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I have been thinking a lot lately about fractionality and its virtues. Last week, Mr. Magpie mentioned the concept of a “fractional CMO/CFO” — the idea is that you pay a tenured, likely retired, executive a fraction of her annualized salary for a few hours of strategy and counsel each month. You might not be able to afford the full-time commitment of an experienced CMO or CFO for your small business, but you can get something. And something is better than nothing. In just a few hours of consultation, she might point your nose in the right direction; she might offer the prized introduction you’d never have scored on your own; or she might help you shortcut your way through a learning process by referencing her battle scarred ledger. My point is that we can’t let perfect be the enemy of good enough. I’ve been carrying this insight with me everywhere. Has this ever happened to you: you finally work up the begrudging energy to exercise, and you hate every minute of it? It’s an unsatisfying session: your body and mind riot against your every movement; you skip the final abs section; you scowl into your sweaty towel. But the truth is, you did more than you think. Some exercise is better than no exercise. A middling effort is better than zero effort. So, like, shed that perfectionism!
Let me also propose the concept of a fractional date. A midday lunch, a thirty minute errand, an hour of quiet conversation while your thirteen year old niece plays a card game with the little ones in the basement. I myself went on two dates with Landon last week. Neither were planned or exotic – I simply got to a point in the holidays where I thought some time alone would be restorative, asked our teenage neighbor if she was available, and off we went for happy hour cocktails, 10 minutes from our home, twice in a week. We didn’t have reservations; we didn’t stay for dinner. We were just two tired and mainly happy parents sitting at a bar, letting our hearts spill out over cocktails.
This is the truth: love doesn’t fret over the furnishings. Connection can happen anywhere. The magic of a marriage will show itself in a parking lot, in a hospital room, in a medium bar with medium drinks, in the dim light of a midnight nursery with a crying newborn. Life, and love, are happening right now, in the imperfect present. This is all we can safely say we have: today, with its bad timing and its broken dishwasher and its hint of an incoming cold. Today, with its Invisalign trays and unfinished housework. Today, with the people we love as they are right now.
Which is to say: call the sitter, make the date. Put your love first.
Post Scripts.
+More notes on dating our spouses.
+Marriage is…! (A lot of things.)
+On being truly happy for friends.
Shopping Break.
+Laura Mercier makes the best setting powder. I’ve used this forever, and keep coming back to it!
+Extra 25% off Tory Burch. LOVE this green coatigan, this printed silk dress, and this unusual and very chic taupe dress.
+I know Warby Parker has been around forever but I was just looking for some chicer glasses options than my optometrist offers and I realized they now have filters for “extra narrow faces” and you can even do a virtual try-on on their site! I am going to order these! (I only wear my glasses during the 10-20 minutes after I’ve washed my face but before I totally wind down for bed, so this is a nominal time but why not have a cute pair?)
+These trousers remind me a lot of La Ligne’s Colbys, but come in petite lengths and are more wallet-friendly.
+Apparently these are just as good as the original beauty blender, but a fraction of the price.
+I just noticed this caftan is currently heavily discounted. I lived in this last the last two summers (but owned in a pink color).
+Cutest sandals for minis at Cat and Jack (Target): these and these! While you’re there: these look very similar to Lulu aligns. Pair with a half-zip in the same color. Also digging this longline, oversized sweatshirt for under $30!
+My kids would love these Valentine’s Day decorate-yourself mailboxes!
+Appointed sent me an acrylic stand with calendar cards this year (now sold out, sorry – they do still have their wall calendar, and/or this is similar, and my girlfriend Inslee illustrates the most spectacular ones each year, too) and I can’t believe how often I use it. Like, hourly? I swear I’m constantly trying to schedule things / quickly get a sense of which day is what, and it’s such a helpful cue! I’ve also been crossing out the days on which I exercise (even if it’s “a fractional workout,” ha), which has been strangely satisfying. Strongly rec!
+Chic Cloudmonsters for the new year.
+Cesta’s 40% off sale ends today. I absolutely adore their “lunchpail” handbags — shockingly versatile, as they work easily with cocktail dresses and more casual attire — and several are deeply discounted, and I love this neutral version of my pareo (I own the rainbow colored one).
+Microtrend for 2025: been seeing lots of these fringed moccasins!