Could you live in the quiet, in the removed, in the pale mists of mountains or the golden-green undulation of countryside? Increasingly, I think I could. It’s not practical now with the children ensconced in school and my parents five minutes down the road. But later, maybe, yes. Funny: Landon and I used to talk about moving back to New York City in our “open door years” (a coinage I plucked from Magpie readers, who use it as a considerable improvement on the passe “empty nest years”). The pedestrian lifestyle! The culture, the restaurants, the energy! And none of it compromised by the complexities of folding strollers to get down subway stairs or getting stuck in parade routes while rushing to a meeting, or to school.
Now I imagine my future self, the silver version of me, and I wonder if she wouldn’t rather the bare foot on dew-grass in the morning. If she’d not fall madly love with the seclusion of it. We talked about this while driving through the Virginia countryside that stretched between Charlottesville and Middleburg, all charming stone and red storybook stable and vulpes vulpes energy. As the fields spun by, I imagined myself waking up somewhere out there and experiencing that soul-dissolving feeling, where your entire self shrinks to the size of a pin-head as you look around at a vast field or stand at the toe of a craggy peak. What calls to me most profoundly: the silence. Not a sound — not a car engine, not a leaf blower, those determinedly boisterous participants in my current suburban soundscape.
Or rather, sound, but just nature’s symphonies.
But then I wouldn’t have these trees outside my window. Or maybe I would. All I know is that it feels vital to my mind, to my craft, to have this creative literacy with branch and bark on a daily basis.
But there are seasons yet.
Do you ever feel that you could live 1000 lives and be happy with them?
What does that mean? Does it suggest unfocus or open-mindedness?
Because I could imagine myself very happily in a rustic Virginia kitchen with four dogs, on the Eastern Shore with birding binoculars and an eye on the water-weather, among the rustling Aspens somewhere in Colorado. Or in New York City, or in a leafy cottage somewhere upstate, or on a lake somewhere out West. Or, hell, in Paris, in San Sebastian, in Tuscany. In London, in Calistoga, in Middleburg. On Cranberry Lake. In the Blue Ridge. Right where I am, right now, too.
Maybe these are just the story-starts inside of me, seeking their way out. A crackling creative energy.
Perhaps this next chapter of creative work I feel myself embarking on will enable the kind of alternity-living I’m spitballing with here: invitations to write, opportunities to imagine what it feels like to wake up to a storm coming in across the epilimnion of the lake.
If it comes, let it; if it goes, let it —
Post-script.
Excerpt from Mary Oliver’s gorgeous poem “Humpbacks”:
“I know a captain who has seen them
playing with seaweed, swimming
through the green islands, tossing
the slippery branches into the air.
I know a whale that will come to the boat whenever
she can, and nudge it gently along the bow
with her long flipper.
I know several lives worth living.
+
Listen, whatever it is you try
to do with your life, nothing will ever dazzle you
like the dreams of your body,
its spirit
longing to fly while the dead-weight bones
toss their dark mane and hurry
back into the fields of glittering fire
where everything,
even the great whale,
throbs with song.”
Shopping Break.
+It’s sweatpant jeans season!!!! These are just so comfortable and chic. Style with a big oversized white button down for the ultimate pulled-together-but-still-super-comfortable look. (While you’re there, check out the sale section — barrel leg utility pants and straight-legs in a great everyday wash for 30% off!)
+Somehow missed this gorgeous cable knit cashmere sweater among J. Crew’s new arrivals. GORGEOUS.
+Jane Win just restocked their gorgeous dogwood pendant, meant to symbolize joy! Easy to blend in with other everyday pieces and you can have it engraved, too! These pieces are so special. I often wear my “courage” pendant when I need a little talisman! A great gift, too.
+LOVE the silhouette on this copper velvet dress.
+20% off the coziest slippers this weekend! I got a pair! They also have a few cute holiday giftables, like this set or these. Such a great stocking stuffer / favorite things type gift. My mom put a pair in each of our stockings last year and it was kind of my favorite? I also love when she gives us Slip hair ties. My sister and I joke we wait all year for those :). Which — by the way, Mom — I found cute little giftable sets of Slip scrunchies for 40% off here and here! I picked up a few of those to give as gifts to babysitters this year!
+Veronica Beard becomes its best self in the colder months. I love their latest arrivals, especially their gorgeous Dash bag in the suede options (a Savette vibe for like 1/4th the price), this plaid wool scarf coat, and this eye-catching foulard-print blouse. If you’re going out West this season, you’ll be drooling over this. Swoon!
+This is basically my dream boot. I love the silhouette, the rich suede OR croc options, and people say the insoles are nice and plush / they offer good arch support. Deeply chic and ultra-versatile — a classic. You can buy once and wear for decades. I also like their Valentinas for maxi-length dresses and wide-leg pants — I will never part ways with a pointed toe!
+If you love my La Double J fringe scarf but want something a little less spendy, I found the BEST option here. The colors are amazing!
+Gorgeous knit dress for work or evening. Comes in a petite, too! I love it in the navy with a smart flat or tall boot and the aforementioned statement scarf.
+Last day to get THE magic pants on sale for 20% off!
+One of my friends with amazing, amazing hair (like, looks like Julia Amory’s hair) was just raving about this leave-in conditioner. I ordered it immediately! Comes in a mini size if you want to trial it. Apparently their detox shampoo is their bestseller, though — I’m intrigued by this because in the winter months, a hair scrub seems too drying, but every now and then, I want a good and thorough reset/cleanse in the cold months.
+Our fresh and crisp new autumn sheets (the piping! feels like hotel bedding! just a delight!) and “mosaic comforter” — the weight is perfect for right now.
+I often get questions about whether I have a code for Helix mattresses – I do not BUT they are 20% off again, and this is their bestselling style. (This is the one we have, but you can take a quiz to find out the best one for you on their site.) A high-quality mattress is the best investment in a good night of sleep! My dad’s back has been bothering him and I’ve been begging him to buy a new mattress from here to help! They also have cooling mattress toppers and cooling memory foam pillows!!! Truly a dream-come-true for perimenopausal woman, and all 20% off. Upgrade!!!
+Although I am going to double down on the cooling thread. I’m buying Landon (and myself, hehe) the Eight Sleep system for Christmas. A doctor friend of mine swears by this and I polled Magpies on Insta and so many said it was a gamechanger.
+Reminder that the BEST undereye product is 25% off! Magic on dark undereye circles, especially paired with the GOAT concealer.
+Cute look for less for my Call It By Your Name quilted bandana pouch! This duffle from the same collection is fun too.
Looking Ahead…
In case you’re a fellow anticipator like me (i.e., opposite of a procrastinator), some great early holiday finds here. How fun is this brass bow garland?! I got these wicker trees for myself. At time of writing, everything is slightly discounted!
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