Weekend Vibes

Weekend Vibes, Edition No. 85: What Do You Do Just for You?

By: Jen Shoop

My Latest Snag: The Goyard-Esque Laptop Case.

You might have seen this if you follow me on my new @thefashionmagpie Instagram account, but I recently pounced on a Goyard dupe for my laptop.  I’m not huge on lookalikes/faux bags, but this one got good reviews and, every now and then, I just think: “I like this and I’m going to get it.”  And so I did.  $38, free returns, no regrets.  I’m now realizing it could swap in for an oversized clutch if I’m so inclined.  Whee!  Now if I can only convince my girl Inslee to hand paint some letters on the top…which reminds me: her new desktop calendars are now live and they are gooooood, especially for the bibliophiles among us.

The Fashion Magpie Goyard Laptop Case 1 The Fashion Magpie Goyard Laptop Case 2 The Fashion Magpie Goyard Laptop Case 3


You’re Sooooo Popular: The Dreamy Jogger.

The most popular items on Le Blog this week:

+The name of these joggers is apt, because they truly are the stuff of dreams.

+This striped shirtdress is now on sale and very on-trend.  #guccivibes

+A well-reviewed bodysuit — perfect for fall layering.

+An elegant pleated midi.

+My secret to keeping my sweaters clean and nicely scented in the winter.  (And saving a fortune on dry cleaning.)

+I love these shelf dividers.  It’s boring, but it’s my life.  More of my favorite organizational products here.

+Monogrammed jewelry cases FTW!

#Turbothot: What Do You Do Just for You?

I was flattered that Inslee mentioned in an Instastory that part of her inspiration for her new book-centric desk calendar was joining my book club.  She mentioned that it was something she did “just for her” — not for her business, not for her baby, not for anyone else or any other purpose.  I loved that.  It led me to wonder: what do I do just for me?  If you think about it, so much of our everyday lives is consumed by the needs and wishes and influences of others, whether we are mothers or not, and even in the context of seemingly innocuous things that we don’t necessarily mind, like what to make for dinner (but what does Mr. Magpie want?), or where to grab lunch (but Julie is gluten-free!), or when to call our parents (but mom will be eating dinner now…) or whether we can make it to a playdate on time (but mini is still sleeping!)  This isn’t a bad thing, of course.  Quite the opposite: I aspire to live my life as a woman for others, though I know I fall well short in that category.  (My legacy goals are more realistic.)  And there is grand virtue in considerateness, empathy, generosity of spirit, selflessness.


We don’t need to be martyrs about it either.  Sometimes we owe it to ourselves to be — well, how should I put it?  I hate the negative implications of the word “selfish” or “self-centered.”  I suppose I mean to say that sometimes we need to show ourselves some love, some quiet freedom, some permissiveness, even in the narrowest of ways.   The other day, for example, I realized that every time I got up to run to the bathroom or change the laundry or grab something out of the other room, I felt compelled to tell Mr. Magpie.  I don’t know how long I’ve been doing this, running this ongoing commentary about my comings and goings.  I don’t know whether it registers on him.  But I know why I do it: so that he’s not left with mini for more than a few minutes wondering where I’ve gone.  I do it to reassure him I’ll be back to co-parent with him presently.  I do it as a courtesy.  But — it was over the top.  Sometimes homegirl just needs to run into the bathroom to pluck a stray eyebrow hair or grab a Kindle or take a minute to stand in silence in the bedroom behind a closed door after a battle of the wills with a toddler.  And none of these things need to be annotated.

And so, the other day, I left the living room unexplained.  And returned promptly.  And everything was as it was.

It was small, petty — and just for me.

Other things I do just for me:

+Get a weekly manicure, without fail, and often at the end of the last “working” day of my week, when I have the nanny for a final hour and have wrapped up work on the blog.

+Buy a bag of gummy candies at “It’s Sugar” (<<actual name of the store; horrible) down the street and eat them until I make myself sick.

+Decide to take the longer circuit on my midday walk with Tilly so I can listen to a bit more of whatever podcast I’m into at the moment.  (Right now, NPR’s new season of Serial.  I have mixed reviews on it at this point, but I’m pot-committed.  Next up: Last Seen, which has gotten insane reviews — all about the true story of a major art heist.)

+Go to bed early so I can read under the covers, alone.

+Buy oatmilk (Oatly is SO GOOD) and a box of cereal.  Mr. Magpie hates both of these things, so it’s all me, baby.  Alarmingly, I find myself drawn to “old person” cereals like Basic 4 (it is so so so good though), but I used to be a Special K Red Berries girl.

+Buy an afternoon soy milk latte.  It takes five minutes to walk to a good coffee shop around the corner, and it’s a total and unnecessary extravagance,  but my oh my does it make me happy.

+Close the door to the bathroom before bed so I can take my time washing my face, staring at my pores, plucking more stray eyebrows, and layering on all the lotions and oils a girl could ever want without feeling rushed or watched.

+Organize my desk and side table drawers using these. No one else ever goes into these drawers but me, and it brings me joy to find them tidy.

+Turn down my sheets before I get into them.  I remove the decorative pillows and shams, tighten the sheets and spray them with crease release when needed, and fold back the duvet.  It is like heaven to get into a prepped bed like this and I can’t explain why.

+Splurge on hand sanitizer with a better scent than the run-of-the-mill Purell at Duane Reade.  No one cares but me, but yes — it brings me joy.  I’ve also heard good things about this brand.

What do you do just for you?

#Shopaholic: The Balloon-Sleeved Sweater.

+Ordering this.  Usually this brand’s sweaters are far more expensive — and the color and shape are SO right now!

+Love this dress in the alphabet print!

+WOW.  The Loveliest Company has some insane new monogram designs that I almost want to buy and frame!  Wouldn’t that be kind of cool?

+Dying over Tory Burch’s Lee Radziwill bag, a new and elegant throwback shape. #newbagwhodis

+Should have added this affordable find to my roundup of what to wear to Thanksgiving (scroll to post-scripts).  Affordable and super flattering — and love the cranberry red!

+Love the Western vibes of this blouse.

+A chic dog bowl!

+I have a pearl encrusted sweater I bought at Zara last year that fetched me more compliments than the remainder of my wardrobe combined.  H&M has a chic variation on this theme on offer for only $40!


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23 thoughts on “Weekend Vibes, Edition No. 85: What Do You Do Just for You?

  1. I am SO with you on a few of these just-for-you things: the guilty pleasure of candy (for me, I sometimes relish going to Whole Foods by myself so I can get a little bit of [maybe healthyish?] candy!), afternoon lattes, and going to bed early to read. I’ve been wanting to try oat milk and think I’ll give Oatly a whirl next time I’m at WFM!

    Other things I do just for myself: write in my journal (though I don’t do it nearly as frequently as I’d like), keep secret Pinterest boards, and cut up magazines while listening to music. The last item on that mini list reminds me of my younger years in the best of ways.

    I am super intrigued by the Demylee x J.Crew collab — did you end up getting that sweater? I need to curb my shopping a bit this month, at least in that category (lots of party attire to buy, not to mention holiday gifts!) but this balloon-sleeve sweater has me really tempted.

    1. Ooh, I like the idea of secret Pinterest boards. That’s a good one! A private space to plan for future weddings / jobs / homes / babies / trips / parties / etc. So good!

      I love my Demylee sweater! The quality is incredible. I wore the marigold one on Halloween and got so many compliments on it! xo

  2. Chiming in a few days late — I, too, love “old person” cereals!! Basic 4 is fantastic. I recently tried Fiber One because it has no added sugars. It’s actually pretty good!

    In response to your post from last Friday, I’d also like to say thanks for writing the blog. It’s the only one I read, and I look forward to it daily. I found it shortly after our baby was born, and your Mini Magpie series accompanied me through many witching hours. (And your baby gear reviews are my gold standard!) Thanks for creating a nice space for thinking and reflecting and online shopping.

    1. Oh man, thank you so much for the compliments. You are so kind. I’m glad we’ve found one another and that you approve of my (often excruciatingly detailed) evaluations of all things mini. xoxo

  3. Oh my gosh, I find myself doing the same commentary things about my comings and goings with my husband! And you’re right – I think it’s to assure him that I’m not abandoning him with the care of our toddler for too long, which is totally silly. I need to be more conscious of it and work on breaking the habit…

    I also find that my nighttime skincare routine is a lovely way to treat myself at the end of the day. About six months after having our baby I got super into that little part of the day because it allowed me to take a few minutes, and a few breaths, and feel like I was taking care of myself. I’ll also take an indulgent bath at night sometimes and listen to a podcast, light some candles, and try to really take my time with it.

    When I can, I like to wake up super early and sit downstairs with my morning coffee and a book and just enjoy a few minutes of peace to myself. Granted, that time often ends up getting cut much shorter than I would like, but it still feels nice to do. 🙂

    1. OMG, the nightly baths (which podcasts?!) and morning reading sessions sound delicious. Going to try both of these in the coming weeks for a change of pace. xoxo

  4. Also, what I do just for me; announce I’m baking cookies as a guise for eating most of the dough in spoonfuls of “testers” before it ends up in the oven 🙂

  5. Hi- stopping in after re-discovering you from Inslee (but have popped in time to time from Mackenzie’s links!) and felt like I found a home here! I’ve loved reading your last few posts (and have been chewing on the idea of ‘staying interesting’ from a few posts back for a few days now…it expressed so many feelings/thoughts I’ve had about womanhood) Anyway just wanted to say that I’m so happy I found you! Excited to follow along xx

    1. Aw – Katherine! I’m so glad you’ve rediscovered and have found a home here. That makes me so happy to hear. Thanks for reading! xo

  6. I was actually thinking about this today, as apparently it’s “Treat Yo Self Day”?? I was talking about it with a coworker yesterday who asked about my weekend plans, and I said, “well, I don’t have kids, etc., so I feel like every day for me is Treat Yo Self Day?” But, thinking about it some more, there are definitely things I hold back on, and thought of a few simple things I could indulge in. Today, that’s a glass of Rose in the afternoon 🙂 We shouldn’t need a made-up “holiday” to do more of this, though! Perhaps I should order some Molton Brown shower gel…hmm…

    1. Absolutely! And having kids isn’t the only reason why people aren’t self-indulgent, either! Glad you are treating yourself today. xo

  7. I loved this so much and it resonated in me for some time. I’ve been in the last stretch of my bar exam for what feels like entire 2018 and I need these things that bring me joy – just for myself to keep up the spirits! May it be the perfect capuccino I got at the cafe down the street, or the flowers I buy myself every week to put on my desk while studying.

    these small things are everything on some days.

    1. Yes! Yes! So glad to read this. The littlest things indeed. Good luck with your studies! I know it’s brutal…!

  8. Good morning! Love the blog but I encourage you to rethink about how you used the word “co-parent.” It usually refers to parents that do not live together or are not in a romantic relationship. You are usually so precise with your words, which is one reason why I read the blog every day!

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