Eric Jerome Dickey wrote: “Every day, a million miracles begin at sunrise.”
This is the energy I want to bring to my every morning. I aspire to start my day in prayer; some days it happens, other days it doesn’t. Sometimes, despite the best intentions, my emotional focus rolls away from me like yarn. When I am too scattered to put myself in the right frame of mind for prayer, I think I will repeat these words to myself — a prayer in their own way, anyhow. In them are hope and wonderment. In them are a firm planting in the rhythms of the natural world: the sun still rises and the branches still bend and tomorrow there will be more crocuses opening their slender petals to the sun in the embankment of dirt along our driveway.
+Ulla Johnson vibes in the prettiest shade of lilac for under $70.
+Adore the periwinkle blue color on this dress. I own this dress in a different pattern and it is SO dramatic and flattering on. I find this dress runs small — the smocking is very tight/not as stretchy as, say, a nap dress.
+Adorable everyday dress. Wear with Carrie Forbes sandals (on sale for $100), or these fun raffia ones (also under $100).
+This white scalloped linen skirt and matching tank — wowza. I am so all about the skirts this season and this set just jumped to the top of my list.
+Dermstore is offering 20% off a ton of great products, including the best facial sunscreen on earth (full review here) and my beloved glowscreen, which I wear daily.
+Just a reminder that these are the best pens on earth. I am obsessed. Love the colors, the ultra fine tip, the gel ink, and the feel of the pens themselves.
+Have you seen Banana’s new children’s collection? I am swooning over this precious set. The pattern is so good!
+Boden is killing it at the moment with its new dresses. I love this, this, and this.
+These sticker books (this bunny one is also cute) are fantastic for children — the quality is incredible! — but they take awhile to ship. Order now for Easter baskets!
Neiman’s is running such a compelling promotion on fashion and beauty right now through tomorrow — $50 off orders of $200, $100 off orders of $400, and $275 off orders of $1000 with code FASHION, with seriously high-end brands that rarely go on sale included. Some of my favorite fashion finds on sale below. I know many of you have been buying these Cara Cara dresses specifically for Baptisms, newborn photos, and family portraits (it’s so flattering, has sleeves — a key sticking point for many of us having our photos taken professionally!, and comes in such great prints) so this is a good opportunity to score a pretty one in a dashing print on sale for $100 off. I used the promotion to snag this Celia B. dress I’ve been eyeing. It is so whimsical — Rainbow Brite vibes — and just what I want to wear when going out for cocktails with friends. It also comes in a peplum top version that would be adorable with white jeans or high-waisted trousers. I am also tempted by basically every dress from Carolina K (several seen below) — I feel like I’d live in this dress this summer!
So much great beauty on sale — it would be easy to spend $200 and get $50 off! Or you can use some of these products to tip you to a higher sale price if you’re at, say, $375 and you just need to spend $25 to reach the $400 tier and get $100 off. The sale includes my favorite lip color of all time, Chantecaille’s Bourbon Rose Lip Chic, my favorite high-end shampoo, and Clarins’ life-changing double serum. See all my picks below…almost all of which I’ve written about as best-of-breed, holy-grail products!
I have been a delinquent reader the past many months. I was optimistic for a spell and then found myself just wanting to sleep when I used to stay up reading. I am currently listening to James Clear’s Atomic Habitsbook, which seems to be enjoying something of a resurgence — I feel like everyone is listening to this at the moment. I remember it making a big splash back when it came out in 2018 and I was peripherally aware of its agenda. At the time, I thought — “Not for me.” But after a long season of permitting myself small pockets of grace in my various pursuits (go easy on yourself! it’s a pandemic!), I now feel as though I could stand to lace up the boots a bit. Perhaps others feel the same way, which might explain why I’ve been seeing it everywhere lately, and why the library indicated a 10-week wait for the audiobook. Anyhow, reading the book feels meta, mirror-like: I am reading about habit formation in order to form the habit to read more. I wish I’d read it earlier because making my way through Marilynne Robinson’s Home just prior required massive commitment and energy on my part. It was a slow read. I don’t know that I’d have finished it were it not for the arbitrary convening of a few girlfriends to discuss it over a bottle of red wine. Here is the thing: Robinson is intellectually dazzling. As a component of her constellation of writings, Home is, well, a home run. It is a sibling to her highly-praised Gilead book, re-telling much of the same story (the return of a wayward son to a religious family/community) from the perspective of another character. I typically enjoy such set-ups, which remind us rather vigorously to exercise circumspection in accepting the stories others put before us or — put more generously — the richness of approaching the same concept from multiple perspectives. They are also phenomenal feats of dexterity and intellectual clarity on the part of the author. In this case, there is such a dense and intellectually interesting nest of patterns and inversions to sort through, too: homes and exiles; siblings; sins lived out and atoned for across multiple generations; recursions; plot repetitions; etc. The main question I pondered: what is a home? It is provocative that Robinson named her first book “Gilead” (the geographical setting and “hometown” for the characters in both books) but the other the more metaphorical “Home.” Isn’t Gilead home for all of its characters? Is it not? What are we meant to take away from the delta between the two? There are also complex social issues raised, and head-on grapplings with Gospel, faith, and specifically predestination. This is Big Stuff — metaphysical! — and she writes through and around it all with precision and authority.
However. I feel as though the writing gets in the way of Robinson’s hyper-accurate grasp on the complicated and nuanced dynamics between family members and faith. Her writing reads like exposition. It is impressive, well-formed, but difficult to connect with on an emotional level, which presents as a problem in a book about family. At points, I felt as though I was reading something exegetical where I wanted something personal. I don’t know whether this critique is valid. Perhaps that is just her mode of writing, or perhaps it is her carefully calibrated tone for the book for reasons more esoteric than I can fetch. She is, certainly, writing within the context of the ecclesiastical, and several characters are ministers, so perhaps it all tracks in a general sense — but still, it felt as though something was out of key. And that made reading and specifically connecting with the characters difficult.
However, I did find myself musing on the gently overlapping themes of home, exile, movement, stasis, prison, escape, departure. She is clearly trying to tell us something about the homes we grow up with and the ones we choose. Perhaps, too, the ones chosen for us in some sense owing to familial dynamics? I feel a tug at the end of the line there: just last weekend, I was chatting with a mom who mentioned that she tries hard not to label any of her three children in a specific way. She mentioned one of her children has “particularly big emotions” and then rewound and said: “I mean, we all do – I am sensitive to not labeling her in any way, of making her feel like ‘the really dramatic one.'” And my goodness have we been wearing out the “Encanto” soundtrack (any other moms with “Encanto”-obsessed children?) and there, too, the theme of being pushed into and then finding oneself stuck in certain roles in a family. There is something sticky there: the observation that homes can be both safe spaces and quagmires, often with no mal-intent.
Have you read Home? What did you make of it? Did you prefer it to Gilead?
+I am currently reading this thriller as a palate cleanser.
+Extra 25% off Mille’s sale section with code EXTRA25! I absolutely love (!) this dress and wore it a ton last summer. Can’t wait to pull it out again this season. I had to use the promo to buy this fun green printed top. Note that this brand runs really big.
+Cutest scalloped cheese board for your next wine night with girlfriends!
+I know I’ve mentioned this touch and feel book a bunch, but both of my children have loved it. The letters are raised and the illustrations are really dynamic/dramatic. It makes a great gift because it looks adorable (and it’s substantive — like 2″ thick!) on a bookshelf. More of my children’s favorite books here and here.
+People lose their minds over these ESWBs (emotional support water bottles — if you follow Tinx, you know what I’m talking about).
+Adorable, well-priced mirror for a child’s room or powder room!
+Just ordered this exact dutch process cocoa powder for a baking project! It’s supposed to be le best.
+I had to buy this dress — it’s so me. I love this cut and length for easy everyday dresses in warmer weather.
+Sometimes Old Navy has really great, cheap denim — this is a super on-trend cut and wash.
Pair any of these with everyone’s favorite jeans and be on your way!
If you have littles, Petite Plume made shamrock pajamas this year!
Q: Roman shades! And home decor inspired by Harbour Island.
A: I have had Lynn Chalk in mind forever — I’ve seen her work used by many interior designers, but you can buy yourself via Etsy. If you are looking for something simpler/not wanting to use designer fabrics, I love the look of a simple Greek Key or border style. For something more coastal in vibe (which it sounds like you may be after), I’ve heard great things about the ones from Annie Selke!
For Harbour-Island-inspired decor, you are so in luck. This vibe is majorly trending. S&L comes to mind of course (we have so many pieces from them, including our headboard, primary bedroom rug, and my beloved dresser) but Target, Urban Outfitters, and Anthro have some incredible finds for less. And faux palm fronds are always a great way to get the look without breaking the bank. Last but not least, check out this fabulous indoor/outdoor jute rug for only $259!
Q: Under-$100 tote bag that looks more expensive than it is.
Q: Palm Beach wedding at art gallery, beginning of April.
A: Oo, fun! I would wear De Loreta (comes in a different style if you love the fabric but not the asymmetrical style)! Many more wedding guest dress options here, here, here.
Q: Best strapless bra?
A: I have heard many, many people rave about Wacoal’s as the gold standard for strapless and have been considering it for awhile, but — because I consider strapless bras torture devices, I fastidiously avoid them if at all possible, preferring skin covers if needed. If I absolutely must, I’ve been making do with these passable, inexpensive Gap ones for the past many years. You are making me wonder about finally investing in the Wacoal, though, because I have been wearing a lot of skirts (some current season favorites here) the past few seasons that I like to pair with these seamless tanks, which require a strapless.
Q: Boy nursery art.
A: I like the idea of Andy Warhol reproductions blown up huge or printed on stretched canvas, traditional-looking reproductions of ship paintings, animal illustrations like these, and framed maps of places significant to the child (i.e., birthplace, favorite vacations, etc). I feel like most of these age well with children / can be placed elsewhere as children grow up! I also like the idea of decals like these on a wall, or woven animals like this or this.
Q: Nursery bookshelf or console.
A: Crate + Kids does such great pieces in interesting colors/shapes, and I personally think Crate & Barrel products are the best in breed at their pricepoint — well-made, sturdy, etc. You might consider this or this. More expensive, but I love this style from Cait + Kids, and it comes in great colors. I’ve written about this elsewhere, but we have Ikea’s similar but crazy affordable cube Kallax system in our playroom (used to be in my daughter’s bedroom in NYC), and we really love how accessible this keep all of the children’s gear. We lined the bottom row with bins and keep different categories of toys in each one — one for dress-up, one for play food, etc. I personally like the size of the cubes — it makes keeping books upright/organized much easier than in bookshelves with longer dimensions. Target has a very similar style they just put on sale, too.
If you want more of a storage console, I love the ones from Bungalow 5!
Q: Bump-friendly (~6 months) formal dress in pink, green, or a floral in either of those colors.
A: Congratulations! I can’t tell whether the slip on this dress would be too restrictive, but worth a shot — dramatic, chic, fun. I also think this Zimmermann could work because of cut. And this is just gorgeous (and well priced)! I love it and would definitely work with bump. However, I did feel that in the final trimester going with an actual maternity dress was easiest for these affairs — I think this is super fun, and this is pretty paired with some big earrings.
Q: Teak outdoors dining chairs.
A: I like these ones from PB, these ones from World Market, and these lattice-backed ones from Birch Lane. While we’re talking outdoor dining, I have to mention Target has the chicest patio set just out — these chairs with this little table and these iron planters. And some great tabletop finds for al fresco meals here!
Q: Masks for littles having an option to rest on their neck?
A: I think you might be looking for a mask chain! This was really helpful with my daughter in particular. I like this one for girls, this one for boys.
Q: Gifts for my boyfriend’s birthday.
A: Some great gift ideas for men here as a starting point. I feel like the best strategy for a great gift for a guy is thinking about the way he moves through his day and looking for gifts that will make his everyday life just better, more fashionable, easier, upgraded, etc. This is something we used to say in the design world: “look for the duct tape.” As in: which areas of life is he currently “making do” with some solution that you could make better? Maybe he has a few chipped mugs and he’s always complaining about his coffee getting cold (our favorite coffee gear here), or maybe he always comes home from his morning walk with the dog with wet feet (I bought Mr. Magpie these rainboots). Or maybe he loves cooking but could use a glow up in the gear department — some great kitchen gear to amp up his cooking game here.
All that said, a few items I would personally love to give Mr. Magpie just based on his personal interests:
SOFA FOR BASEMENT — WE HAVE SO FAR TO GO IN OUTFITTING OUR HOME BUT HE TALKS OFTEN ABOUT HOW MUCH HE’D LOVE TO WATCH SPORTS IN THE COLD BASEMENT
SECOND FRIDGE FOR BASEMENT — HE IS ALWAYS TAKING ON ELABORATE COOKING PROJECTS AND IT WOULD BE SO NICE FOR HIM TO STOW HIS PICKLING JARS AND BRINING MEATS AND STARTERS IN A ROOMY SECOND SPACE
P.S. My favorite resortwear finds here, and great swim here.
By: Jen Shoop
If you are ever in a fashion rut, take a minute to peruse Jenny Walton’s Instagram feed (seen above). She manages to gesture to the style of decades past without ever seeming costume-like. She inspired the finds below, and there are some absolute budget buys mixed in here, including this $22 Hermes-inspired band for your Apple watch, these Bottega-inspired sandals, and this $115 statement dress, which looks like it could be by Prada or Dries Van Noten or something.
I have also had sad occasion to buy a black dress for a funeral recently and spent some time looking for something appropriate. My favorites were this Theory, this CO dress, and this Elie Tahari. More black dresses, many appropriate for services, below:
P.S. More sophisticated finds here, and some great basics for the new year here.
P.P.S. “Wintering is a time of withdrawing from the world, maximizing scant resources, carrying out acts of brutal efficiency and vanishing from sight; but that’s where the transformation occurs. Winter is not the death of the life cycle, but its crucible.” More here.
But some days it bears re-reading, and seeds new tendrils of interpretation. Have these lines really always been there, in the middle, as though incumbencies for my future self?:
“Tell me about despair, yours, and I will tell you mine.
Meanwhile the world goes on.
Meanwhile the sun and the clear pebbles of the rain are moving across the landscapes,
over the prairies and the deep trees, the mountains and the rivers.”
A reminder that texts are mirrors, or receivers, or some kind of malleable medium in which we are graced to learn about ourselves and the world around us.
I wrote last week about the death of a colleague and received such wonderful notes, some from individuals who knew him and others from empathetic strangers. It felt good to remember him in many of these exchanges: its own kind of therapy. I will need to write separately on this insight, but I have learned in my life that people surprise you in the most wonderful ways when you let them in. There is a great comment in the show “Sex Education” where a mother chides her son for not letting her know about a competition in which he is competing, adding: “People like to know about these things. People like to show up.” This has proven true in my narrow life in matters big and small. You open the door, and there is Anna with a bag of groceries, and there is Mike with a thoughtful note. We are born to huddle together.
It took some of those conversations late last week for me to realize that I had been accommodating a sense of remove or formality in my own grief, as though I was not entitled to admit how profoundly I have felt this loss because I was not close to Nate at the end of his life. Life moves, quickly, and colleagues fall out of touch: there is no malice or evil in it. I had not spoken with Nate in perhaps two years. Because of that ellipsis I had an instinct to deflect. Even telling my mother felt strange and performative. I was sad but sensed in some way that I must not lay claim to that sadness and so I found myself changing the subject. Instead, I would walk Tilly lost in thought. I woke up several times each night after I heard the news in a kind of breathless panic thinking of him. I felt very strongly a sense of sequestration in my own thoughts — “Meanwhile the world goes on,” I observed, partly cajoling myself, while I sat stock-still and stuck.
For a time I spent more of my life with Nate than nearly anybody else, and it was not until a fellow colleague shared a sense of resentment over the fact that his last exchange with Nate had been trivial and some time ago that I found myself writing: “But it is OK to grieve, and profoundly, even if you have not been particularly close recently.” A memo to myself, really.
There are no rules to grief. It can come barreling down a highway at you or delicately cloud your vision, vapor-like and immaterial. It can move and it can stick. We can grieve people we knew intimately yesterday and those we have not seen in years. We can grieve people midway around the world enduring a senseless war, and for neighbors whom we’ve seen every day for years but never truly gotten to know. There are no checkpoints, no permissions needed. There are no proper ways to grieve.
And meanwhile the world goes on, in a forward march both therapeutic and cruel. One of the great difficulties of accepting death: life continues, more or less business as usual. How can it be? I say this pointedly, writing from my usual perch in my usual routine, while women like me are enduring other-worldly tragedy in Ukraine.
Tell me, then, about despair, yours, and I will tell you mine — yes. The exchanges about Nate gave some of us — myself, certainly — the space to sort through our feelings and honor his memory simply by virtue of reminding us we are not alone in our despairs. This, then, is the great gift of Mary Oliver’s poem:
“Whoever you are, no matter how lonely,
the world offers itself to your imagination,
calls to you like the wild geese, harsh and exciting –
+This under-$200 floral dress is adorable. The Great meets Agua Bendita?
+Loving this one-piece (people rave about this exact style) in the dandelion print/color. Such great swim out this season! Also love this scalloped two-piece (the scallop edge always gets me!)
+And this $27 eyelet-trim cover up is a no brainer on top!
+This top makes me feel like summer is just around the corner.
+Cute paper finds: these tennis enclosure cards and this personalized stationery for a little one. (More great paper for children here, and affordable personalized paper for us here.)
+This under-$50 dress reminds me of something by Coco Shop.
+Love this gingham maxi. Would work with bump, too!
By: Jen Shoop
Wedding season is upon us! I have been inundated with requests for wedding guest dresses and have shared options here, here, and here, but today I want to focus on dresses under $150. I am specifically in love with this petal pink, floor-length gown. Gwyneth vibes.
Black Wedding Guest Dresses Under $150.
Formal + Black Tie Wedding Guest Dresses Under $150.
Cocktail Party Wedding Guest Dresses Under $150.
Lots of fabulous statement earrings to pair with these gowns here, and if you need a wrap for a chilly Church, consider the cashmere ones here! For shoes, I am loving these, these, and (for less formal/garden) these or these. I also cannot stop thinking about these jute platform espadrilles.
I treated myself this week to this fun $80 spring top, which brings to mind Love Shack Fancy in a major way and will brighten my wardrobe as we head into spring. A few other spring tops I love at the moment, many under $100:
+I just restocked our stationery shelf with personalized stationery for mini, simple bordered cards with my name and my husband’s name at the top (in black, with black border), and gift enclosure cards.
+Micro’s outfit for mini’s birthday party arrived and j’adore: this cashmere sweater with these pull-on seersucker pants. I don’t know if other boy moms have difficulty getting the right fit in pants — sometimes they are SO balloony and other times they are way too narrow and I can hardly button them. These pants are perfection: they are pull-on but on the slimmer side. I also bought him these shorts in case it turns out to be warmer that day.
+I shared a ton of cute children’s shoes here but wanted to also mention this Cienta-inspired pair for under $20, which come in great colors. A perfect shoe for something like the outfit above — a tad bit dressier than a sneaker, but not so formal that it feels like Sunday best.
+I have these floating bath toy sets in my cart: this for mini, this for micro. I find long afternoon baths are a great way to hit the re-set button if the kids are getting wild or antsy or angsty. A Magpie reader once wrote: “put a fish in water…” with regards to children, and it’s so true. Water is a cure-all. New water toys are even better.
+This ASOS score is in my cart ATM. I just LOVE it. So dramatic and so fun. I am contemplating it for my 12 year anniversary this August!
+Bond girl vibes. I might need that suit. More great swim here.
+Summer brides REJOICE. This little number is absolute perfection, and under $200.
+I found some toddler GG sneaks on sale here! By a total stroke of good fortune, I found a pristine pair on TheRealReal for mini to wear with her birthday dress and I know a few of you have been hunting, too.
+Love the texture of this pendant — on super duper sale, too!
+I’ve mentioned these before, but these bowls are the best for little ones. A perfect size and depth, plus microwavable and dishwasher safe. The handles come in…handy (ha!), too.
Last week, I learned that a close former colleague of mine had died in a freak skiing accident. I was running errands and my former boss called and asked whether I could pull my car over. I’m relieved he did. I sat in my car on a quiet street in Mohican Hills attempting to be polite and consoling in the face of the news, and then he said: “Let me know if you need to talk. I’m holding a space for you,” and a sob involuntarily rose in my throat. I stumbled and sputtered my way through something about what a horrific loss it was, and then I hung up and wept.
I personally hired Nate when he was a few years out of college and he was my right-hand man during my tenure as CIO of a small non-profit focused on building the financial health of low-income teens. He was bright, inexperienced, and impossibly idealistic, as we all were. I remember sitting across from him at Lula Cafe in Logan Square, Chicago, at the final round of the interview process, needling him about how much he wanted the job. He was never without a smile, and that made him difficult to read. He pulled out a small notebook and gestured to a cluster of pages on which he’d kept notes about the position and his thoughts on its requirements. “Yes,” he nodded. “I want this job.” I could see it was true. I was moved by his evident care and seriousness in thinking about the role. Anyone who took the time to transfer thoughts to paper, to document some of his own ideas, with no assurance as to whether he would get the job, was going to be a perfect fit for our scrappy, moonshot organization. I offered him the position on the spot.
I have thought about that afternoon, and especially the elegant presence of those notes in his notebook, many times over the past week. We shared countless other hilarious and frustrating and wonderful memories together working to build a smartphone application designed to promote the saving habits of high school students, but I think mainly of that exchange, of the way I thought to myself: “This is a person I want to work closely with.” He was a joy in the office: upbeat, determined, curious, creative, funny. We approached problems differently, and I learned a lot about myself because of the delta between us. He was contemplative and thorough and I was intuition-driven and immediate. I would ply him with false claims of urgency, and, ever the good sport, he would comply. On the occasions he wouldn’t, I learned the most. “But why do we need it done this way?” he would ask, and I would nod my head as if divining a truth that hadn’t yet materialized, and then we’d figure out a different path forward together. It was exciting to work with him. I have managed many young staff members in my time but never someone who knew so well when and how to push back in a productive way — in a way that felt committed to the cause rather than retributive or gainful or oppositional for the sake of being oppositional. And that was Nate: mission-driven, inquisitive in all the right ways, a man for others.
I have returned to the specifics of my memories of Nate with urgency the past week, straining to remember even what his handwriting looked like, because I otherwise have been battling tremendous regret that I did not keep in better touch with him the last few years, and I am put off by my own selfishness in this regard. His death is not about me. His death is a loss, acute and caustic. He was bright and thought-filled and passionate and I know there are many friends and family members who are grieving profoundly at this very moment. I speculated elsewhere on the troubling concept that grief can have uses. I absolutely riot against that notion today.
Instead:
Nate, you are remembered. I write your name to hold a space for you.
