P.S. My surprising attachment to a bulky dresser we’ve toted with us from home to home for over a decade.

By: Jen Shoop

Mr. Magpie is trained in the sciences and I am trained in the humanities and I was just thinking the other day how these backgrounds have oriented us differently in the way we navigate problems and texts and the analysis of any number of situations. I have observed that my husband, a trained electrical engineer, approaches problems — even lightweight ones, like which dog food to buy our pup — by virtue of process of elimination, and in a meticulously structured way. He will surface as many possible pathways to solution at the start, bearing a “no bad ideas” mindset, and then lay them all out before himself before determining some rubric for prioritizing which option to pursue first. His strategy often leans heavily on Excel formulas (cf: his mattress research). I tend to operate — quickly — on intuition instead, and this means sometimes I take a long and circuitous path and wind up back where I started and regret not having taken the time to think through all possible avenues first. On the flipside, I tend to make decisions more swiftly, which occasionally feels like an asset.

I used to think this was a personality thing, and maybe it is, but I also think that my background in English bears some responsibility for my habits in this regard. English taught me that the longer I look at something, the more possibilities I can surface. That is: the longer I sit with a text, the more possible readings I find, or the deeper the roots travel and curlicue. And so sometimes, in more trivial matters, I feel that moving briskly and — say — just picking the first dog food that appears semi-well-rated — is the best course of action, especially from the standpoint of avoiding decision fatigue or the possibility of becoming so waterlogged with information that I will have a difficult time finding my way. As Voltaire said: “The more I read, the more I acquire, the more certain I am that I know nothing.” Sometimes, then, I reason that it is OK to go with “good enough” and trust that somehow the gods of the Internet have done sufficient work on user ratings that I can use four stars as a proxy for my own research.

I say all of that semi-glibly, because I think the more profound insight of studying English is that we are meant to be path finders who illuminate by candle rather than spotlight. We raise a torch as we meander through caves and caverns, chasing possibilities, and as we do so, reveal other pathways and light up walls scribbled faintly with markings and contemplate whether we should continue further or hang out where we are. There is always more to discover. We realize we can never exhaust a text. We can never map something to its completion. We can do our best to mark a well-lit path but there will always be subterranean worlds and different points of access we’ve not yet thought of. And so sometimes I think that means I am more comfortable just starting down a path — any path — and seeing where it takes me. I’ve marched blindly into the underground enough times to realize there are always points of egress and rarely stretches at which the going gets so rough I can’t find my footing. To re-ground the metaphor: there are always grammatical choices and elements of narrative design on which to perch and make a case for whatever reading I’ve swung wildly down the stairwell with. And if there aren’t, well! Time to head back up for fresh air.

In short, is it possible that those in the sciences are trained to whittle down the list of possibilities and those in the humanities are trained to proliferate that list? It feels that we are tasked with inverted computations. To be sure, neither is inherently better than the other. In many ways, I prefer the restraint and measure and discipline I’ve seen in my husband.

I’m not sure, in any case, whether my “bias for action” is more a personality trait or a product of my education. Probably a fusion of the two.

What do you say? Have you come to similar findings?

Post-Scripts.

+I came to similar conclusions here: “the or maybes is the great gift of a degree in English, the vindication I might offer my friend, should we ever revisit the topic: the accommodation of a multitude of narrative possibilities. English trained me to look at a single word and ask: “but why this one?” and to recognize a certain rhyme scheme and ask “what if it were another?” I am forever shaped by the way those questions both exact and forgive.”

+What would you study if you were going back to school?

+If you ever find yourself in the wrong story, leave.

+On blooming where you are planted.

+Speaking of blooming: I am a late bloomer.

Shopping Break.

+These chili pepper earrings are just FUN.

+A reader recently asked me for a chic everyday crossbody in leather on the slightly larger side (“I don’t want to play tetris with my belongings every day,” she said — HA! I so get that!), and I couldn’t recommend this Oroton style quickly enough. Absolutely gorgeous and elegant and I love the pop of blue on the lining.

+Another reader was on the hunt for this mirror, which I know several of you have and love. (You can see it in a room designed by Ariel Okin here.)

+How great are these gingham sheets for a toddler bed?

+Julia Amory has some great beauty recs if you follow her on Instagram, and she insists this Mac eyeshadow in the lilac color (“Ready to Party”) is great for those with blue eyes. She swipes a bit of bronzer over the top to mute the color a bit.

+Personally, I think Laura Mercier’s “Morning Dew” eyeshadow is the perfect everyday color — it brightens the eye but does not look like you’re wearing anything. It’s the only eyeshadow I consistently buy in a one-off palette because I use it so much. Otherwise, I stick with mixed palettes — this Bobbi Brown set (on sale for only $19) is perfect.

+I am so sad this gorgeous tablecloth (currenlty on sale!) does not come in a slightly larger size because I have been looking for a festive otomi-style tablecloth for Mr. Magpie’s birthday celebration. It’s a tad too small for our dining table — hope it works for someone else!

+This Johanna Ortiz is on my mind…

+Pretty flat weave towels at a great price.

+Absolutely love these pendants.

+This sequin midi is now $80!

+Fabulous statement shorts.

+This dramatic jumpsuit!!!!

+Classic, well-priced throw blanket.

+This copper drinkware collection is SO good and on sale! Thinking of this for things like mulled wine, mules, and even eggnog. And we have a copper ice bucket that I absolutely love that cost multiple times the price of this one.

+Gorgeous spring green color.

+Gorgeous spring dress. As is this one, by the same brand — makes me want to kick off my shoes and dance!

By: Jen Shoop

We compiled all Magpie recipes into beautiful cards for your kitchen! Get the recipe card collection in your inbox here.

Mr. Magpie is head chef de cuisine in our house, but I’ve learned a thing or two observing the maestro, too. I thought I’d share some of our favorite under-the-radar gear that makes cooking more efficient, or more consistent, or more impressive, and sometimes all three.

best kitchen gear

1 // KITCHEN SCALE. We measure everything by weight. I have been surprised by how much better baking projects in particular turn out when ingredients are measured in weight! Many cookbooks provide loose approximations in volume but weight is the best path forward. We actually have this OXO scale that we love (I specifically appreciate that the display can be pulled out from the scale in situations where you are measuring something bigger than the diameter of the scale, which actually does happen with some regularity), but Wirecutter recommends this $20 style and I’m inclined to go with their rec. I personally like that their rec includes a coated surface/buttons in event of accidental spillage (which happens with fair regularity as well). Plus, it’s $20 and comes in cute colors.

2 // SPIDER STRAINER. I don’t know how we lived before this — it is in constant use in our home. Great for removing items from boiling water (i.e., green beans, carrots, etc) and especially for frying (dip item slowly into oil while in this basket to prevent splatter, then remove just as easily). This gives you the flexibility to remove items individually if ingredients/items are cooking at different rates. It’s also always readily available in our kitchen crock and therefore I find myself reaching for it when I just need to rinse a handful of berries, or drain a small amount of water, etc. I personally like this wood handled style (versus the more prevalent stainless steel ones) because it does not conduct heat, so you can be removing items from hot oil without worrying that the handle will burn you.

3 // MEAT THERMOMETER. Mr. Magpie is more confident in his ability to assess doneness via various visual and physical indicators, but I always use a thermometer for peace of mind, especially when cooking chicken. This ensures you never have to worry you’re serving something undercooked! I also reach for this in baking for various reasons. I have a candy thermometer as well but find this is great for measuring water temp out of the tap (i.e., when you need “warm” water to activate yeast and have no idea what “warm” should feel like).

4 // CHEF’S PRESS. These are presently sold out everywhere, but will be restocked in January, so keep your eyes peeled. Mr. Magpie has used these religiously for the past couple of years. The idea is that you apply these on top of a steak, chicken, etc for more even browning/searing in a pan — corners/edges/areas no longer curl up away from the pan. These are also great for griddled sandwiches and even tortillas! We have four of them. If you need additional heft, you can stack them on top of one another.

5 // OXO STRAWBERRY HULLER. If you are like Mr. Magpie, you have the patience and precision to individually hull strawberries nearly every day using a paring knife. If you are like me — a “pragmatic cook,” we’ll call it, rather euphemistically — you simply chop off the top third of the strawberry and chuck it in the garbage. Santa surprised me with this genius little huller in my stocking and we’ve been joking that it’s saved our family hundreds of dollars in discarded strawberry bits. You use the pointed edge of these tongs to insert into the berry, twist, and remove the stem/green bits without wasting much berry at all. Genius, and so easy to use!

6 // VOLLRATH QUARTER BAKING SHEETS. If you’ve been following me here for awhile, you’ll know I’ve used NordicPro baking sheets for a long time and have loved them. However, Mr. Magpie recently discovered Vollrath, and I think we will be swapping out nearly all of our sheets for this brand over time. These are even heavier duty and more reliable. I specifically encourage the quarter-sized sheet — our most used sheet pan size! — which is perfect for a handful of chicken nuggets for the littles, or a spray of walnuts for a baking project, or a couple of a baking potatoes.

7 // OXO CHERRY OR OLIVE PITTER. I have used this more than I could have ever anticipated. Prior to its purchase, I’d never have thought to include cherries in a salad, and I nearly always bought my olives pitted. This solves that problem for you. (And here is one of my favorite salads, featuring cherry, goat cheese, and bread!)

8 // RAMEKINS. The absolute best for tidy mise en place / cooking prep. Dice/chop all your ingredients and stow in these ramekins so that they are at-the-ready. We use these constantly. Bonus: they are microwave-safe, and can therefore be popped inside to soften butter, or to house hot liquids, etc.

9 // DUAL-SIDED MEASURING SPOONS. These are brilliantly designed. First, they nest inside one another magnetically, meaning that you’re never fishing around your implement drawer looking for the 1/4 tsp measure. It’s always right where you left it, hugging the 1/2 tsp measure. Second, I can’t tell you how often I need to measure two different herbs/spices/seasonings and instead of having to rinse out every time, you have two ends to use. Third, one end is wider and one end is narrower, meaning that it accommodates narrow spouts if you need them to.

10 // BENCH SCRAPER. Useful for so many reasons — great for dividing and scraping dough, but also helpful after dicing vegetables and needed to transfer them to a bowl or pan. A simple scoop with this leaves nothing on the cutting board behind.

11 // EMILE HENRY BUTTER POT. Americans are typically pretty squeamish about the potential for food spoilage and so we tend to keep butter in the fridge, unlike the French, who keep it at room temperature, in butter pots like this. We’ve recently adopted the French way and I don’t think we’ll ever look back. It is lovely to have room temperature, spreadable butter on hand at a moment’s notice, whether for toast in the morning or green beans in the evening. The secret to this particular design is a small pour of water in the basin, which you replace every 3-4 days. The water creates a seal around the lip of the butter dish that preserves it. Genius! This marble style operates similarly if you’re more into that look.

12 // LODGE HANDLE COVER. Really…handy (no pun intended) when you’ve gotten your skillet searing hot and then need to move it to a back burner. We also sometimes use this as a visual signal to one another: watch out! This pan is hot!

13 // HOMWE OVEN MITTS. Please retired your Williams-Sonoma mitts in favor of this less-expensive but far-superior pair. For reference, I feel like I was burning through the W-S ones every year or two, and you could never truly remove something from the oven for more than a second in them anyway. I bought our Homwe ones December 11, 2017 and they look good as new. The silicon tips protect hands far, far better and just hold up better in general. No brown mittens/holes! I pop these in the washing machine every few weeks (air dry afterward) and they’re spic and span.

14 // HEDLEY & BENNETT APRON. An apron is absolutely essential for a serious cook! This particular brand was dreamt up by a young cook who spent thousands (!) of hours finessing the details to make it the best possible apron, and it’s now used by tons of top-tier chefs (working in Michelin-starred restaurants!) I love her mantra: “Better gear can make you a better cook.”

P.S. Home gear I love.

P.P.S. All my favorite laundry day essentials.

P.P.P.S. Inspired by French kitchens, and the best French potato salad.

By: Jen Shoop

*Image via PJ Havel.

My Latest Snag: School Gear for Micro + Miscellany for Home.

I already shared some of my latest school gear finds for micro (who starts next week!), but the short list:

THIS LUNCHBOX IN RED WITH AN AIRPLANE MONOGRAM

THIS PENCIL BOX IN RED

THIS BACKPACK IN RED

POUCHES FOR SPARE/SOILED CLOTHES

FACE MASKS

NAME LABELS

CUP, PLATE, UTENSIL SET

YETI WATER BOTTLE

YUMBOX FOR SNACKS

I’ve been tackling some organization projects at home, so have been ordering pieces from this post, as well as a handful of other small household items I’ve been meaning to purchase for awhile now in anticipation of house guests in 2022: monogrammed hand towels, waste baskets, decorative pillows, and of course the new mattress! (More bedding/bedroom finds here.)

You’re Soooo Popular: Brights + Home Gear.

The most popular items on le blog this week:

the fashion magpie blog best sellers

12 PIECE MELAMINE DINING SET

HOT PINK BLAZER

STATEMENT SHORTS ON MEGA SALE

TRIAL SIZED DUO OF MY FAVORITE VITAMIN C OIL + A GREAT MOISTURIZER

CHIC, GLITZY FLATS

FAVORITE LS RUNNING TOP — SELECT COLORS ON SALE; SIZE UP

NEW GO-TO HOSTESS GIFT

ATTRACTIVE CLOSET STORAGE

COMBO QUILTED / TEDDY COAT (ON SALE FOR $122!)

DYSON DUPE

SWEATER PANTS

THE BEST $12 UPGRADE TO YOUR SKINCARE REGIMEN (TRUST ME!)

$60 PUFF SLEEVED TOP (COMES IN SEVERAL GREAT COLORS)

Weekend Musings: A Different You.

I came across this quote, apparently attributed to Leonardo DiCaprio (insert spectacle-wearing emoji), earlier this week:

“Every next level of your life will demand a different you.”

I thought this was an interesting take on both the demands and opportunities that come with progress and age. I wrote a few months back about how I scarcely remember Jen-in-her-20s, flying all over the place and giving presentations and working on some optimistic solutions for serious social problems pertaining to educational attainment. I think the quote above contextualizes my thoughts an interesting way: as you grow and take on new challenges (whether personal or professional or artistic or athletic), you field the often-uncomfortable push to change but also the opportunity to be born again. To be a different — hopefully better — version of yourself.

On a totally different note, the quote also reminded me of something Mr. Magpie told me in the early days of building our business together. He made the observation that what you do to earn your first customer will be different from what you do to earn your first ten customers. And that will be different from what you do to earn your first 100. And then your first 1000. And so on. This was absolutely dead-on-the-nose. A first customer might be born of a longtime personal relationship — someone willing to stick their neck out and try something because they know and love you. The first ten might be born of careful conversations with people in your network, and likely involves coupon codes and trials and hand-holding. But at 100? You’re looking at ads and conferences and marketing ploys that get you in front of 1000s of people. And at 1000, you’ve got to scale that up further: thought leadership that gets you in front of decision-makers, targeted ads, etc. And so on. I think of this often, in different contexts, even non-business ones. The basic takeaway for me is that growth is not a continuous churn of doing the same thing and getting the same output. You learn, change tack, try new things, retire what’s defunct. You become a new you along the way, exercising new muscles and wearing new hats. So, yes — every next level demands a new me.

Shopping Break.

+My girlfriend has this Gucci cardigan and I’m so envious. It’s a statement but subtle and can be worn with sooo many dresses in your closet. Sneakily wondering if I can squeeze into the size 12 in children’s and pay 1/3 the price?

+Santa brought the children these hatch-in-water toy turtles and they have been such a huge hit! You drop in cool water and they slowly emerge from their shell over 72 hours. The children have been enjoying checking on them.

+Totally swooned over this sweater.

+Perfect casual everyday pants to pair with statement knits.

+Testing a new conditioner on mini. We’ve been fans of Noodle + Boo forever but just thought I’d switch it up and I absolutely love this brand’s spray-on mineral sunscreen — the entire family uses it. The spray sunscreen is actually on sale at a good price right now, too, so I bought a few canisters now. (Come warm months, it’s always $21/bottle.)

+Gorgeous dress for a new mom at a Christening/Baptism. Stylish but not too flashy for Church.

+Barefoot-elopement-on-the-beach dreams. Or this.

+A fabulous scalloped fruit bowl for $30!

+Easy $25 LBD to have on hand for a last minute date night.

+Love this as an everyday tote in warm weather.

+This dress is gorgeous for a formal spring affair. Along the same lines, love this LSF maxi (on ridiculous sale!)

+This LSF mini (also on sale!) also just makes me smile. Love ALL THE BRIGHTS for 2022.

+Love this sherpa laptop pouch. Might just use it as a pouch, period — love tucking things like this into my everyday tote.

+These flats are fabulous. These are similar and about half the price — and y’all are in love with these!

+Just the chicest top ever ever ever. Also love this one. More great statement tops here.

+OMG THESE FLATS.

+Cute shower curtain.

+So many friends are still in waves of quarantine, isolation, exposure, etc!! UGH! Hang in there. I have been sending this doodle mat or these matchbox cars bundled with this playtape set to friends in those situations with small children at home. (More thoughts on parenting in isolation/quarantine here.)

+Love this collared sweatshirt.

+Into this crisp, sophisticated top — under $35!

+The Avenue has a great Christmas sale section — I am thinking I will order a few of these to give away Christmas treats on next year, and this gorgeous cardi is finally on sale!

By: Jen Shoop

Today, sharing a few favorite children’s books in our house at the moment. I’m omitting the Little Blue Truck series, which I read at lease once a day and cannot recommend for your sanity. (Who else can recite the majority of these books?)

+Jon Agee’s The Wall in the Middle of the Book. This is actually a fairly sophisticated metafictional piece that introduces the concept of narrative structure, suspense, climax, denouement, etc in simple language and illustration that children enjoy. It’s also quite silly, as most of Agee’s books are — mini smiles while reading this book every single time. Mini also loves his book The Other Side of Town, which makes us both laugh out loud — very clever and very silly, and it takes place in NYC, which tickles us.

+Audrey Wood’s Quick as a Cricket. I feel as though this is one of the most important books on our bookshelf, especially for my daughter. It’s basic premise: we contain multitudes. We can be “tough as a rhino” and also “gentle as a lamb,” “tame as a poodle” and “wild as a chimp.” The book suggests that we can be many things, and that all of those things are valid. J’adore, j’adore. The basic premise of my recent “Ampersands” post.

+Suzanne Lang’s Grumpy Monkey. Honestly, sometimes I need to read this book. It’s about being in a bad mood, being told to “smile and cheer up,” and realizing that sometimes you just need to be grumpy! This is a fantastic book to complement conversations you might be having at home about working through confusing/conflicting emotions.

+Jonathan Fenske’s Plankton Is Pushy. My children find this book howlingly funny. It reminds me in tone of Mo Willems’ Don’t Let the Pigeons series — animated, cartoonishly silly/frustrated, etc. Light, quick read perfect for when you’re feeling like a dramatic performance read with over-the-top voices.

+Emma Chichester Clark’s Love Is My Favorite Thing. A book all about unconditional love, even when dogs (ahem, children) choose to be naughty.

+Joseph Kuefler’s The Digger and The Flower. I think I broke a record with this one — I read this for about two months of consecutive bedtimes with micro. Maybe even longer, actually. Micro absolutely adores this book. The basic premise is that a digger discovers a flower on the build site, tends to it, and then is shattered when it’s cut down. He takes the seeds and plants them elsewhere, where he tends to them for the long haul. It is the sweetest book — I like the way it thwarts expectations (i.e., a loving digger!), reminds us to care for mother earth, and invites children to emote around these sad and then joyful happenings.

+Madelyn Rosenberg’s The Cyclops of Central Park. I’ve written about this a ton (maybe even in a past book roundup), but this is the loveliest book about balancing love of home with love of adventure. It’s also beautifully illustrated and set in NYC, which is fun for those of us who have lived there. There are some great lines — “He thought he spied the missing sheep in SoHo — and again at the Guggenheim. But his eye was playing tricks on him. “Eugene?” “No. It’s a De Kooning.”” (Yes!!!)

+Audrey and Don Wood’s The Napping House. A total classic — my mother read this book to me as a child, too, and I find the illustrations ultra-comforting for that reason. It has a nice rhythm and sequencing to it.

What about you? Any other home runs? We’ve been tearing through new books recently between our nearby library and then a book haul on Christmas morning but none of them have been quite as sticky as the ones above. Please share any favorites in your homes!

P.S. More children’s bedtime books I love and thoughts on raising a child of books.

P.P.S. What are your bedtime routines?

P.P.P.S. My everyday skincare and makeup regimen.

By: Jen Shoop

I’ve gone back and forth on the subject of new year’s resolutions over the years. On the one hand, I’m a big believer in putting things out there, on paper, if only to clarify aspirations and translate them into actionable items. (I also think there is something to the notion of “manifesting” goals by focusing on desired outcomes, though not in all cases or circumstances.) I worked in three different start-up settings and found that one of the biggest levers for progress in the early days of any new enterprise is being disciplined around 30- and 90-day plans in particular. Anything longer in scope lacks the granularity you need to feel as though you are making material progress, especially when your work load looks so different on a day-to-day basis (i.e.,: I might be setting up SquareSpace for a simple website one day, presenting to an investor the next, and working through wireframes with a designer on the third). And without the structure of a 30 or 60 or 90 day plan to remind me of the slightly broader brushstrokes at hand — God help me! So, I do feel sitting down and putting pen to paper when it comes to goals is critical.

However —

We have all been living with tremendous stress, with plans and normalcies upended and guidelines and timelines constantly changing. It is strenuous living with so many unknowns. In this context, I am reminded of the quote: “Pressure is a choice.” Do I feel now is the best time to choose to set new goals for myself? Will they be another thing to juggle and possibly feel badly about if unmet? Is now the time to opt in?

On the flip side: we are living through tough times, but we are still living our only wild and precious lives. This is not a dress rehearsal, or an ante-room, or a holding space. I am flustered at the thought of deferring meaningful personal goals because of the pandemic and then regretting those postponements later. Maybe now is the time. I am in turn reminded of the quote: “The best time to plant a tree was twenty years ago. The second best time is now.”

Where do I go with this thought train of mismatched cars? Is there a middle ground? Something between goals and inertia?

I have tried to set themes in years past — “grace” being my favorite — and I like the gentleness of this approach. It provides a north star when thinking through situations or reflecting. However, it can only offer suffused light — not the series of path torches on which I occasionally want to lean. I think, instead, this year I will set goals and then scale them back. Instead of: “run every other day,” I’ll choose “run twice a week.” Instead of: “two books a month,” I’ll choose: “Always be in the middle of reading a book.” (Who cares about the pace? Just have a book at the ready, downloaded and inviting.) Maybe 2022 is about lowering expectations and grading on a curve.

Where do you land on the subject? Does anyone have a novel approach to resolution-writing?

Post-Scripts.

+I did write resolutions last year. I did well on 3 and 4, completely fell apart on 1 and 2, and give myself middling marks on 5.

+What did you learn last year? I need to reflect on this prompt myself. Here were some learnings the last go around (in 2019). A good “learning” vintage.

+”The true meaning of life is to plant trees under whose shade you do not expect to sit.” (Do you agree?)

+Remembrances of my grandad.

+To the athlete at the start line.

+How do you start your day?

Shopping Break.

+This ridiculously stunning dress is my top contender for my sister’s deferred wedding celebration, scheduled for this spring. My mom may not approve of the cutouts but gosh isn’t it gorgeous?! (More spectacular wedding guest dresses here.)

+Ordered this adorable $15 gingham bolster pillow for mini. OMG how cute?! Wish it weren’t sold out in blue or I’d buy that one for micro’s room, too! Also available in a fun oversized floor pillow size for a reading nook.

+Fun, Celine-esque crossbody in an unexpected color. Also comes in neutral colors that may be more versatile. Love how non-flashy it is — no labels — but the shape is tres chic.

+Stocked up on Hanky Panky for 40% off here in two non-hideous colors: desert rose and shng armor.

+The sherpa vest I’ve been wearing all season (generously gifted from Talbots!) just went on sale, plus an extra 40% off, bringing the price down to like $80. Great way to get the Tuckernuck look for less. I have been surprised by how much I wear this — it’s dressier than a puffer and layers nicely over knits, but not as fussy as a faux fur. I wear it on walks, throw it on over striped Kule tees and knits at home, etc. True MVP!

+Love these cheery scalloped salad plates. Come in several colors!

+So many chic Parisian women wear these Levi’s in this color. For inspo, check out Leasy in Paris.

+Adore this statement sweatshirt. I have a similar one in black I love.

+My other favorite sweatshirt: this Kule. I wear it constantly. Perfectly proportioned and a nice thin-but-not-too-thin weight.

+These shorts are a classic and come in such great colors this season.

+Just ordered a couple of these inexpensive, classic monogrammed kitchen/guest bath towels. We will be having house guests in the new year and I am finally getting around to adding some minor touches I’ve deferred for a long, long time. I also needed a few waste baskets that we’ve gone too long without — bought one of these for the upstairs!

+Coveting these unusual (and unusually chic) shades.

+Sweet necklace for us mamas.

+Have been wearing my Alo tube socks a lot while working out lately. I own in multiple colors. Nice and thick and the colors are so fabulous. I like to pull up over black leggings for a throwback Fitness Barbie vibe.

+Love this lidded bin as a way to conceal toilet paper or truly anything (trash bags! tampons! etc!) in a guest bathroom / powder bath room. Matching trash bin available.

+Banana’s collab with Harbison yielded some truly gorgeous pieces — this one could be La Ligne!

+If you have it in you, now is a great time to buy discounted Christmas/holiday gear for next year. Crate and Barrel has a ton of fabulous stuff at 50% off, including these stocking holders, this tree collar, and these glitter fronds to tuck into a tree or arrange in a vase or on a mantel.

+Not sure if we will be continuing ballet this upcoming semester for mini — I think we will try a different extracurricular (currently searching for an art class for her age — 4, almost 5 — if any locals have recs), but this under-$20 leotard/tutu combo was a must-order. She will love! Mini has owned 2 or 3 of these more expensive ones from I Love Plum over the years and they are adorable and have a nice amount of dramatic tulle to them, but Tilly (our airedale) destroyed two of them!!!

+Incredibly sad I missed out on these shoes in mini’s size.

+I feel like a Nancy Meyers protagonist should be seen wearing this $29 turtleneck.

By: Jen Shoop

Yesterday, I was helping a Magpie find a suitable, bump-friendly spring wedding guest dress. I shared all my top picks here* (none of them are maternity — would work with bump, or without! — and I think she is buying this one!), but in the course of research, learned that SEA has marked down a ton of fabulous pieces, plus is offering an extra 15% off sale prices with code SALE21. This means you can score this gorgeous floral maxi, originally almost $500, for $168. That’s right — Anthro prices for designer duds. Pretty good! A few other pieces not to miss from the sale…

SUCH A FUN FLEECE (SEEN ABOVE)

I LIVE IN THESE KINDS OF DRESSES (ALSO THIS)…SORT OF THE MODERN DAY HOUSE DRESS! NON-CONSTRICTING, MODEST IN LENGTH, AND SO EASY TO THROW ON AND PUTZ AROUND THE HOUSE IN

THIS FUNKY SHEEP SWEATER IS IN MY CART…SO FUN! ALSO LOVE THIS EMBROIDERED FRUIT ONE

YOU CAN NEVER HAVE ENOUGH WHITE/ECRU DRESSES, AND THIS ONE IS SO ROMANTIC, AND ONLY $150 WITH CODE

*I should note most of my bump-friendly picks skew towards second trimester bumps as unfortunately I think once you get up to the 8 and 9 month range, you just have to suck it up and go with a proper maternity dress.

On the subject of fun dresses, I had been planning to throw a decent sized party for Mr. Magpie’s 40th (!) birthday this January, but in the shadow of omicron, felt that wasn’t right. We’ll be scaling down and having just a handful of his closest buddies instead, which — frankly — feels perfect, because he doesn’t see them as often any more and I know he’ll have a blast. Still, the occasion calls for something daringly festive, and I don’t care if it’s the dead of winter. My dream pick is this Borgo de Nor, but I also love (!) this Celia B, this Fanm Mom, this Alemais, or — entirely different direction — this feather-trim mini. Fun!

P.S. Thoughts on my sister’s wedding, in the era of COVID.

P.P.S. Bridal finds and more wedding guest dress options.

P.P.P.S. The most popular items on my blog this year.

By: Jen Shoop

I was reflecting the other day on friendships new and old, and wondering whether I have been doing my best at nurturing the relationships that matter most to me. Since leaving New York, I have been focused on building out my network here in the D.C. area: rekindling old friendships, getting to know my neighbors (especially the ones with young children), spending quality time with local family, and integrating my children and I into the communities at their school and assorted extracurriculars. This has necessarily meant less time for my New York friends, and Chicago friends, and select UVA friends who did not settle in the D.C. area. When Mr. Magpie tested positive for COVID and went into isolation, I initially leant most heavily on my immediate, local network — neighbors who generously dropped off puzzles and meals, local friends with young children with whom I was already in frequent, vibrant text exchanges and who generously commiserated and checked on me, and my parents and in-laws, who dropped by with deliveries of wine and fruit and diversions for the children. But within days, my longtime friends — my UVA girls, my New York crew — were coming to my aid, too. “OMG” was the prominent message, followed by “Hang in there” and often an Amazon delivery with a surprise for the children. (Now, less than a month later, no one at all would be shocked — I feel nearly all of us have had some permutation of isolation and quarantine in our households. But at the time, in late November, it felt out of the blue, after two years of avoiding the damn thing.)

Two days after Mr. Magpie came out of isolation, just after we’d restarted quarantine because micro had tested positive, he asked me: “How did you do this by yourself?” But the truth was — I hadn’t. I’d been totally carried by friendship and micro-maneuvers recommended by friends that enabled me to give myself the grace I needed to make it through.

I sat down one afternoon and wrote thank you notes to the flock of friends who had lifted me during those eighteen long days at home. There were notes to girlfriends who shared cheap apartments and decrepit houses with me in Charlottesville, Virginia right alongside notes to neighbors who have sat with me on the cul de sac in front of my suburban home watching our young children scoot and bike and chase one another over the past six months. Notes to friends who have seen me at my absolute worst — crying in fraternity bathrooms over unimportant things — and notes to friends who have seen only the surface of me, the filtered version we all present when making acquaintances. To the latter, I might be Jen-whose-children-wear-bows-and-jon-jons or Jen-who-likes-to-give-out-holiday-treats-with-personalized-tags or, I hope, Jen-who-lent-me-something-when-I-needed-it. These are tender-footed relationships that might slowly bronze into longtime friendships that involve vacationing together and sitting on the porch talking into the cicada song and sticky heat of D.C. at night, or that might trickle into occasional run-ins at birthday parties and friendly waves while running through the neighborhood. It is hard to know how to mete out the appropriate amount of energy when I am blessed by friends who have already traveled so far with me, who have given me sidelong looks, and enormous, silent hugs, and sometimes a squeeze of the hand when I have needed those things and God! Aren’t we lucky to have girlfriends?! To lend us tissues and “going out tops” and shoulders to cry on and covers to borrow and snarky memes when we need them and eye rolls at the idiocies of ex-boyfriends when we need those, too, and big, long pockets of silence into which to pour our hearts.

I think sometimes those intimacies will be hard to find in new relationships. I have such deep roots and long-tailed, shared histories with my older friends and so I feel it is natural and comfortable to turn to them without worrying about how I might be “coming off” to a newer acquaintance. And yet — so interesting the way proximity has played into the way I spend my friendship time these days. Pre-omicron, I was having coffee dates and lunches and dinners with newer or rekindled friendships, and often those stretches absorbed the time I might otherwise dedicate to calling or emailing or texting girlfriends to catch up. It has been thrilling to connect with new women in a similar life stage with similar points of reference but who come from all different backgrounds and histories and points of view — to bond, to exclaim, to commiserate, to see myself anew. At the same time, it has occasionally felt as though I am cheating my longtime friends of my friendship. And it is strange, too, that my ring of newer friends and especially my neighbors tend to know more about what’s happening with us than my close, longtime friends, simply by virtue of logistics — i.e., we had to alert our local friends to the possibility of exposure to COVID, and to explain why our children couldn’t play with theirs or why were absent from various functions, and so on.

How do you balance these forces? How do you honor the friends that have been there while staying open to the good fortune of meeting good people in your 30s and 40s? How much of yourself do you keep open? How much do you reserve? I am such an enormous believer in providence that I feel many of the people that appear in my life are there for a reason, and I owe them my attention. As an example, I have spent some time with a childhood friend of my brother’s and he has for various coincidental reasons brought my deceased girlfriend Elizabeth back into my life in a meaningful way. I am profoundly grateful for that path-crossing. I cannot help but feel God’s hand in it.

As with many of these queries, the answer is probably fluid. We might devise some rubrics to help — i.e., who do I feel my best around? — but we might give more of ourselves to new friends today and more to our old ones tomorrow, and that’s OK.

Post-Scripts.

+On female friendships and the things that matter.

+Hosting girlfriends at home.

+The art of the handwritten note.

+On recognizing the effort.

+Building friendships through motherhood.

+I miss my girlfriend Elizabeth so much.

+Attention is a form of love.

Shopping Break.

+This $36 feather-trim robe is beyond fabulous. Zsa Zsa Gabor vibes.

+This colorblocked puffer is SO chic — be the most fun mom in the school pick-up line. The color palette reminds me of these amazing NBs.

+FUN, dramatic date night top in the black. Prefer it tucked in so it’s not too voluminous.

+This popular striped midi dress is now on sale for under $160. Love! Would look great with suede boots.

+Have seen these DL1961 jeans on a lot of chic people lately. Also come in a great ecru color for a winter white moment.

+I went back for a second helping of J. Crew sale finds for little ones (round one here) and bought micro some more everyday clothes. He starts school (!) next week and was feeling like we needed some extra clothes to send him into school with (see aforementioned toilet training) and some fresh duds in general since he’s suddenly way too tall for his size 2 wardrobe. I bought a couple of these tees and henleys (around $11 with code BIGSALE), these lined dock pants, and these sweats in the gray to pair with his rugby shirts and LS polos.

+Also bought him another rugby, some cord joggers, and a few pairs of socks at J&J while on sale!

+These weathertight bins are the absolute best — we have them in all different shapes and sizes — but I found them at a great deal for a pack of 6. These can be used in basements, garages, etc, as they seal closed and keep things dry and secure. I mainly use mine for things like holiday decorations, tabletop, ribbons/bows, etc.

+Such a great idea for a young man or lady — a daily gratitude journal calibrated to children under 10.

+Ridiculously chic Veronica Beard finds for 40% off — yes pls and yes pretty pls.

+Scalloped rash guard if you’re lucky enough to be packing for a winter getaway. More finds along these lines here.

+Even though I’m going nowhere, I keep finding myself drawn to warm weather clothes: this dress, these sandals.

+I’ve written about this elsewhere, but these bandaids are not only cute but really adhesive. Great for little ones, since they actually stay put!

+Gorgeous jeweled cardigan at a fab price.

+Everyone’s favorite fleece in the prettiest shade of ice blue.

+Handful of classic Hunter boots for littles on sale here.

+Zimmermann on sale, and an extra 25% off with code EXTRA25.

+A step stool for those of us in the throes of toilet training.

+These swan statement earrings are beyond amazing —

+As is this anorak. Wow.

+Getting better about sharing all my latest finds here, in one stream.

By: Jen Shoop

*Image above featuring micro’s new backpack and the flag we’ve used for first and last days of school these past few years, whose colors you can customize!

I’ve been doing some shopping — mainly for micro — the past few weeks, as we move through toilet training and prepare for school next week. I cannot believe we are here. Some parenting moments unexpectedly take the wind out of me. When I took micro for a visit day at his new school in November, I retreated to my car and wept over the steering wheel. It was the strangest sensation, as I had not felt it brewing in the least. I’d been shades of chipper and all-business the entirety of the morning, and then I closed the door of my car and burst into uncontrollable tears. I drove down to Furst Bakery on Connecticut Avenue immediately afterward in a paroxysm of emotion and at some point caught a glimpse of myself in the rear view mirror and burst into simultaneous laughter. I mean, really! What a nut! It wasn’t even the true first day of school — I still had a month of his voice chirping around the house all day long to cherish. (And boy did I get what I wished for — a string of eighteen days in his constant presence, followed by the chaos of Christmas and the no-man’s-land that is the week before the new year.) But motherhood is like that, I find: the tiniest tug might lever the most enormous lurch of the heart. Sort of like fishing, I think: a little nibble, you reel, and you might find a whale at the other end of the line.

Anyhow, I’ll be weepy all week. I struggle with these transitions, which I presume to be a normal condition of motherhood. But we will make it to the other end, whale in tow and all.

Below, some of the fruits of my shopping….

childrens finds winter 2021-2022

SPARKLY HAIR CLIPS

PUFFER JACKET

WEE ONES BOW — BEST COLOR…SORT OF A GRAY-LAVENDER-TAUPE-MAUVE

GOLDEN GOOSE SNEAKERS

PERSONALIZED PENCIL BOXES

CONDIMENT MINI SQUEEZE BOTTLES

THESE RIBBED DRESSES ARE ON SALE FOR ONLY $14 — COME IN MORE COLORS, TOO

FRILLY SOCKS

BEACH OR SNOW (!!) PAIL AND MOLD SET

LS LACOSTE POLO

NAME LABELS

VANS HI-TOPS (SUCH A GOOD BLUE!)

TODDLER BOY UNDIES

STEP STOOL

ART STORAGE PORTFOLIOS

YUMBOX MINI – PERFECT FOR PACKING SNACKS! I USUALLY DO FRUIT ON ONE SIDE AND SOMETHING CRUNCHY ON THE OTHER (GRANOLA BALLS, PRETZELS, GOLDFISH)

$15 FLEECE

VELCRO SUPERGAS

PARAVEL BACKPACK

BASEBALL KEYCHAIN

P.S. More cute children’s finds here, and in case your little one is a dino fiend.

P.P.S. Layette finds here.

P.P.P.S. Was overwhelmed by the solidarity of moms sharing the same feelings in response to this post. Thank you! None of us are alone!

By: Jen Shoop

*Image above via Dylan Parienty…whoever did her makeup needs an award! Love!

I’m back with more candid reviews of hyped beauty products today!

+Chantecaille Faux Cils Longest Lash Mascara. I went into this product thinking — “for $72, this mascara better change my life.” Unfortunately, it did not live up to the heavy hype for me. It does deliver a gorgeous, long lash but I found it flaked easily and left me with a little ring of black under my eyes more often than not. One day while testing this product, I used my Giorgio Armani mascara on one eye and Chantecaille on the other and frankly they delivered similar results in terms of lash lengthening, separation, etc, but my Armani did not smear/flake/etc. I say you can save your money and skip this one! I still think Armani makes the best mascara of all time, and you can get it on sale here.

+dpHue Apple Cider Vinegar Rinse. Per the site: “This shampoo substitute will gently cleanse and remove impurities without stripping the natural oils that are essential to the health of your scalp and hair.” ACV is supposed to be excellent for hair strength and luster — something to do with balancing the scalp’s pH — and is safe (encouraged!) for color-treated hair. My mom and I tested the rinse separately and then compared notes. We both agreed the applicator is kind of difficult to get the hang of – you can’t really tell how much you’re applying and I could never tell whether I’d adequately coated all my hair/scalp with it since it doesn’t “suds” up, you’re applying in a little stream, and your hair is already wet. Over time, I realized you have to apply quite a bit of this product to your hair — I swear I use almost 1/8th or 1/10th of a bottle per treatment? — to get the full effect, or at least it felt that way to me. For that reason, I went from applying every few days to every week or every other week so that it’s not quite such an expensive treatment. I love (!) how my hair and scalp feel after applying — clean, cool, thoroughly cleansed. My hair absolutely looks shinier and happier afterward. I do feel that my hair looks dirtier more quickly after using, though — I usually wash my hair every 2-3 days and my hair still looks great up until the moment I do so. With this, I am dying to wash my hair by the second day. I’m not sure if that means I need to use this for longer so my scalp adjusts? I’m not sure. For now, I think I’ll continue to use until I’ve finished my rinse bottle and then evaluate whether I miss it after not having it for a few weeks. This may also be the kind of thing I buy and use once a month when I feel my hair looks dull. I would say it’s great if you’re having a case of the blahs with your hair but not sure it’s worth the expense for regular use.

+dpHue Apple Cider Vinegar Leave-In Therapy. I absolutely love this stuff (!). I find it more effective than the rinse, and a far better value at that, though I suppose they do very different things. This therapy is a primer you spritz on your hair after showering. I swear my hair has never been softer, more detangled, or more lustrous — I swear it gives me Veronica Lake hair, i.e., shiny with a kind of halo effect? It’s incredible! My mother did not have as strong of a positive reaction to this as I did, so it could just be well-suited to my hair type (I have fine, straight hair but a lot of it). The site claims it speeds up drying time. Not sure about that claim — I’m more impressed with the way it coats the hair to detangle, shine, and give a great hand-feel. I’m in love love love.

+Follain Hydrating Mask. This is a solid mask for dry skin. I find I reach for my other masks first, mainly because I usually want to a use masks to brighten, clear, revive my skin versus hydrate it, but when my skin has been feeling tight/dry from the cold winter air, I apply this at night and sleep in it and sometimes even use it a sub for a daily moisturizer if really in need. It’s scent-less, gentle, and has a nice lightweight viscosity to it. I liked it for what it was but it’s not the kind of thing I’ll be sending to all my girlfriends in a flurry of excitement. (Clarins’ mask, on the other hand…AHHH! Holy grail. Clarins generously sent me a gift box in December and I usually try to give away any cosmetics/skincare I already have to sisters/friends/my nanny but I absolutely, selfishly kept everything in the box, including this mask and HRH The Double Serum, because I use them myself religiously.)

+Clarins Total Eye Lift. In that Clarins box, I also received their new eye lift cream. Unfortunately, the search for an eye cream that does anything but hydrate continues…! I mean, hydration in the eye area is critical, and I do notice I look more tired when I skip that step (plus, eye makeup/undereye concealer does not go on as well) — and Clarins’ eye lift does moisturize the area beautifully. It has a nice formula that blends well, and I like the applicator — a tiny pump delivers just the right amount. (Can we all agree that applicators/bottles can totally change/improve/destroy your opinion of a product?) But for $90? I would frankly go back to my $30 Olay pot, which achieves a similar effect. I do think Olay is a bit greasier/harder to absorb than some of the eye creams/treatments from prestige skincare brands, but not sure that a difference in grease level is worth 3x the price.

+Billie Lip Balm. I threw this on to my latest Billie order (I have a subscription for their razor blades and their vitamin c wipes — and adore and strongly rec both) and would say it’s a decent, inexpensive, tinted balm to keep in your purse. I’d liken it to Fresh’s Sugar Rose Balm, but less than half the price. I like the way it feels going on (velvety soft) and the tiny bit of color it applies to my lips, but I don’t think it solves chapped lips in any meaningful way. But really does any lip balm really work for more than maybe an hour? (I read somewhere that we don’t really need lip balm and that it just tampers with your natural ability to moisturize your own lips? I don’t know.)

+Biossance Vitamin C Oil. I’ve written about this in dribs and drabs in other posts, but wanted to include it here for reference/ease of access in case you’re looking for it in the future. I love (!!) this product. I am obsessed with Vitamin C for skin — I swear it has been the key to unlocking brighter skin for me over the past year or two. I have had great results with almost every vitamin C product I’ve used, but I’ve been on the hunt for ages for one with a great application/formula. I’ve had ones that feel a bit sticky, ones that feel runny, ones that smell weird, etc. This is far and away my favorite formula I’ve tried to date. This is an oil, not a serum. That startled me at first, but I’ve come to absolutely love it, especially in the winter, when I find it doubles as a hydrating skincare layer. I apply this directly to cleansed skin, applying a drop or two to my forehead and a drop on each cheek, and then blending thoroughly with my hands. Oh joy! My skin looks immediately so much brighter and happier and illuminated! Unlike other oils, this absorbs fairly quickly and has a nice, light weight. (It’s not dense like olive oil or something.) I have found that a bottle of this stuff is lasting me forever and I use it daily! I found that I ran through other brands (especially Ole Henriksen) so much more quickly. All in, a solid value, a great formula, and incredible results. Very strong praise for this product. I noticed that Biossance is selling a special value mini kit where you can try their oil and their popular moisturizer in mini sizes for $25. A good way to evaluate whether the oil will work for you and also test another product!

+French Girl Rose Lip Scrub. Can’t remember if I’ve reviewed this but just rediscovered this when sorting through my cosmetics the other day. I would say this is neck and neck with sara happ’s formula — you can’t go wrong with either, but you need one. This is the antidote to red wine lips — ugh! I use this to scrub off red wine residue at the end of the night and then slather with Elizabeth Arden 8-Hour cream, and I also use this before a big night out when I want to apply lip color. Simply a MUST for winter lips. Either brand is great! I perhaps slightly prefer the sweeter/fruitier flavors Sara Happ has (kind of weird to taste rose?) but truly both are excellent.

+Slip Hair Ties. I wrote about this yesterday and I know this must sound so frivolous, but — seriously, where have these been my whole life? I am…strangely infatuated with these. I find them so much easier to use to tie my hair back with than standard Goody’s (easier to stretch, no risk of having them snap on your fingers) and they actually hold hair in place and leave no crease. Great for washing hair before bed/throwing hair up while putting on a mask. I seriously…! I love these!? Treat yourself!

+Oribe Dry Texturizing Spray. If I let my hair air-dry over night (my favorite indulgence: going to bed with wet hair), I curl it into loose waves in the morning and set with this texturizing spray. It smells like heaven and holds hair in place, but never makes it crispy/crunchy. Frankly, though, I think this is just about the same as Ouai’s spray in terms of results, but Ouai’s formula is about half the price, so would start there.

A couple of beauty products I’ve purchased/plan to purchase to review over the next few months…

+slopehill hair dryer — people claim this is the best Dyson dupe on the market.

+Le Prunier Plum Beauty Oil — I need another step in my skincare regimen like I need a hole in my head (and I already apply an oil and a serum in the morning!) but I keep hearing fantastic things about this oil, which “brightens, balances, and restores skin while locking in moisture for a soft, youthful glow.” Also, Chrissy Tiegen uses it.

+K-18 Molecular Hair Mask — if Courtney Grow’s enthusiasm on this matter is to be trusted (and she’s not yet led me astray on the beauty product discovery front — still deeply grateful to her for introducing me to this oil cleanser, which I use every morning and will never quit), this mask is the bees knees for anyone with color-treated (especially bleached) hair.

Last but not least, two inexpensive products I now buy on subscribe & save using Prime (i.e., I love them so much and know how frequently I go through them, so I don’t even want to think about having to order): Differin (a retinoid — I use this every other night before bed and think this has also been a key to brighter, clearer skin) and Nyx’s eyeliner. I actually wear eyeliner most days — just a tiny thin swipe along my upper lashes to help define the eye a bit. I rarely wear color on my lids or lips on a daily basis but I do like a defined eye. I slick on Nyx (so easy to apply with the pen-like applicator) and apply a few coats of mascara! I’m never ever without mascara!

P.S. More honest beauty reviews here, here, and here.

P.P.S. Are you a candle or a mirror?

P.P.P.S. What would you study if you were going back to school tomorrow?

By: Jen Shoop

*Image above via J. Crew.

I don’t know if it’s just the need for something cheerful to look at or what, but I have been mainly drawn to bright colors at the moment — not only hot pink but chartreuse and kelly green and cobalt blue, too. Colors just shy of neon. Three items currently at the top of my shopping list: these gorgeous Missoni pants to wear as the weather starts to turn (imagine with a simple white tee or my favorite silk blend mockneck); this punchy $130 Hermes-inspired bag; and this hot pink sweater dress, selling fast and currently on sale for under $80.

Below, even more punchy favorite finds in this vein:

bright clothing trend 2022

HUNTER BELL TOP // GUCCI SCARF // EVERLANE SOCKS // MADEWELL BEANIE // J CREW MOCKNECK // $30 CHARTREUSE SWEATER // THESE MISSONI PANTS ARE IN MY CART // MINI KELLY-STYLE BAG ($130!) // GUCCI SCARF // BORGO DE NOR DRESS // RACHEL COMEY JUMPSUIT // KATE SPADE FLATS // LOVESHACKFANCY FAIR ISLE // GUCCI SNEAKERS

Shop these and other BRIGHT finds for 2022 below:

P.S. At the opposite end of the spectrum…

P.P.S. Recent Target finds.

P.P.P.S. Prayer by name.

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