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What Are Your Grooming Routines?

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What are your grooming routines? Which ones are non-negotiables and which are a little squibblier and more haphazard? This is a nosy post – but I am so curious about this. Back in my start-up days in Chicago, there was a bright and impressive female founder in my incubator who had the most incredible lashes — long, full, but they didn’t appear to be extensions or faux, especially since she seemed otherwise light-handed and natural with makeup. I finally asked her about them one day at the photocopy machine, and she said: “Jen, I don’t do nails, I don’t do hair, I don’t do much makeup — eyelash extensions are my one beauty splurge. I’m never without them.” I asked where she had them done and immediately set up an appointment. It turned out she had “an eyelash girl” who drove to downtown Chicago once every few weeks from her home out of state (I believe Wisconsin) and serviced a handful of clients. I was one such for a year in Chicago, and I loved the way I looked. I’d roll out of bed and feel put-together, finished, glam without a stitch of makeup on. The key (IMO) is asking for the most natural (lowest volume) extensions of the highest quality material they carry (usually mink). Unfortunately, I found they absolutely destroyed my natural lashes over time, and I ended up having to call it quits. I don’t know whether other women have stronger lashes, or use various strengthening treatments about which I know nothing, but nowadays, I treat myself to lash extensions once every year or two (whenever I’m in Manhattan — I love this one spot called Beau that was around the corner from my second UWS apartment), and that’s about as much as my lashes can handle. But I know there are women who are religious about their extensions. I also know a few women who have their hair blown out once a week and try to make that blow out stretch for three or four days, others who insist on regular facials and peels of various kinds, and some who are devotees of particular waxing regimens.

What about you?

The only grooming routine to which I’m fully committed are my nails. I get them done weekly unless I have a gel, with which I try to be sparing (e.g., only on vacations or if I have a particularly packed social agenda), as last year, a technician destroyed my nails with a bad gel to the point that I had to use a nail strengthener for nearly two months before getting a regular manicure again. Lesson learned: stick with my trusted crew. My mom and I both go to the same salon and request the same two women, week in and week out. I try to overlap my appointments with my mother’s whenever possible, and I treasure the reminder that such path-crossings can be so easily coordinated after living far from her for nearly ten years. It seems kismet to share this routine because I fully inherited it from her. Growing up, my mother had a standing Thursday morning appointment with a technician named Gloria who worked out of the now-shuttered Salon Jean-Paul on Yuma St in NW D.C. She never missed this small window to treat herself, and she deserved it. She was raising five children and if she indulged in anything else, I cannot recall it. I followed suit with weekly manicures when I started my first full-time job out of college. I was working in Tyson’s and living in Georgetown, and the weekly appointments at Vicky’s on Wisconsin Avenue made me feel like I’d made it in some way. This habit has persisted across decades and multiple metropolises, and I now feel half-baked without my nails done, even if I am entirely predictable with my polish selection: always bright red (Essie Really Red or Russian Roulette, OPI Big Apple Red) or white-pink (OPI Lisbon Wants Moor or Let’s Be Friends). Just after I’d moved from Chicago to New York, my best friend invited me over for cocktails at her Chelsea apartment and I arrived with bare nails. “Oh my God, Jen, is everything OK?” she asked, eyeing my hands. In short, for some time now, polished nails have read like shorthand for Bob Marley’s “Three Little Birds”: every little thing is going to be alright. I also love the small square of thirty or forty minutes to read my Kindle or just sit, captive, with nothing to do but space out. We all need time to do nothing at all.

Besides the nails, I get my eyebrows done whenever I feel like I really need it — which is to say, not enough. Most times, I tweeze myself and make do. The ladies at European Wax Center routinely scold me for my delinquency. (EWC is so-so, but perfectly fine for my needs, which is just to clean up, not to re-shape. I appreciate that you can schedule, cancel, shift appointments online, and that they have lots of convenient locations. I do wish, like most children of the 80s, that I’d not plucked so much in my youth! I was having my makeup done a few weeks ago, and the makeup artist said: “You have beautiful brows — but then again, I’m old school. I like them on the thinner side.” I wasn’t sure what to think of that! Do my brows date me?! Ha! That particular artist also said: “Brows are sisters, not twins,” and I thought that was a clever phrasing, and so true! Mine are definitely asymmetrical, and require some manipulation with an eyebrow pencil every single day. So I suppose the daily penciling is a part of my grooming routine, too.)

The one splurge I’ve made in this category is having laser hair removal on my bikini line. After we moved to D.C. and joined a club with a pool, the summer months became a tedium of shaving. I screwed up my courage and went to Capital Laser and Skin Care in Chevy Chase — if you’re local, strongly recommend. A beautiful, immaculate facility with attentive technicians/staff/doctors. The hair removal process is painful but quick — the sharp sensation immediately subsides. I believe I have a fairly high tolerance for pain (?) and would rate it about a 4/10. You can get laughing gas if you’re nervous, but I went without and felt it was totally worth the 10 minutes of pain to be able to jump into a suit at a moment’s notice. I had three treatments a few weeks apart last spring/summer and haven’t need any touch ups yet. I note this because some clients need to go back once a season, and others go for years without needing any touch-ups. Several of the staff at CLSC insisted that the MVP of laser hair removal is underarms. They added it’s the most painful (!) but then you never need to shave your underarms again. I will admit I’m intrigued, but shaving the underarms has never once struck me as a burden, so I’ll defer that for a future time in my life.

I’ve already shared my fairly involved haircare routine, including the fact that I find myself gradually migrating towards more frequent professional blowouts. In my 20s and early 30s, I was a bit more lax on styling and blow-drying my hair, but I routinely felt unkempt, especially given how often I’d wind up tying my hair back in a pony tail. As I’ve gotten older, I’ve cared a lot more about my hair being “done” — it’s a shortcut to feeling pulled-together, even when I’m being pulled in 20 different directions.

I will admit that I am lazy about getting my hair cut and colored. I should probably go once a quarter, but I stretch my visits to 3x a year, and sometimes even 2x (yikes!). This has become easier as I’ve retreated towards my natural brunette coloring. Brighter blond hair requires so much more maintenance! I can’t put my finger on this hair care indolence, because it can be relaxing to check out for a morning of beautification. Part of it is that I go all the way into Georgetown for hair cut and color with Ismail at George Salon at the Four Seasons, which is a bit of a schlep and kind of parking nightmare. You can have your car valeted at the hotel, but they’ve just jacked the prices to north of $30, plus tip, for even a two hour visit, which feels wanton. (It used to be $20, which felt more forgivable.) Now, I face the routine parking roulette of Georgetown — an inconvenience I do not miss from my years living in that area. (The frustration of driving home with a trunk full of groceries or a full bladder only to circle around your neighborhood for 10 minutes, or wind up parking eight blocks away…!) Anyhow, I get it done when I can, but I’m not prompt about it.

On a skincare level, I’ve never once had a facial (!) which I realize is strangely inconsistent with my willingness to try countless at-home beauty products. For some reason, I’d rather spend my money a million other ways over having a facial. I can’t explain my disinterest? It doesn’t compute. I’m going to a spa with my mother in a few weeks, and I didn’t even look at the facial menu. Any time I’m presented with the opportunity to visit a spa, though, I sprint to request a massage — there is nothing more relaxing or rewarding for me, especially as a frequent runner and persistent worrier.

At home, I apply a suite of different masks and scrubs whenever I feel I need it, but I’m not scheduled about any of them. Lately, I’ve been sleeping in Chantecaille’s Jasmine and Lily repairing mask (so has Mr. Magpie!), but my go-to, holy grail mask for before I go out for an evening is Clarins’ V-Facial Depuffing Mask. It is so good — unlike anything I’ve ever tried before. It chisels your features and also leaves skin soft and fresh. Strongly rec. A beauty brand called Newa just reached out and offered to send me one of their radio frequency wrinkle reducing devices. I’ve read about these, and also the LED masks that so many beauty cognoscenti rave about, with piqued interest for some time now, and I jumped on the opportunity to give it a whirl. I’ll report back with thoughts. If you want to test it alongside me, they offered us 15% off with code JEN15.

OK, how about you? Please share your routines, your non-negotiables, and how you arrived at them! I’m willing to be convinced…!

Post Scripts.

+How do you fill your cup in under an hour?

+I won’t soon forget. (A love note to Mr. Magpie.)

+”Beyond a wholesome discipline, be gentle with yourself.”

+On the people who supported me early in my career as a writer.

Shopping Break.

+HHH re-released its Cosima nap dress in a blue stripe — you might remember this was one of my most-worn dresses last summer. I love the elongated smocking and high neckline. Feel fresh!

+Sweetest Zara finds for littles: this blockprint canvas hat, this sailboat sweatsuit.

+Fun hair accessory for summer.

+After all the Magpie upvotes for silk pillowcases, I discovered this silk travel neck pillow

+Love these Hermes-esque sandals from Margaux. A perfect summer heel if you might be attending events on grass. Also — Margaux just offered us $35 off orders $200+ with code MAGPIE35 (must be a first-time shopper).

+My favorite Vitamin C product.

+Cute quilted blockprint jackets for a steal.

+If you liked the La Ligne striped knit shorts set but not the price tag, consider this Zara.

+A reader asked for Juliet Dunn style dresses for less — this Tuckernuck fits the bill! Another great look for less find: this tile-print Mango (under $100!) feels like something by Cara Cara or D&G.

+For your best boho mama summer vibes. Think bare feet, loose hair, misty English rose gardens…

+COS has some killer accessories out right now — this bag feels very Khaite, and these mesh/woven/net flats are major The Row vibes for less.

+Gorgeous statement clutch for summer weddings.

+I swear by DryBar hair spray and this pomade (my son has a recalcitrant cow lick) for taming my children’s hair in the morning. Just ordered some of these fun-colored hair ties for my daughter.

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