All the Pretty Horses.

Jen Shoop

5 years ago

Are you hanging in there?

Here to say that if you find yourself shuttling between moments of “ohmygod” and “I wish I was a Pinterest mom, but this is not happening” and “is it appropriate to have a glass of wine yet [it’s 3 p.m.]” and then tender-hearted, maybe-this-is-teaching-me-to-just-slow-down-and-soak-up-my-loved-ones and then panic-stricken anxiety about catching the virus / what this is doing to the economy and healthcare system —

I feel ya. I’m right there with you.

A few years ago, I cried on the phone to one of my girlfriends after a loved one had passed away. I remember blubbering through my words, making mincemeat of myself, and at one point saying, “I don’t feel like I should be allowed to feel this sad, but I do–” and she said: “Woah, woah, woah. Jen. You are allowed to grieve. You are allowed to feel every single thing you feel. You don’t need to ask for permission.”

I’ve repeated these words countless times to myself and to loved ones who need to hear it. “I shouldn’t feel like this because [someone else has it worse / I need to be strong / it will all be OK / etc.].” We all say these things to ourselves, feebly or forcibly attempting to brook the flow of our emotions with reason or guilt or empathy for others, but —

We are permitted to feel the way we feel.

And sometimes that means feeling fifteen different ways about a single situation.

Deep breath. We’re all in this together.

Today, sharing some distractions if you’re looking for ’em — all the pretty horses, if you will: a couple of posts from the Magpie archives you may not have seen, some pretty pictures, and a few links for some retail therapy…

AN ODE TO FRIENDSHIP

REFLECTIONS ON MY INTENSE CASE OF IMPOSTER SYNDROME IN MY 20S

NOW WOULD BE A GOOD TIME TO MAKE CINNAMON TOAST

I LOVE HOW D.C. FEELS

ON READING

ENDINGS ARE HARD TO WRITE

DISTRACTION AS A GIFT