My Latest Snag: Mme Mink Teddy Coat.
I received this bow-bedecked teddy coat by Mme Mink a few weeks ago but had been waiting for the right weather and level of frivolity to pull it out and my trip to New York this past week was the perfect occasion. Never mind that it took up half my suitcase — worth it. It is SO fabulous and so fun. The dusty blue is so cheeky and unexpected (and very Magpie, if I do say so myself), but it also comes in a darling pink and a rich chocolate. I wore mine to dinner over a La Ligne dress almost identical to this current-season one one night and then over Gucci tights and this fab velvet mini dress (even better IRL — has a kind of structured fit and the cuffs are beyond chic).
This Week’s Most Popular: Winter and Holiday Finds.
01. SET OF DOUBLE-SIDED MAGNETIC BUILDING TILES IN A GRINCH THEME TO SPARK YOUR LITTLES’ CREATIVITY
02. VIBRANT CITRINE-COLORED CLUTCH COVERED IN DRAMATIC OSTRICH FEATHERS — SUCH A UNIQUE, HEAD-TURNING STATEMENT PIECE
03. QUILTED NAVY PLAID LONGLINE COAT WITH CONTRASTING BROWN CORDUROY ACCENTS
04. HEAVENLY PAINTED GLASS BIRD ORNAMENT WITH WHITE FEATHERED TAIL
05. RED AND PINK CANDY CANE STRIPED EXTRA-THICK WRAPPING PAPER TO ADD SOME FLAIR TO YOUR GIFTS
06. SOFT COTTON BLEND LONG SLEEVE BASIC RIBBED TURTLENECK — THIS CLOSET STAPLE LOOKS GREAT IN BLACK, OR OPT FOR MORE OF A STATEMENT WITH THE FUCHSIA SHADE
07. LITTLE GIRLS’ CREWNECK RIBBED KNIT CHUNKY SWEATER IN LIGHT BLUE WITH A FESTIVE FAIR ISLE PRINT
08. WOOL BLEND OVERSIZED LONGLINE SHIRT JACKET WITH LARGE FRONT PATCH POCKETS…THIS COZY PIECE COMES IN A CHIC CAMEL TONE OR A NEUTRAL PLAID FOR A MORE RUSTIC LOOK
09. GORGEOUS SHEARLING LINED BROWN SUEDE CHELSEA BOOTS WITH A SLIGHT PLATFORM SOLE — THE CONTRASTING SHEARLING TRIM ON THESE ARE TO DIE FOR!
10. MULTICOLOR FLORAL PRINTED MIDI DRESS WITH BILLOWING, VOLUMINOUS LONG SLEEVES AND SHIRRED WAIST DETAILING…THIS DRESS HAS SO MANY FEMININE DETAILS THAT ARE SUBTLE, YET STUNNING
11. BLACK WOOL BLEND DOUBLE BREASTED KNEE-LENGTH SCARF COAT WITH WELTED FRONT POCKETS FOR A SLEEK, MODERN SILHOUETTE
12. LIGHTWEIGHT SQUARE CRYSTAL BOW-SHAPED DROP EARRINGS — HAVE HEARD RAVE REVIEWS FROM SEVERAL MAGPIES WHO’VE PURCHASED THESE
13. PLEATED BRIGHT FUSCHIA MIDI SKIRT WITH A SUBTLE SATIN FINISH AND AN ELASTIC WAIST…THIS SKIRT IS THE PERFECT BALANCE OF STYLE AND COMFORT
14. SET OF THREE 10-INCH TALL GLOWING GOLDEN CHRISTMAS TREE DECORATIONS
15. MUTED, YET COLORFUL VELVET STILETTO HEELS WITH A POINTED TOE THAT WILL ADD A LITTLE FLAIR TO ANY OUTFIT
16. FLEECE AND FAUX LEATHER OVERSIZED TOTE BAG THAT I SWEAR CAN FIT EVERYTHING YOU OWN
Weekend Musings: On Being Seen.
I read an interview over at Anne Helen Petersen’s smart blog a few weeks ago that I have been unable to stop thinking about. In it, widow and writer Katie Hawkins-Gaar commented:
“One of the most helpful things I heard from someone in regards to my own loss was, “Oh, it’s been no time at all!” Grief advocate and psychotherapist Megan Devine told me that when I was interviewing her for a Fortune article. It was January 2020, nearly three years since my husband’s death. Three years! It seemed like anyone else would think it had been a long time. But Megan, who lost her own partner suddenly, knew differently. It was the kindest thing she could have said, and it’s stuck with me ever since.”
I have been lingering on these words not only because they are true (there is no timeline to grief, just as there are no straight lines in nature) but because of the baked-in generosity of the expression. I knew intuitively the way those words must have felt: validating, accommodating, permission-granting. Their shape felt familiar. I’ve been straining to remember when I’d encountered them and realized I’ve been the fortunate beneficiary of several parallel generosities in the realm of parenting, all of them kindnesses at the hands of fellow mothers. The one that springs to mind with particular clarity took place just after we’d moved from New York City to Bethesda, and I took my daughter to a dentist appointment within a week or two of arriving because dental records were overdue at her new Montessori. Mini has always had a strange (strained) relationship with the dentist. Longtime readers may remember the time I absolutely drowned on the way to a dentist appointment with her when she was three. I could not help her through an epic tantrum, and she was flailing on a dirty sidewalk off Amsterdam Ave, and a stranger stopped to ask my daughter if she was OK, implying that I was either kidnapping her or ill-qualified to understand her needs. It was one of the few times I have felt entirely out of my depth as a mother. I mean, I often feel confused and conflicted, but here was a time I felt that I could not get through a moment, not even with bribery, or accommodation, or any of the other last-fiddle choices to which we turn in moments of parenting crisis. I ended up having to call my husband out of a meeting so he could help. I then sat outside her dentist’s office on the Upper West Side, my chin wobbling, alone and defeated.
So maybe my daughter sensed my nerves as we made our way to her new dentist, Dr. Karen Benitez*, in Bethesda. Or maybe she has some deep-seated fear of dentists. Or maybe she was navigating the upheaval of our recent move. But whatever it was, she lost it during her routine exam. We went from “I will not open my mouth” to — I kid you not — her throwing dental implements across the room. My daughter is not this way, has never been this way! I still can’t believe it happened — can hardly imagine her throwing anything at all in anger. She is generally mild-mannered, not particularly physical, and a rule follower. And yet there she was: a tangle of windmilling arms, wailing, and writhing. Somehow, we got through the bare minimum required for the dentist to fill out the required form.
“I am so sorry,” I said to the dentist afterward. “We just moved, and she hates the dentist, and…” Much to my horror, I found a sob beginning to escape my lips.
“Oh, don’t even think about it. This happens all the time,” she replied. I burst into tears. This dentist, whom I had just met twenty minutes prior, and whose exam room my daughter had destroyed, did not skip a beat: she pulled me immediately, urgently into an enormous bear hug. “Oh, oh,” she soothed, squeezing me. “Moving is too much. And it’s hard being the mom, isn’t it?”
The gift was being seen in my subterranean strife. The experiences I was navigating — moving, motherhood, tantrums, dental visits — were so run-of-the-mill, so common, that it felt like I must not let myself admit my flailing in them. And here was a stranger telling me: “This all makes sense. This tracks.”
I am pocketing this for future use; I must pay this particular kindness forward.
*Sharing her name because she deserves the recognition. I will never forget her generosity.
Shopping Break.
+The Internet is going crazy over this glitzy mini (more sizes here, and available in pink here). CUTE for holiday cocktail parties.
+FUN gem drop earrings at a great price.
+These are very similar to a more expensive set of candlestick holders I keep on my dining room table most of the year. I love the midcentury vibe. Fill with tapers in a seasonal color!
+Shopbop has heavily discounted a bunch of items, including this adorable Ulla J. dress — originally almost $600, now under $150. Lovely for a bride-to-be but I think I will buy for myself.
+TBH, this set of four Maille mustards would be an ideal way to fill my stocking. If you haven’t tried their Rich Country mustard, you haven’t lived yet. My mouth is watering just thinking of it. A dream on sandwiches or served alongside kielbasi/other garlic sausage. Sometimes I even dip hard pretzels into it. (Again, fellow vinegar heads, please identify yourself and corroborate with your own favorite mustards.)
+Another fun pair of sherpa loafers to consider. I have been wearing this similar pair ALL THE TIME. They are functional in the sense that they are super-warm — it feels like you’re wearing socks with your loafers! I’ve been stopped multiple times by strangers asking about them! I like them both with midi-length dresses (like tartan nap dresses) and jeans/sweaters.
+I just ordered this book on the recommendation of a Magpie after I mentioned on Instagram how sensitive I am to families navigating sight disorders and/or blindness given my daughter’s eye condition. Description: “Driving through mountain fog to the beach, two young brothers compete to see who will catch the first glimpse of the ocean, but it is their blind sister Nellie who senses it first.”
+Affordable sensory bin kits — would make great gifts! (ICYMI, I’m a huge proponent of sensory play. It got us through the depths of the pandemic.)
+This oversized velvet blazer is fabulous in the paisley.
+These $26 knit lounge pants come in multiple great colors.
+A timeless wardrobe classic.