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Keats once described the world as “a vale of soul-making.” It’s so true – even the missteps are correct in this long project to find out who we are, to see what’s inside. And when I think of life in this way, as a process of whittling away what isn’t, it becomes much easier to cut through the noise. This comes naturally to children, of course, this tuning out of the ancillary. The other day at lunch, my son said: “My favorite things are Legos, playing outside, and doing science experiments.” It was so simple to him: as clear as creek-water. He could have days and days with only these three pastimes to fill them and feel happy. (By the way, “doing science experiments” is shorthand for “spending time with Dad” — my husband has been making his way through this experiment book with the kids and they absolutely love it.) I asked my son what he thought Mr. Magpie’s favorite things were, and my son said: “Cooking and growing things in the garden.” And for me: “Being sweet and writing.” (Ha! From the mouth of babes! Being sweet?! As if this is a primary hobby in life?)
But, you know, how clearly our children see things: how we spend our days is how we spend our lives, and he sees my husband and I investing the bulk of our spare time in these beloved pursuits week in and week out. Not bad, I think. I’d be happy to be remembered as “someone sweet who also wrote.”
I wonder how you, or your children, would categorize the way you voluntarily spend your time? If you could just list three things you focus on outside of work and familial obligations? What are they?
I hope you might take a minute to share them in their idiosyncratic glory in the comments below.
And in closing, a little reminder that you are not meant to live your life like others; you are meant to live your life like yourself.
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P.S. Above: me in my new family room mirror from Fleur Home (look for less with this). My entire outfit here.
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A little Sunday shopping poetry…
PATOU JACKET (LOOK FOR LESS HERE AND HERE) // LARROUDE ARI PLATFORMS // 3.1 PHILLIP LIM SOLEIL BAG (SAMPLE SALE PRICE!) // VELVET BRYLIES // DR. DIAMOND METACINE PLASMA // YVES DURIF VENTED BRUSH // TRASK TOOTHBRUSH
Eyeing these velvet Larroude platforms for the holiday season — remind me of the Pradas! // Such a gorgeous statement jacket from new-to-me label Patou. // Velvet Brylie restock! These do sell through — last fall, they were difficult to find! // 3.1 Philip Lim is running a sample sale and you need to know about their bucket bags! Love this small size in chocolate, coffee, or lipstick red, or the larger size in the green color — the latter reminds me of my Mansur but currently less than 1/2 the price. // Dr. Diamond Metacine is offering a free discovery size product with the purchase of any full-sized item. A perfect time to buy the plasma and test out the emulsion with it. I really loved the plasma — went through two bottles of it. It does shrink your pores! // Lake Pajamas released their relax set in chic black!! We’ve all been waiting. // We’ve also all been buying this cult following vented brush. So many of you RAVE about this! // A very chic toothbrush. // A lot of fashion writers have been waxing poetic about the brand TWP. Refined, quiet luxury pieces. This top looks like an elevated version of the Tuckernuck one we all love.
I was telling my daughter (age 4) about a work training I facilitated a few weeks ago. I asked her what she thought I trained people to do. “Probably how to be cozy or making better art,” she said. In reality I’m a nonprofit fundraiser by day so this couldn’t be further from what the training was on. But after school and on weekends, we spend a lot of side-by-side time doing creative projects. I felt really seen in her reflection of what I might teach others how to do. That she sees me as a person; not just my job.