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Weekend Vibes: On Visualizing Balance.

british cottage

My Latest Snag: Staud Wells Dress.

I wore this gorgeous pink dress to dinner in NYC this week and WOW. She looks even better IRL — she is spectacular on! The material is a tad stretchy, so I took a size down from my usual size and it fit like a glove. It also comes in black and I think it would make an incredible wardrobe workhorse. Layer beneath a cardigan or cropped jacket for a more conservative occasion, pair with big earrings for a cocktail party, or dress down with sandals.

This Week’s Most Popular: Spring Finds.

Lots of chic spring stripes this week!

01. STRIPED CRIB/TODDLER BED SHEET

02. CHIC INDOOR/OUTDOOR BOLSTER PILLOWS

03. ANTHRO SOMERSET DRESS IN STRIPE

04. LOEWE-INSPIRED BASKET BAG ($45!)

05. EASTER EGG DECOR

06. J. CREW BUTTON DOWN

07. STRIPED ACRYLIC DRINKWARE

08. J. CREW WOVEN CREWNECK SWEATER

09. JUMPSUIT

10. FRENCH SOLE SANDALS

11. BEST PENS EVER

12. AMO PUFF SLEEVED CARDIGAN

Weekend Musings: What Does Balance Actually Look Like?

One theme that has been emerging from a lot of our conversations on “balance” in motherhood is that we need to remember that we are human beings, too, and that though we willingly make sacrifices for our children, we must also care for ourselves, and follow through on extra-familial commitments (professional and otherwise). Knowing how much time we afford to ourselves and our careers relative to the demands of our children is the sticky, ungainly, mutating bit. There are no formulas or constants. I am finding it will look different week to week, day to day. To put a finer point on it: maybe the vision of myself calming surfing right down the middle of a channel in some kind of zenlike state of motherly equilibrium is not the appropriate mnemonic. Maybe it’s going to look more like tacking and adjusting and tacking and adjusting. Small movements left and right in search of equipoise, but no one moment in which I’m just cruising along in a straight line.

My girlfriend Mackenzie shared a really insightful perspective on this over salads at Match 65 (a poignant backdrop, as it was the site at which she’d introduced her beloved and now-deceased grandmother to her husband many years ago) this week in NYC: “Maybe it’s not measuring how much ‘balance’ we have on a daily basis, but looking at it over a longer period of time. Like, net, over the course of a month, did I feel like I did too much or too little in one direction?” I was drawn to the pragmatism here: sometimes I’m too close-in, my face pressed up against the glass, to take an accurate measurement. Maybe a monthly pull-up is the right cadence. This felt startlingly obvious after she’d shared it. When I managed teams in my former career, I found that “90 day plans” were the most effective tool for organizing members around goals/deliverables that were specific and attainable, kept up with the near-frenetic pace of start-up life, and yet had enough of a panoramic view to keep overarching, organizational objectives in sight. I’d dappled with smaller and longer timelines, but I kept finding that 90 days was just right for most of the (product-oriented) work we were doing. Enough time to build something small and test it. Enough granularity that we wouldn’t feel overwhelmed with the length we had to go.

I wonder if, in motherhood, reflecting on the measure of balance I have in my life should account for a month-long retrospective. It feels right to me. What do you think? Are there other areas of your life where you have found it helpful to zoom in or zoom out when in reflection mode? I’ve found, for example, that being more granular with my exercise plan — committing to running every other day, operating according to a one-day-on-one-day-off cadence — was much more successful than when I was courser-grained: “I’d like to run 3 times this week.”

How about you? Are there areas of your life where you have seen better results zooming in or out?

Shopping Break.

+I’ve shared this simple white dress before, but it is just such a chic staple for summer, and under $50. Pair with leather slides, sneakers, etc!

+These $50 huggies have sold out before — a great everyday style option. Have good intelligence that these look real. If you’re more of a statement earring gal, how fab are these under-$50 double heart earrings?! Love both colorways.

+This slim rolling cart is a clever and attractive storage solution if you’re short on space. We had something similar we wedged in right next to our washer/dryer in our Manhattan apartment and kept lots of household items in it — spray bottles, cleaning gloves, etc.

+Perhaps spurred on by my post on bold colors, I am currently in the market for some really fun, bright-colored trousers. These ones and these ones turned my head.

+Speaking of bold colors: how SPECTACULAR is this J. Crew statement?!

+Chic cane console table for your front entryway.

+Sweetest set of hair clips for a little love.

+I know I’ve written about this makeup-melting/removing balm before but it is just divine. There is nothing more luxurious than swiping this on and removing with a warm, wet washcloth. It smells like heaven and skin feels so soft and moisturized after.

+Adore this dress — the contrasting trim, the bodice, the flutter sleeves!

+Rechargeable table lamps for your next al fresco dinner party. Impossibly chic!

+CUTE crochet crossbody. Comes in three great colors.

+Keep hearing really good things about this face mask. It’s pricey but it seems like a lot of gals with great skin use it.

+My fabulous interior designer friend, Jen Hunter, recently shared that she uses faux florals in our home. I’d honestly never thought to do this, but you should see her home! It made me realize my mother has a few faux florals in her home, too. I love the idea that you always have a botanical/floral presence even if you’ve not purchased cut flowers. Jen insists the arrangements she uses from Diane James Home trick most visitors! She has this one, and I love this arrangement or this one.

+On my summer wishlist: a pretty caftan/dress from D’Ascoli.

+These rope frames are amazing.

+This tote reminds me lightly of my beloved Pam Munson Isla Bahia – but much less expensive.