Motherhood
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Weekend Vibes: Motherhood Milestones.

By: Jen Shoop
"You can't do it, you can't do it, and then, suddenly, you can."

My Latest Snag: Ancient Greek Eleftheria Sandals.

I did end up ordering the Ancient Greek Eleftheria sandals — too chic to resist! I snagged them in neutral but I also adore them in black. I just wear so little black in the summer. Glad to have a slightly dressier option on hand that will go with everything.

If you like the look but not the price tag, you might consider Reformation’s Ludo style or Schutz’s Mariah.

This Week’s Bestsellers.

PSA: The best-selling Anthro Somerset dress below is 20% off with code ANTHROLTK20.

01. MAREA SHIRTDRESS // 02. NUXE DEODORANT // 03. BEST AMAZON SLEEPING PILLOWS // 04. LAKE SEERSUCKER NIGHTGOWN // 05. J. CREW VINTAGE RIB TANK // 06. SKIMS TRIANGLE BRA // 07. ZARA EMBROIDERED SHORTS // 08. TUCKERNUCK DRESS // 09. J. CREW PLEATED DENIM SHORTS // 10. ANTHRO SOMERSET DRESS (20% OFF WITH CODE ANTHROLTK20) // 11. & OTHER STORIES BLOUSE // 12. J. CREW EMILIE CARDIGAN

Weekend Musings:

I absolutely loved this post on Instagram:

It immediately drew me back to sitting in the living room of my Chicago home maybe eight or nine days after delivering my daughter via c-section. It was still difficult to make my way up and down the stairs and so I’d bring everything I’d need down in the mornings and set up shop for the day. A girlfriend of mine stopped by with her baby, who was almost exactly one month older than Emory. I remember being mystified by her agility and poise when she materialized on my doorstep, baby in infant carseat, looking…normal. Like herself. I felt puffy, undone, saggy and full at once. I was an emotional wreck, crying in the shower and weeping over my baby. And it was unfathomable that I might drive somewhere by myself with my baby. I still hadn’t figured out how the infant car seat clipped into the base, could barely lift it given the incision, and was in that phase of constant fluttering worry over every noise and squeak my daughter emitted. What if Emory cried in the car? What if I had to nurse her right then and there in public? I was still getting the hang of breastfeeding and could barely do it alone, without an audience. I didn’t trust that I would figure out how to put on the nursing cover and feed her discreetly, or get her to feed at all. These thoughts came whizzing through my mind like a freight train. I stood in awe of my friend as I simultaneously felt my heart sink, seeing myself as inferior, ill-equipped. Why was this easier for her?

I didn’t know then that it was just a matter of time. That a month, in newborn days, is something like dog years to human ones: you almost can’t believe how much you can change and accomplish in the span of a week. Infinitesimal transformations take place every minute of every day as you become a mother. Your baby is changing in front of you, outgrowing clothes overnight, picking up new awarenesses and abilities, and you are so fixated on accommodating these evolutions that you do not realize that you, too, are in metamorphosis. You can’t figure out how to breastfeed, she won’t latch, and then — suddenly — she will. Or she won’t, and you figure out another path forward. You can’t swaddle her tightly enough, and her tiny arms spring out unbidden, and for days on end, she startles herself awake — and then, suddenly, you get the hang of it.

There are so many moments of motherhood where I have felt I am bouncing nervously at the edge of a high diving board. How am I ever going to get two children to a birthday party on time by myself, and then extricate them without meltdowns when it’s time to go? How can I possibly make it through this day with my newly-crawling baby? Will the tantrums ever stop? I don’t know how to get my child to sleep!

You can’t, you can’t, you can’t — and then you can.

I wish I had known this better at the start. That the parts of motherhood that feel impossible eventually fade into the everyday humdrum of rearing children. That the mountains turn out to be molehills. That you can and will do it.

Sending love to any mother — at any stage of matrescence — who is standing on the high dive right now. You can’t, you can’t, you can’t — and then you can.

Shopping Break.

+A bit of a departure from my preferred silhouette, but think I’m going to order this striped knit mini.

+Currently coveting this mini Bottega bag. I love the idea of a tiny bag like this to just carry essentials when heading out for the evening…or for a quick midday errand sans children.

+These look just like my Le Specs Air Hearts (which I own in three colors!), but cost $15.

+On-trend crochet top from J. Crew!

+Loving these La Double J-esque trousers (under $75).

+OK now THIS is chic lounge. They are marketing it as the perfect travel day outfit and I can’t disagree.

+My sister wore this black dress to my birthday dinner and looked SO FABULOUS in it. Sometimes you just can’t beat the chicness of an LBD. Kind of digging off the shoulder in general right now. Anyhow, she was RAVING about this brand, Matteau, and now I’m hunting all over for some good sale pieces from the label. Kind of loving this black mini?

+Summer must have. If I’m going strapless, I’m wearing these. Hate a strapless bra. I even wear these under swimsuits and they work just fine. I find them necessary to pair with my fav Hunza G.

+How good is this $60 woven ottoman?

+Lots of great sale finds at Lululemon, including this white tank, available in nearly all sizes.

+If you’ve followed for awhile, you know how much I adore / can’t live without my Cocofloss. I just saw they now have toothbrushes, too, designed by dentists. Pricey but I’m curious, as I didn’t think I would ever get excited about floss, but then their floss changed my life. Not joking! It grabs everything, like velcro, and I like the flavors. Floss has been so important to me during my Invisalign journey! Fellow Invisaligners will know what I’m talking about, but your teeth are shifting around so much, you’re constantly finding new nooks and crannies that never used to have food stuck in them.

+Fun summer dress on sale at Rhode. Love all the details.

+Obsessed with the seashell detail on this shift.

+Thinking ahead to fall — this Staud Wells dress (I own in pink, currently on sale, and it is SO GOOD) comes in such a chic navy print. I feel like this would be great for a fall affair with a little cardi over top.

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8 thoughts on “Weekend Vibes: Motherhood Milestones.

  1. Thank you for sharing. It gave me chills. It’s so true. It feels unsurmountable…and yet, here we are, doing the thing…This is why (in your words!) motherhood is a surfeit.

    Onto the frivolous — what bra are we wearing with nap dresses?!

    1. Yes, amen! The insurmountable bits that we somehow manage to do anyway, and, eventually, they fade into the easy fabric of motherhood. Wow!

      I go bra-less or wear Nippies with the nap dresses, but have heard other Magpies like the Skims bralettes with some of the silhouettes —

      https://bit.ly/43iNL5d

      xx

  2. My kids are older so I haven’t thought about this for awhile but I remember the terrible sleepless nights with my infant daughter and thinking, “I will never again be able to lay in my bed and watch Sex and the City reruns again.” Now I lay in bed with my nearly adult daughters and watch SATC reruns. And just like that – they grow up. Hang in there mamas of littles!

    1. !! I love the full circle-ness of this particular memory. So amazing! Wow. Thanks for this promising reminder!

      xx

  3. I’ve been using the Cocofloss toothbrushes for several years and REALLY love them. I used to be a “hard” toothbrush gal, but tried these and I’m a big fan now of soft toothbrushes. They are easier on the teeth and gums and get in many areas due to their flexibility. I originally found them for my handicapped son because we have a hard time getting into his mouth to brush. These brushes have helped him too.
    Everything I’ve tried from Cocofloss is very good. They do have periodic sales. Yes, the toothbrushes are pricey, but healthy teeth are valuable! Dental work is way more expensive than these brushes.
    I must admit that I tried these toothbrushes from Amazon and they are very similar to the Cocofloss brand for a much better price. However I still purchase the Cocofloss ones.

    https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B005LB75NI/ref=ppx_yo_dt_b_search_asin_title?ie=UTF8&psc=1

    1. Hi Cynthia! Thanks for chiming in! I did order these and we are also loving them. Agree that the soft bristles are so much better for gums/teeth — at least that’s what my dentists and hygienists say! I think the Cocofloss ones are really similar to the Swiss Curaprox ones we also love, but the Curaprox are less expensive, so will probably switch back to those after we finish the set of four we bought. Thanks for chiming in here!

      https://amzn.to/3D5Otbn

      xx

  4. I fell in love with Cocofloss based on your recommendation! Would love to know your thoughts on their toothbrush if you try it.

    1. Isn’t it THE BEST? I’ll never go back. I did order the toothbrushes and REALLY like them. As I mentioned to Cynthia above, my dentists/hygienists have been recommending soft bristle toothbrushes for awhile as they are gentler on teeth/gums and don’t scrape the enamel, etc. I will say I find them very, very similar to Swiss Curaprox toothbrushes, which we’ve used and loved for years, but the Curaprox ones are even less expensive.

      https://amzn.to/3D5Otbn

      I also like the hexagonal shape of the Curaprox brushes, which makes them easier to angle?

      xx

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