Last week, I laughed out loud at this Instagram post —
Who can relate? Landon’s office looks out onto our cul de sac, and he’s always clocking the comings and goings of neighbors and their guests, and reporting to me on it. I’m like a moth to a flame when I catch sight of an interesting bird, or animal (there is a fox who frequently traipses through our backyard!) outside my window, too.
But the post also made me wonder:
What else has surprised me about getting older?
A few that spring to mind:
+How little time I actually have with friends and family — it’s not uncommon to go months without seeing them;
+That I now often have “a perspective” on things rooted in real, lived experience rather than conjecture and inherited wisdom;
+How rarely I need an outfit that “takes me from day to night” — I’ve always found a way to change?;
+How difficult it is to see my parents get older;
+That a lot of the time, my mood is dictated by lack of sleep — as simple as that;
+How much I enjoy bird-watching;
+How easy it is to injure myself by doing next to nothing at all (I’m thinking specifically of the many times I’ve tweaked my back by handing my children snacks in the back seat);
+That everything has a price — there truly is no free lunch, and any choice I make seems to be displacing something else;
+How much I value comfort, and ease — rounding up when paying for parking, splurging on better seats/accommodations, saying “no” to avoid feeling harried;
+How unglamorous entrepreneurship is;
+That bad things happen to good people, and vice versa, and it can really warp your worldview unless you keep searching for slivers of joy;
+How fast it all goes
And on the flipside, a few things that turned out exactly as I’d been told, or otherwise imagined —
+That motherhood is magic, and that there is absolutely nothing like holding your babies, even when they are 5 and 7 (and, I predict, 25 and 27, and 45 and 47…);
+That hard work pays off;
+That love is always the point.
What about you?
Post-Scripts.
+It’s just that — life is too short.
+Things I have learned from my mother.
+On remembering myself in motherhood.
Shopping Break.
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+Outfit details in photo at top here.
+Lake recently released their fabulous Relax set in iconic black. I had to have it! I think this might be what I get my bestie for Christmas. She basically only wears black (New Yorker). I also just bought my MIL this pair of classic jammies as a surprise — she’ll be staying with our children while we’re out of the country and I’m going to leave them all boxed up on her bed!
+Two great pairs of chocolate brown suede boots to contemplate: these, $250 (I got them in the chocolate brown suede and they are PERFECT — very comfortable, easy to walk in, and the ambient color story), and these (recently launched at Loeffler Randall — fun new shape for them).
+OMG this tweedy waistcoat! (Under $100.)
+SoldOutNYC just launched a fine-gauge cashmere turtleneck and I’m drooling. I LOVE this brand’s wardrobe basics. I have their tees in basically every color, most of their tank styles, and of course their Everything Shirts are divine (I own in three colors). You can get 15% off with code JEN15.
+For a big statement this holiday season, you must check out Eleanor Leftwich’s latest collection. LOVE all the feathered pieces, especially this top and these pants.
+I have been seeing these chic new toothbrushes all over the place lately. What’s your favorite toothbrush? I have a tie between these Swiss Curaprox ones and these Cocofloss ones. Very similar! Long live the soft bristle! While we’re talking dental care, has anyone tried the Japanese Hydroxyapatite toothpaste I mentioned a few weeks back?! Mr. Magpie and I are obsessed.
+I was delighted by how many of you ordered this $200 knit coat after I shared. I snagged it in the chocolate brown, and they are now offering us 15% off with code ZS-JENS15.
+Hyper niche, but Lan and I have smoothies most mornings for breakfast, and nothing sparks early morning joy like having the right vessel for a smoothie. We LOVE these heavy, oversized tumblers from Half Past Seven, and we sip out of these wide glass straws. An elite drinking experience, trust me. If you are also a smoothie enthusiast, treat yourself — you can buy the tumblers individually! It will bring you joy.
+Little reminder that these brown wide leg jeans are only $28 and nail the Veronica Beard vibe.
+I absolutely love a henley. It’s such a sexy neckline but it can also look polished in a nice knit.
+Dorsey’s new cocktail rings are pretty epic.
+Already thinking ahead to holiday events — picked up this dress for my daughter and this fair isle from Danrie for my son! I’ve mentioned this boutique in the past — they have such a great curation of European and American brands. J’adore! They offered us 15% off with code JENS.
I chuckled at that statement about looking out the windows! Right above my kitchen sink is a window that looks out into the street and I now think, what did I do without a window above my sink before?!
What has surprised me about getting older — is how much I come back to this statement: “If it’s not an absolute yes, then it’s a no”.
I LOVE that sentiment and have been thinking about it a lot lately…really good at separating wheat from chaff.
xxx
Turned 40 last week! Comfort is key. Saying no without guilt feels great. Boundaries are easier to establish. FOMO is a thing of the past. Early to bed and early to rise is makes a woman healthy, wealthy and wise! Motherhood is every emotion heightened. It’s incredible. Investing is a really good thing. Reading, gardening, walking and many of the other “old lady” hobbies are wonderful ways to pass the time and relax. Dining out isn’t what it used to be. I could go on!
Found myself nodding along to all of these — “saying no without guilt…!” Hoping to one day crest that mountain!
On boundaries — yes! This has been an ongoing area of learning for me but one reminder I tell myself is that “boundaries are a form of love” — whether it’s to my child, myself, others, etc.
I’m 38 and surprised by how young I feel. I used to think 40 was old!
100% agree with this!
How often I check the weather! Sometimes I think it’s bc I don’t really do social media anymore but I still have the urge/habit to check something on my phone. But I am always genuinely concerned about the weather. I live in fear of being cold! Also, how much the conversation has already turned to friends discussing their ailments. We’re only in our 40s! But also still in the young kid years so pretty much always ailing during the school year…if not aches and pains, then definitely a cold!
Yes, me too! I check it constantly! My kids model it, too – they’re always asking Siri what the temp is outside 🙂
The sock thing…didn’t expect my 40s to mean all my socks were suddenly wrong. Haha! But seriously and much more happily, two things spring to mind – I have a strong sense of perspective and can both sit in hard, all-consuming things and know they won’t be hard forever, and I am wildly, surprisingly competent in some areas.
Wow – love these. Good on us 🙂
These all ring true! It feels like my husband and I have both developed this sudden, profound appreciation for nature. He asked me yesterday if I wanted to go for a ride to just “look at trees”. (Football was on!)
Also a surprise— everyone I know in my age group reevaluating their relationship to alcohol. Our social gatherings are….evolving. It’s interesting. Change is good.
OMG – a drive “just to look at trees.” So sweet and I want to do this right now!
xx