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First — what is the most difficult part of your day? For a long time, bedtime felt like the final, occasionally insurmountable, hurdle in my day, but now the children are older and their bedtime routines have shrunk in size and complexity and they are pretty docile about it. My son is bone-tired by the time seven thirty rolls around: that marching, never-off five-year-old energy needs replenishing. He’s sort of like one of those monkey wind-ups — he goes and goes, chirping and clattering through his day, and then just flips off abruptly, with no resistance or warning. The fact that bedtime now feels straight-forward for me is a reminder that parenthood is a process, a practice. It is a moving target. There is no constant but change.
Now, however, I find the mornings an unpleasant crunch punctuated by urgent expeditations: “are you done with breakfast?”; “go go go”; “run upstairs and get your socks”; “put on your coat!” I’m annoying myself just reading this litany spilt on the page. Even though I know I could alleviate some of this by waking myself and my children up just a little bit earlier, it is difficult for me to motivate myself out of bed. (How I long to be one of those mothers who wakes at 5 a.m. to enjoy a quiet cup of coffee and some journal time. Alas, this is not – and will never – be me. This is because Landon and I prioritize the evening hours as time for us to connect — watch TV together, catch up, handle STPs — “Shoop Talking Points.” And afterward, I like a little time to read in bed. I don’t see myself ceding either of those priorities to an earlier wake up any time soon…!) Besides, it seems like my son in particular needs the sleep — I routinely need to wake him up. And this is with a 7:30 p.m. bedtime!
My question for you — besides the obvious of “pack lunches the night before” (check) and “lay out the kids’ clothes the night before” (check again), what brings ease into your morning routine?
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I will say that once the children are out the door, I find my personal morning ritual nourishing. I almost always do the following:
7:45 a.m. Kiss my children and send them out the door.
7:46 a.m. Drink a full glass of ice water out of a tall cooler glass. (Not a water bottle. I can’t explain it. It has to be a tall glass of ice water.) I fill my water bottle at the same time, just so it’s ready to go for the exercise/the rest of the day. While I’m drinking my water, I text my mom the praying hands emoji, and she does the same — it’s our little prayer circle of two.
7:50 a.m. Walk onto my back covered patio to breathe in the air, listen to the birdsong, and remind myself of my own smallness. This is not a long process — usually just one or two minutes does it for me. I suppose this partly fills the blank left by my former walks with Tilly. (I miss her.)
7:52 a.m. Wear my LED red light therapy mask for 10 minutes. I usually do this while checking my phone or tidying the kitchen.
8:02 a.m. Make a green smoothie with the Vitamix (currently on sale!), easily one of the best purchases we’ve ever made for our kitchen. Worth every penny.
8:05 a.m. Read something to wake up my brain while enjoying my smoothie. I keep a few books out and easily accessible across the house for this purpose. In the kitchen, I have Margaret Renkl’s “howling love letter to the natural world” (a series of short essays that are easy to read in one bite); in the living room, I have Mary Oliver’s Rules for the Dance (a book on metrical poetry scansion — easier to digest in small sips); and in my studio, I have a lot of books, but I usually reach for this poetry anthology and read one or two poems. My son recently noticed me annotating one of these books — I always read a physical book with a pen in hand — and said, “Mama – we don’t write in books.” It was an interesting challenge to communicate why and which contexts annotation is appropriate.
8:15 a.m. Catch up with Mr. Magpie – he’s usually back from drop off by now.
8:25 a.m. Change into exercise clothes and, if planning to wash my hair after exercising, apply Mielle rosemary-mint treatment oil and Anablue hair treatment oil to my hair. Both of these promote healthy, strong hair and improve the overall softness and texture. I’m a big believer in them, especially since I use hot tools on my hair every time I shower. For fitness wear, I am currently obsessed with the leggings and matching tanks from Beyond Yoga, Vuori’s Energy tees, Beyond Yoga Featherweight longsleeves, and Varley’s FreeSoft heathered leggings. All of these are supremely soft, comfortable, and move with your body.
8:30 a.m. Exercise. As of January 1, I have been trying to move my body every day, but in a new-to-me method. I used to think of “exercise” in such limited, prescriptive terms: I had to run 3-4 miles (or complete 30-40 minutes on a stationary bike) and then do at least 10 minutes of arms or abs — better yet if I could motivate to stack a 20-30 minute Heather Robertson video on top. It was unnecessarily stringent and deterring me from working out as often as I could have, because it meant an hour or more of exercising (once you factor in warm up, cooldown) and then I’d be so sweaty, I’d have to take a shower and dry my hair. By the time I was done with exercising, showering, dressing, etc, it was usually 10 a.m., and that was only if I was closing the door on my kids and sprinting right into my exercise regimen, which always made me feel rushed and angsty and slightly resentful, and in turn meant I didn’t have time to enjoy the smoothie, read, etc! So at best, I was exercising twice s a week because it took so much time. Now, my goal is to get in about 20-30 minutes of exercise most mornings using videos from Physique57 or Heather Robertson. Twice a week, if possible, I aim for longer sessions that are more cardio-focused — a run or stationery bike session followed by abs/arms or a 40 minute full body sculpt video. This way, most mornings, I can exercise and rinse my body but not have to wash my hair, and I’m done with the whole thing in under an hour. It has made such a powerful change in my life. I feel physically better in my own body, have more energy, and of course that’s not even addressing the powerful mental/mood benefits. So far I’ve exercised 15 out of 17 days this month and it hasn’t even felt that difficult to keep up with. Like, you can do anything for 20 minutes, right?
9 a.m. Pour myself coffee — Landon always has it ready and waiting.
9:02 a.m. Rinse off in the shower, get dressed.
9:15 a.m. Do my skincare/makeup routine. I actually handle skincare as soon as I wake up, before I get up with my children. Wash my face, apply serums, and hydrate. Then after I work out, I rinse my body/face, reapply hydration, and put on my makeup.
9:30 a.m. Sit down at my desk.
Please share your morning ritual must-dos and how you ease into your day.
Post-Scripts.
+Photo above actually from our stay at Lupaia in Tuscany. I wish I woke up to that view in the morning!
+On making everything important.
Shopping Break.
+A propos of this being the year of the fox: I just stumbled upon and ordered this memoir about an unlikely friendship between a fox and a writer. I also have this and this in my TBR. We are definitely in our naturalist era, aren’t we?
+Planning to wear this to Mr. Magpie’s birthday celebration next weekend! And while we’re talking Doen: they’re running an enormous winter sale that can’t be missed. I ordered this dress, this top (love the material of their tops – ultra lightweight and airy, so easy to tuck with no bulk), and this pointelle tee ($59!!).
+This lace top would be so chic for a date night.
+Target run: this adorable quilted floral toy bin, this woven lamp, this melamine tray, this striped bolster, and these gingham towels for a boy’s bathroom! The red piping is so charming. Reminded me a little of this print from Peter Dunham and one of my favorite prints ever, Katie Ridder’s Beetlecat. (I have a Beetlecat pillow in my son’s room!)
+Hotel Lobby launched a new scent – Blue Skies – yesterday! They sent me a sample and it does smell divine and just what I want as we head into the new year.
+A really good price for a jumbo of the best setting powder ever.
+We just completed this puzzle as a family – it was really fun. I think because the kids could focus on individual figures with clear outfits/colors to hunt for, it made it slightly easier for them, but still challenging for all of us.
+This top and skirt situation are just beyond spectacular.