Musings + Essays
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How Do You Reset for the Week?

By: Jen Shoop

Mr. Magpie has gotten into a habit of getting everything he needs for the morning routine ready the night before. He’ll lay out the children’s plates and cups, the cereal canister, coffee-making gear, blender for the smoothie. He’ll even prep the fruit so all he has to do is portion it out in the morning. I have not yet made the leap to this level of preparation, but I can see the payoff from afar: the mornings run far more smoothly and the children are ready much earlier on the days he gets up with them. (We trade off on the morning routine responsibility: two days on, two days off. Whoever is on an “off day” will sleep in a bit and then drive the kids to school, which in turns enables the “on” parent to dive straight into exercise, or relax for a bit, before the workday begins.) Mr. Magpie has also programmed our garage door to open at 7:40 a.m. each morning, and has the car automatically start at the same time, so it’s warm when we get in. He is a true engineer, always looking for efficiencies. (Why go through the same steps every day if there’s a way to automate or streamline?) These thoughts would literally never occur to me as a born and bred humanities gal. I’m out with the lanterns, looking for the stories in the schedule.

I was thinking about this more generally, and thought– maybe I’m not going to be as efficient as Landon on a daily basis, but could I do a few things on Sunday that might help me find more ease in my week? I don’t feel I’m sufficiently strategic about this, as Mondays can feel like a breathless catch-up session as I tackle emails, admin, chores I’ve put on hold over the weekend. Then I come up for air at 1 in the afternoon and have that discomfiting feeling that my day has not yet started, and it’s about to end, as I’ll be heading off to pick up the kids in an hour and a half. When I experience this, I remind myself: “This, too, is the job.” Meaning — all the household admin, all the ordering of uniforms and gifts and shoes the next size up, all the responding to invitations and filing of medical forms and scheduling of appointments, all the laundry and switching of sheets — are part of the job. They are not getting in the way of my tasks. They are not interruptions to my life. They are a steady, core component of the work. And so I need to treat them like any other part of my job, and see their meatiness and especially the effort that goes into handling them. They are not nothing. When I am feeling frayed at the onslaught of micro-tasks, I remind myself: do small things with great love, even these monotonous mini responsibilities that are largely invisible to my children but that also enable our house to run. This, too, is the job.

Still. I was wondering if my strategic Magpies had any Sunday rituals that reset for the week such that Mondays feel a bit less muddy. On occasion, I sit at my desk on Sunday afternoons to clear my inbox and handle certain repetitive tasks related to the blog, and it always feels like I’m starting Monday ahead of the game. It’s not always practical or — more importantly, I think — in line with my priorities to get this done on Sunday, but it does feel lovely when it happens. I will say that on Monday mornings (and most mornings of the week, but especially the ones where I am intentionally clipping into a creative headspace), I am devoted to reading something inspiring that will set the emotional or intellectual tone for the week. I usually sit with some poetry when I get to my desk on Monday morning; sometimes I open my anthology to a random page and read whatever the day presents (a small and satisfying gambit!), but I also return to a few pieces that invariably draw me out and onto the page: Rita Dove’s “Dawn, Revisited”, Wendell Berry’s “The Peace of Wild Things,” any Mary Oliver, William Carlos Williams’ “Of Asphodel,” any section of Edith Hamilton’s “Mythology,” Seamus Heaney (poetry, but also his Nobel Prize acceptance speech, which makes me feel all the things), F. Scott Fitzgerald short fiction, Margaret Renkl essays, Patti Smith’s essay on failure (which I wrote about here). This kind of reading, which I’ve elsewhere described as “an energy multiplier,” is essential to my craft, but it’s also a determined weekly ritual. Perhaps Monday morning reading is more core to my “weekly reset” than I’d previously thought.

When I posed this question about “the Sunday reset” on Instagram, I was interested to learn that most of us use Sunday for laundry, meal prep, and other tasks that make the week feel more “grab and go,” while a small but vocal minority of us insist that Sundays are not for “getting a head start on the week” and instead for resetting internally through rest and quiet. One of you wrote: “On Sundays, I focus on me. Mondays will always arrive.” (Wow!) And another (mother of four!) wrote: “I do nothing on Sunday. Mondays are for resetting.” This stopped me in my tracks. Perhaps I have been thinking about this all wrong; maybe my Mondays aren’t “slow starts,” but my implicitly chosen days for admin. Maybe I’ve been using the weekends for other purposes, and that’s OK. I’ve never been intentional about this, though; it’s been a de facto arrangement. So it feels good to call it out and see how I feel about this division of the use of my time. Does it reflect my priorities?

Related, I am thinking of something a Magpie reader told me a few years ago: “You can start a new 24 hour period at any time.” As in, you don’t need to wait until dawn to start over. Same is true of the week. You can start a new seven day period at any time. So maybe your “Monday” is what most people consider “Sunday.” Or some other configuration. It’s all fungible!

I should call out the obvious here: there are many women who have no choice but to stack admin on Sundays, whether because they work or travel during the week, or because they are home with little babies and do not have the bandwidth to take on these tasks while a partner or spouse is not in the home on weekdays! So, there is an implicit privilege in being able to choose how and when to handle these things–but we all do handle them. (I want to also mention that one Magpie who lives abroad said it’s not possible to “reset” for the week in the typical ways outlined above, because groceries and other stores aren’t open; it would be considered rude to call to schedule appointments; etc. Fascinating to think about that!)

Anyhow, below, I’m dividing up the suggestions into two categories; you pick which one you belong to, or maybe cherry pick a few from each! It’s possible to dabble in both; one of you wrote: “I prioritize laundry only and try to enjoy the weekend.” This has been my mode, too, even though I’ve not been as clear-headed about it as she has. I, too, try to have all the laundry done, folded, and put away by Sunday evening, but rarely do anything else for the week on the weekend.

What would you add to either or both of these lists?

Sunday Rituals: Getting a Head Start on the Week.

Laundry

Change bed linens and towels

Prep week’s breakfasts — overnight oats, muffins, hard-boiled eggs

Dry-erase weekly calendar in kitchen

Full kitchen and bathroom clean

Quick sketch of meals for week

Family meeting to go over the week’s plans

Farmer’s market/grocery (some also have groceries delivered or do curbside pick up)

Iron everything for the week – uniforms, work clothes, etc

Quick clean-out of fridge

Clean out my purse and car!

Fill car with gas

Sunday Rituals: Resetting Internally through Rest.

Take a walk

Go to bed early / get a good night’s sleep

Skincare/grooming

Read, pamper, rest — “Monday will always arrive”

Post-Scripts.

This post may contain affiliate links. If you make a purchase through the links below, I may receive compensation.

+Kitchen above is not ours! It was at the gorgeous rental home we stayed at last weekend in Dickerson, MD, and it belongs to a Magpie reader! It’s on a property with active horse stables — the children loved checking for horses (and farm dogs!) while we were there. We went skiing at White Tail for one of the days; it’s about an hour from the mountain. Here is a link to the rental if you’re curious!

+Related to this post: how do you make your mornings easier?

+Current skincare favorites (I’m 40 years old version), plus all my favorite Goop beauty products (with reviews). Note that code SHOOP15 gets you 15% off all Goop products!!! I’m so excited about this promotion and will be using heavily myself.

+The books that give us new sky. Currently reading and loving this; next in my TBR pile are two heavily recommended books from fellow Magpie readers: Chris Whitaker’s All the Colors of the Dark and Amanda Peters’ The Berry Pickers. Both of these have been mentioned in the same breath as The God of the Woods, which I know many of you enjoyed (as did I, although there were some really provocative comments on my review post that made me think more deeply about the structurally confusing and problematic ending).

Shopping Break.

This post may contain affiliate links. If you make a purchase through the links below, I may receive compensation.

+I have and adore this caftan in a green color, but the new lilac is spectacular. Also loving this pintucked white dress and the new husband shirts (SO chic tucked into white jeans or worn open over a swimsuit — very breathable, airy, light fabric) from the brand. (15% off with JEN-15.)

+Chic $49 woven mary jane — reminds me of styles I’ve seen from much more expensive brands.

+My daughter loves her Wetbrush for detangling and I just saw they did a collab with LoveShackFancy at Target. The sweetest patterns. Perfect Easter basket filler! They also have a paddle brush style. LSF also teamed up with Goody to release the sweetest hair ties and clips but they seem sold out online – check your local store.

+I just received a mailer for AYR with a coupon code — 15% off with BESTBUDS — in case you want to snag on of those early morning tees we all love so much. My best friend brought hers on our little getaway last weekend and was, of course, raving about it. It fills such an unknown void in a wardrobe — part tee, part sweatshirt!

+Another unknown wardrobe void filler: this sweatshirt cardigan I have not stopped wearing since receiving last week. I love it as a top layer over athletic wear / athleisure for carpool on those mornings where it’s a tad chilly but not too bad? Love. I am usually an XXS in Varley (tends to run big) but I took an XS in this because they were sold out in the XXS, and the fit is great! Not too baggy! I also noticed this $20 Target terry cardigan — similar idea but more cropped. Love that pink color.

+Eyeing this tank and these leggings for spring fitness.

+I know it may seem early to be shopping sandals, but these wrap ones are absolutely gorgeous on (I own in rose napa and they’re a great nude; the saddle leather ones are iconic and remind me of the Hermes brown leather they use for their sandals) and sell out every year. Grab yours now! I love these for sundresses. VERY comfortable.

+New to me brand Ruti sent me some of these on-trend barrel/gaucho pants, similar to Nili Lotan’s popular Shons but MUCH more petite-friendly. They are INCREDIBLY comfortable – like, a ton of stretch, and therefore great “writing jeans.” I’ve become increasingly intolerant of rigid denim for daytime; I am sitting for far too often! Life is too short to wear uncomfortable jeans all day long. This reminds me of college — there was this denim boutique called “Judy B’s” (fellow Wahoos may remember it) and the people that worked there were so mean! Ha! But one of them once told my friend, when she complained about how uncomfortable a pair of jeans was: “Well, these are standing only jeans.” I’ve never forgotten that. I think I’m beyond the “standing only” jean styles…at least for day!

+Little sensory play kits for kids. When my kids were a little younger, they loved these. We did a ton of sensory play during our COVID days. Meanwhile, a fun activity for slightly older kids. We love the Klutz brand!

+This everyday dress has been a bestseller the past few days — lots of Magpie love — so resharing before it sells out.

+I’ve been using this glowy skin primer/SPF the past week and am hooked. It’s great for those mornings you don’t have time or don’t want to put on makeup but want a touch of coverage/color/glow/spf. They just sent me a 20% off code — JEN20. I’ve also been using this undereye cream, which I like because it’s highly tinted, so it provides a touch of coverage or maybe color correction along with the skincare, which is nice.

+Adorable book caddy for a child’s room.

+I’ve always loved these sunnies — the color options are so unusual and fun.

+I did order this robe for spring. The pattern is so charming.

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Nicole
Nicole
1 month ago

I love hearing how other Magpies reset! For years I fiercely protected weekend time with my family, I had a set cleaning/reset schedule during the week that allowed the weekend to be spent doing anything or nothing. Then life happened – our family grew, we moved and moved again, and bought a house all within 16 months. Now we aim for a mix of rest and reset on the weekends. My husband and I tackle the housecleaning and home/yard maintenance together during weekend nap time and I still manage most of the household and family admin tasks (bills, laundry, grocery shopping, errands, etc) during the week to free up weekend time. I miss the old way but know that this is (hopefully) temporary while we’re in this season of life.

Deirdre
Deirdre
1 month ago

Like many other Magpies, I try to keep Sunday as a restful day for walks after church or some other activity like exploring a new to us area. It doesn’t always work that way but we try. I also menu plan for the week (or else all is lost) and update the weekly white board calendar so the kids know what to expect re: after school activities or appointments or if they need to bring a lunch from home etc. It is meant to be for the kids, but lets face I use it more than them for reference! I also note all my ‘to-dos’ for the week – need to make ortho appointment, order wallpaper, research sofas or (Lord, send me strength) summer camps. A steadfast in our Sunday is a early-ish family dinner where I make something a little more elaborate than usual for dinner and get our evening wind down started a little earlier than usual to allow a slower pace to the showers and backpack checking etc. and allows my husband and myself a little longer after the kids nighttime routine to connect before the week. Sunday evenings are actually one of my favorite times of the week (probably fueled by the fallacy that this is the week I will get it all together!)

Your books choices sound amazing. I really want to read the Berry Pickers but for some reason anything with the disappearance of a child is just too chilling for me – but it looks so, so good. Maybe it is the bottle of wine that needs to age a little more for me (or I need to age a little more!). I have been on a Alice McDermott binge since reading Absolution so I am loading up my kindle with those as we get ready for Spring Break.

Kelly
Kelly
1 month ago

I mentioned on Instagram that my Sunday is necessarily restful, because I live in a country where most things are closed on Sunday. But, Saturday will usually contain a small grocery shop to get us through until Monday. Saturday usually includes a big breakfast followed by a physical outing to tire out the kids, and we do a few loads of laundry that won’t get folded until Monday (I have rolling bins just for clean laundry). An « everything shower » is one way I reset for the week, and if naps align I use my red light and listen to a podcast after. Sunday we do a big family tidy together (usually only around an hour, maybe an hour and a half if things are dire). We review our schedule for the week together. I meal plan using my Paprika app, which is sort of leisurely to do on a Sunday. This week I used it to import a bunch of recipes from Substack. The work of the weekend is noticing and paying attention when I’m not rushed off my feet: what’s bothering us daily that I should brainstorm a solution for? Whose shoes are getting too tight? What pantry staples are we out of? What friends or family haven’t we seen in a while that I should reach out to? What home tasks need addressed? I add things to my list, but if it’s not an emergency, it can wait for Monday. If my MIL is available she and I take the kids to church while my husband has some solo time to go to the gym.
The true reset happens Monday: any automated emails I set up go out (it’s rude in France to email someone about work on the weekend, and illegal if you’re their employer), I do a fridge clean out, and then our cleaning lady comes for 3 hours (during which I fold laundry and do digital admin). My grocery order comes in and I do any restocking from other sites for special gluten free snacks, cleaning supplies, new clothes for the kids. Then I take the kids to the playground for 2 hours and we do an easy dinner or takeout after. I can finish any last tasks on my phone at the playground if needs must.

Kelly
Kelly
1 month ago
Reply to  Jen Shoop

You’ve reminded me of a beloved little anecdote about Saint Rafael peeling turnips for the love of Christ. The way the act of reverence transforms what you are doing. I love the novel In This House of Bede (trigger warnings for anyone who probably couldn’t do The Berry Pickers), and the domesticity central to holy orders. I’ve also been reading a lot of Thich Nhat Hahn recently since his “how to…” are a great size for purse books.

Kelly
Kelly
1 month ago
Reply to  Jen Shoop

PS what an honor to be compared to your beloved mother! Your love for her shines so fiercely. I assure you I am not on her level!

Megan
Megan
1 month ago

My biggest prep for the week activity is grocery shopping. However, I switched to going on Fridays instead of Saturdays or Sundays during the pandemic (my office closes an hour early on Fridays so it slides neatly into that slot of time), and that minor swap has been felt life-changing! I feel so good going into the weekend knowing that my most important chore is done, the stores are less crowded, and I do the most cooking on the weekends so all of my groceries are fresh. During the summer, I usually also run to the farmer’s market on Saturday morning, but that feels more like fun than a chore.

Anna
Anna
1 month ago

“I’m out with the lanterns, looking for the stories in the schedule” made me literally lol, so thank you for that. I find that certain research/computer-heavy admin tasks are actually far more difficult for me to do on Sundays rather than Mondays because I don’t sit at my desk and use my work computer setup with its big monitor/keyboard on the weekends, and I need that setup in order to effectively get that kind of work done. (I stick to my small personal Macbook outside of work.) So I will wait until Monday AM to tackle them (don’t tell my employer!) I think this is part of aging? Like that tweet that says millennials firmly believe that certain tasks like buying flights are “big screen” activities, not small screen aka phone activities.

Anne
Anne
1 month ago

I use Sunday as a day of sabbath (the book The Ruthless Elimination of Hurry helped me). It’s such a treat to have a day to just relax, and recharge. It pushes me to get meal prep done Saturday. I will always make sure my lunch is packed and coffee is prepped to make Monday a little easier though.

Sophia
Sophia
1 month ago
Reply to  Anne

YES the Ruthless Elimination of Hurry changed how I view Sundays. Highly recommend.
My husband and I are Catholic and so try to embrace “Sabbath” when my resident physician schedule allows. No grocery shopping, no shopping at all if we can help it! We see this as trying to reduce store traffic where we can to encourage stores to also give employees the day off. We schedule grocery pick up for Monday after work to account for this. We do have a “family meeting” where we go over events and car plans (we share one car!) for the week. A real game changer has been scheduling the “happy birthday!” texts to send for the week, since iOS allows you to schedule texts now!

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